Hidden sex public

The Imo State government has raised the alarm that some disgruntled politicians want to hijack the current #EndSARS protests to unleash mayhem in the state. The government disclosed that a high ... The Coalition Save Nigeria (CSN) has urged youths not to allow themselves to be used by disgruntled politicians to destroy the country through the #EndSARS protests. While admitting that it is in place for every Nigerian to seek better governance, the CSN said the current exercise may have been hijacked by those against the interest of […] Rep. Abigail Spanberger (D-Va.) and her Republican challenger Del. Nick Freitas (R-Culpeper) sparred Tuesday night in their first televised debate over coronavirus relief, health care, increasing ... A quick summary of the current state of the game - player knowledge and proficiency distribution between game modes. Gameplay. ... who have grown disgruntled with Storm League and play alongside friends (those who have not yet managed to acquire a higher rank).

2016.07.11 00:47 dehydro Hidden public sex

For those disgruntled by the current state of /holdthemoan.
[link]


2020.10.20 23:11 QK_QUARK88 Hidden sex public

There are 214 questions, so two for each axe because i only did for the first 107 axes.
Each question can be answered with 5 answer choices, being :

  1. Agree A Lot
  2. Agree A Little
  3. Neutral ( Or Don't Know )
  4. Disagree A Little
  5. Disagree A Lot
Each axe has 9 possible positions, the 4 at the left side, the 4 at the right side and a neutral position at the exact middle.
For each axe, there is one question that, if agreed, refers more to the left side and another one wich refers more to the right side.
At the start, every position is at the exact center.
When saying " Agree A Little " , the position gets 1 case towards the concerned side.
When saying " Agree A Lot " , it moves 2 cases towards the side.
Same thing with " Disagree A Little " and " Disagree A Lot " , but with an opposite effect ( Moves 1 or 2 cases in the other direction ) .
Saying " Neutral ( Or Don't Know ) " don't change the position on the axe.
For example, at the question " Basing the economy on private gains is the key to prosperity " , wich is related to the right side of the economic axe, these are the possibilities :
  1. " Agree A Lot " moves 2 cases towards the right
  2. " Agree A Little " moves 1 case towards the right
  3. " Neutral ( Or Don't Know ) " don't move the position
  4. " Disagree A Little " moves 1 case towards the left
  5. " Disagree A Lot " moves 2 cases towards the left
Questions are presented randomly to avoid too much bias and with 5 buttons for each choice.
At the end of the test, a PNG image will show up.
It is the axes grid with encircled cases at the person's position.

The questions for each axe are presented like this :

- [ Name of the axe ]
[ Question refering to the left ]
[ Question refering to the right ]

There they are :
- Economic
Socialism is a great idea wich should be adopted
Basing the economy on private gains is the key to prosperity
- State
The state must be as small as possible
The state must intervene in the citizen's lifes
- Nation
Collaboration with the other countries is important to establish an international group
My nation is better than the average and should be promoted
- Social
Social progress is the key for the amelioration of society
Older values are better and should be kept protected
- Technical Progress
Technical progress is bad and should be kept as slow as possible, if not stopped or reversed
We must accelerate scientific discoveries at the fastest rate possible
- Religion
Living beings evolved and think with their brain
There is a significant chance that god exist
- Radicality
I don't really care about politics and i am around the political center
I care a lot about politics and have very extreme positions
- Manifestation
A revolution is usually needed to make actual change happen
We have no right to violently manifest because it can cause trouble
- Leader
Anyone should be able to be part of the government
The head of state must be someone competent
- Political
We must guarantee the citizens the power to elect someone else if the ruler is unfit for them
A ruler should have strong power to ensure stability
- Foreign
Foreign relations should be kept minimal
Having good relations with the other countries is vital to the nation
- Cultural
Every new ethnicity added to the nation is a plus to our culture
Our culture should be protected from possible assimilation
- Realisation
My ideology's project is utopian and will never fully be possible
It is nearly impossible for my ideology to fail
- Morality
There should be more loosening concerning social values
There are good things and bad things
- Economic Intervention
Without regulation, compagnies will obvioulsy do something bad
The freer the market, the better the economy
- Age
You don't need to be old to be competent
Wisdom comes with age
- Order
Things are good when organized
Too much order is a waste of time and resources
- Perception
People tend to see my ideology as being morally good
People are seeing my ideology as evil
- Structure
Strong central government is needed to ensure that the country won't fall apart
Localities should have more power as they are closer to their population
- Wackyness
My ideology pretty much fill the standards and is pretty common
My ideology don't seem usual or common to people
- Police
Police's power should be great to ensure security
The police has no right to force me to do things
- Criminal
Criminals are not always badly intentionned
Criminals deserve to be punished
- Mindset
The only things that matter in the universe are material beings
There is more in the universe than just matter and energy, like spirits and more
- Historical
My ideology won't be fully operational until future progress
My ideology would only work in earlier stages of humanity
- Natality
It is the women's right to keep their baby or not
Abortion usually has bad consequences
- Cohesion
My ideology is well consolidated and have complementary ideas
My ideology risk falling apart because of it's contradictions
- Environment
Environmental concerns are more important than profits
Industrialisation is the path to prosperity
- Axes
The more axes, the more precise the test is
We should keep the political visualisations as small as possible
- Tax
There is no reason why the rich should pay more tax
Without taxation, the rich would not contribute to common good
- Art
The classical or antic arts are the most pleasant to look at
The new ways of making artistic creations are cool and beautiful
- Criminal Code
There is a clear definition of what is a crime or not
No matter if the act was good or bad, what makes it a crime is it's consequences
- Work
It is not necessary to always seek for production when working because being reposed is a good thing
At work, people should do their best everytime to be productive
- Freedom Of Speech
No one should ever be restricted in his right to speak
There are things that are better not said
- Facts
Feelings are more important than the truth
Facts are essential to the understanding of reality
- Education
Education is essential to ensure a bright future for the nation
Education is a waste of time because you can live well without it
- Weapons
Weapons should be distributed to the people
Weapons should be freely available for buying
- Trade
We don't need to trade with other countries to have a strong economy
Trade isolation for autarky purposes are ultimately destined to failure
- Opinions
Any opinion has it's place and is subject to debate
It is important to standarise people's opinions to avoid political instability
- Animal Rights
Animals should be treated as more than just food sources
Animals evidently have less needs than humans
- Workplace
The workers should have more control over the means of production
When the workers are more obedient to their bosses, the production is increased
- Immigration
We should only accept the good foreigners into our borders
We should make immigration more easy for foreigners
- Irony
I don't really believe in the ideology i stand for
Everything i say is sincere because there is no place for jokes
- Manigance
It is immoral to plan for chenanigans
I don't have a problem in ploting against people
- Militarisation
A high level of weaponisation among the population is wishable
Gun ownership must be restricted as much as possible
- Opposition
If there is a significant number of people wanting change, it is evident that it is the right thing to do
If the opposants really want change, they will have to prove their force
- Social Interaction
The more friends i have, the happier i am
I prefer calm environment where i'm alone
- Brain
The only things that matter is doing a practical work
Creativity can be better than pure utility
- Justice
There is no place for feelings when judging people on their crimes
Sometimes, we must admit that emotions are stronger than the laws
- Action
The capacity of planning is a great virtue
Adaptation is superior to planning
- Equality
It is evident that no humans are superior to others
It is indeniable that some individuals are more worthy than others
- Exploitation System
Linux is a good exploitation system
Windows is a good exploitation system
- Drug
Drugs allow for a good time, so we must legalise them
Drugs are destroying the health of people and should be banned
- Marriage
People should marry who they want to
Marriage should be banned or arranged in some way
- Sex
People can have sex with as many people as they want
It should be forbidden to have sex or to masturbate
- Libido
Sex could be used to make money with prostitution or pornography
Pornography is extremely nefast and should be banned
- Gender Supremacy
Feminism is important to ensure women's rights
Men are inherently better than women
- Israël - Palestine
Palestine is the legitimate owner of his land
Israël deserves the land it has
- Science Type
Social and human sciences are more important than physical sciences
Understanding the laws of universe is more significant than understanding humans
- Apocalypse
It is more probable that the end of the world will be caused by classical causes of destruction
The end of the world will probably be caused by something never seen before, something very unusual or improbable
- West - East
During the cold war, the free world was the best side
During the cold war, the soviet values were superior
- PRC - Taïwan
Taïwan rightfully deserves power on mainland China
PRC won the civil war, so it is China's legitimate government
- Chinese Revolution
The Ming dysnasty was crippling China and it's a good thing it's gone
The Ming dysnasty deserved to keep the power in China
- Power Source
The good old power sources are the best
We should rely on more durable power sources
- Genders
We need to keep the number of genders as small as possible because it is impossible that so many genders exist
There should be as many genders as there is different people
- Army
The less army, the better the nation
Conscription is necessary to protect the nation
- Memes
The original way of making memes is the best
New types of memes are better than the dead ones
- Attitude
I like to provoke people with my opinions
I prefer not to anger people with controversial phrases
- Conspiracy
Conspiracy theories are ridiculous and should not be taken seriously
There are evidence that there are plots that are hidden from us
- Tier List
My ideology is better than others
My ideology is worse than others
- School
The state must take a important part of the education
It is better for students that they educate themselves without school
- Universe
The humans are the most relevant thing in the universe
Our presence in the universe is insignificant
- Body Mass
I am not really active physically and kind of fat
I exercise regulary and have a good muscle stature
- Game
Roblox is a great game
Minecraft is a great game
- Attack
There is no such good attack as a mass offensive of cheap soldiers
We must limit the human losses at minimum while staying as far as possible of the conflict
- Healthcare
Public healthcare is a basic human right
The poor don't deserve to be healed if they don't want to pay
- Public Transport
Transportation is more efficient when public
There is no reason why people who can't afford transport could still travel
- Mandate
We need to keep our current ruler as long as possible
We need to periodically replace our ruler with time
- British Empire
The british empire was a plague wich should never come back
The british empire should reclaim it's past glory
- Transexual
Transexual people are not really of the sex they pretend to be
Transexual people should be refered as the sex they say they are
- Landscape
The mainland is better because it's there we can do great things
I like being on the sea or the ocean and it is a great thing to easily access water
- Sand
I like when my soil has sand
Sand should be eliminated from my soil
- Clay
I like when my soil has clay
Clay should be eliminated from my soil
- Silt
I like when my soil has silt
Silt should be eliminated from my soil
- Cum
Cum is disgusting
Cum tastes good
- Gaming
Gaming has mostly nefast effects on people and therefore should be reduced
Gaming is fun and upgrades many abilities
- Election Result
The people who vote has no power, the people counting the vote have it
Anyone who present himself at an election should have at least a little power
- Opinion Mismatch
I tend to easily accept confronting opinions
When someones disagrees with me, it is clear that he is wrong and i am right
- Emotion
I feel sad most of the time
Most of the time, i feel happy
- House
It is better when people share the same habitation
It is better when people have separate residences
- Ohio
Ohio deserve to take a more important place in the world
Ohio should be kept as a state, or even be reduced or destroyed
- Disability
We should make the life of people with disabilities as easy as possible even with their handicap
We should make sure that our population has the less disabled people possible
- Hair
I prefer my hair short
I prefer long hair
- Hat
Hats are a negative thing and should be kept to specific occasions
Hats are a great way of showing who we are and we should encourage wearing them
- Gambling
Gambling is a good thing to do because it let us earn money and have fun
Gambling is a sin that should be banned from our society
- Court
There should be a giant trial when people are judged
A good fight is a good way to resolve a conflict
- Alaska
Alaska deserve to be granted independance from the USA
Alaska must stay a state of the USA
- Map
I prefer maps wich show a greater area
Smaller maps are more useful and precise
- Border
There is no need for reinforced borders
A strong border is necessary to keep the nation safe
- Currency
There is a reason why the good old ways of paying still exist
We must modernise our currency system to embrace the new monetary technologies
- Climate
I prefer cold weather than heat waves
Hot temperature is better
- Corruption
It is unacceptable that government's officials get influenced by particulars
Sometimes, money from taxes isn't enough and we need to gather more from generous sources
- Location
Living in a farm is cool
Living in a city is cool
- Body Part
I prefer the lower part of women
I prefer the upper part of women
- Domestic Animal
Dogs are better than cats
Cats are better than dogs
- Spain Region
East Spain is better
West Spain is better
- Appreciation
This test was awfully bad
This test was wonderful
submitted by QK_QUARK88 to Infiniteaxesmemes [link] [comments]


2020.10.20 22:29 HYPERGRAPHICbuild Hidden sex public

"Influence sophistry"
"Influence sophistry" is a phrase useful for describing when a person uses authenticity or any other form applied to influential manipulation, in a structure drawing from one area of life and applying that to another area, with the source of authenticity and the motive or intended goal concealed, occulted, or hidden from the targeted persons conscious or sometimes unconscious understanding, generating an influence towards an unwitting victim.
It is usually used by opportunistic, conspiratorial or dangerous people, with ulterior motives or personal gain at the expense or disregarding the informed consent of the victim, and being used to generate authenticity in their role as a manipulator towards their targeted person, likely a member of the opposite sex, who is to be exploited, manipulated, or used as an object by them in the context of a romantic relationship. During the course of this relationship, "influence sophistry" can also generate "traumatic bonding" or "trauma bonding" and this can unfortunately also be structurally wielded against the target emotionally and psychologically.
Another phrase for this is a "complex manipulation".
An example of this playing out in life would be a person who psychologically triagulates another person, getting information or prior knowledge of them conspiratorially or through covert surveillance of that target- person, and then contriving a "first meeting", the manipulating party mentioning any shared interests with emotional authenticity, or applying engineered bonding and manipulation methodologies tailored to that person through psychological and emotional profiling, thusly "lying by omission" while covering up the aspect of contrived psychological predation they are carrying out.
This could manifest for example by them saying saying something as innocuous seeming as "Oh, I love such and such a subject, how do you feel about it..." e.t.c and using those emotions, taking a genuine interest but only in the extraction of informational value, for more psychological leverage later, while using the "taking an interest" as authenticity, and while trying to hide the contrivance or connivance aspect of their overall plan. It also stereotypically crops up during a narcissitic personality disorder, or narcissistic person's typical early relationship campaign of "lovebombing" against their prospective co-dependent, or other target. What makes this absolutely dysfunctional is the ulterior motive.
They then might take on a more "carrot and stick" format behaviorally or influence wise as the relationship goes on, with the provision of healthier emotions or approval, only when they have to, and colder affect or other subconscious influence, making the target work for attention too much as much as they can, and at times being too much of an unreciprocal complexity for them. It could even lead to more psychologically dangerous intense emotional episodes, or degenerate into "negging" episodes. As a worst case scenario they could even use these "emotional leveraging" moments in the relationship, appalingly if so, to achieve or induce a suicide in the victim, or go too far and cause one to eventually happen accidentally by providing small amounts of meaningful-to-the-victim carrot, and much more manipulation "stick" for a bit too long term an amount of time, or with too much complexity for the target to be able to handle, episodically.
The authenticity is usually wielded thematically, symbolically, emotionally (sometimes being very glibly and machiavellianly transferred from one area to another), conceptually, intellectually, linguistically, as sophistry, and in a negatively functional role within the overall manipulation structure as something of a methodology to engineer states of mind with, and be able to exploit, manipulate, extract value, continue to stoke up or maintain the durational viability of the situation, and achieve their goals, often at the expense of the target overall in their life.
This situation could arise through group conspiracy also, and psychological triangulation by group members of the human species, village or town members, people in given vested interest demographics on a mass scale even. This could be achieved for example by people surveilling ex partners, monitoring them emotionally and psychologically and using bits of their emotions, interests or moments of significance as a source of content for designed authenticity manipulations, used by the "Influence sophist" or "Relationship manipulator" on the target woman**.**
A, towards, most novel possible version of this described next, here somewhat in the third person, for the sake of convenience, would be a structure where two people are in "Manchurian candidate" positions, both being manipulated by a massive demographic group of people, or many of the species.
The targeted womans "lie by omission manipulator" could be getting information from the social environment, hyperlinguistically, through facial theory of mind communications with people unknown to her, or by deduction. Members of the public also spying on her ex-partner, and possibly relaying it to the manipulator, or he gleaning things from the mass media, and media content from 20th century history.
This could be being done as a psychological operation of sorts, done to influence mass political and social events on a long term time span, authenticity being generated among the perceptions of the overall group at particular key moments or moments of significance, working on them for a time. For example through media representations, for particular goals that would otherwise have been impossible, particular vested interests being served, while some other demographics are worse off.
Say for example wealthy buisness people, property owners v.s those in business who do not own property, they could manage to use influence and power wielding this "authenticity influence sophistry" to connive a faked "disaster" in which some business operations are no longer permitted, this playing out like a disaster movie but only somewhat dystopian, and then selling this to the public with the help of some more authenticity from metacultural and hyperlinguistic representations and content based on the "manchurian candidate" persons of interest, delivered through the televison and other internet media.
This content pertaining to aspects of an ongoing dialog between the ochlocratic mass of the public, the technocratic aspects of the species, the unified/wholistic aspects, individual contributions, all integrated, and paying a lot of unwanted attention to one of the "Manchurian candidates", who has by that time, and actually by several years previous, on his own, realised a good bit of the reality of the situation, and tries in the years after that to help the other manchurian candidate the only ways he can from his limited position, he is hopeful he has helped with integration aspects of the other persons journey in life, and possible present situation as a person being influenced by a "lie by omission manipulator" or "Influence sophist" in other words also describable possibly as "a handler".
It'd make a good book eh?
submitted by HYPERGRAPHICbuild to iteration [link] [comments]


2020.10.20 14:00 Angel466 Hidden sex public

PART ONE HUNDRED AND NINETY-SIX
I won’t say we didn’t have sex in the car. Nor will I say how often we didn’t have that sex, but in the end, I won the battle over the underwear. Because I was not getting out of the car until she had some on. The part I didn’t get is why she pulled a pair out of her clutch purse … and why the hell there was so little of it.
A skimpy black satin G-string that I helped her into after we cleaned ourselves up. It hugged her hips and disappeared between the cheeks of her backside. “You’re trying to kill me here, aren’t you?” I asked, as she lowered her black leather dress over it and turned around to face me.
She grinned and leaned forward to kiss me. “Only in the best way, honey-bear.”
As we did every time we arrived at our destination, we stashed all of our ... supplies .... in a tied disposable bag hidden in the centre console. I knew it was never there when we came back, but at least by tying it off and knowing the bag was opaque, it was a sealed package that could have been any manner of trash. Just the thought of leaving that stuff where Donald or Thomas could see it had me blushing all the way to my toes.
“What’s wrong, Sam?” She asked, lowering the privacy screen and window settings once we were both presentable. It was only then that I looked outside, and realised we weren’t at the motel. We were at a drop-off point for the concert itself.
My blush turned to panic. “Gerry!” I hissed, as Donald opened the door on to the sidewalk, having taken his cue from the windows returning to their usual tinting.
She slid her hand into mine and squeezed. “We were running late, honey-bear. So I had Donald bring us straight here. It’s okay. We won’t miss anything. Daddy always has someone waiting on the door to take us straight through to our seats.”
But I didn’t get a chance to check … I mean …
I glanced down at myself, finding no obvious flaws in my pants. She smiled and cupped my cheek, lifting my attention back to her. “C’mon, handsome. You’re with me. It’ll be fine.”
I huffed out a frustrated breath and climbed over the console to follow her out her open door. Clefton’s older music was already being piped through the speakers, minus the singer himself, reminding people who they were coming to see.
Clefton was a second-generation musician who drew in crowds no matter where he went. His father officially retired when Clefton took to the stage in his own right, but every now and then Piper joined his son on the stage without notice to sing a duet, causing everyone in the audience to go crazy.
Well, even more crazy than they already were. Both of them could play any musical instrument they laid their hands on, and during those duos, they would either sing the most touching tributes to each other or confiscate instruments from the band in an effort to ‘outdo’ one another. Piper even made a tambourine sound cool. Or maybe it was the dance he put on with it. Either way, it was all in good fun. They might have been performing for the crowd, but there was no denying the love they shared for each other during it.
I know. Because I spent a lot of time over the last decade staring at those YouTube clips, wondering what that relationship was like.
But I had my own dad now, and he was not only everything I wanted him to be, but he'd also always been there. I just didn’t know it.
A wall of security guards stood between us and the door Geraldine was dragging us towards. The front runners folded their arms and tensed, but a pair of small hands appeared between two of them and a small woman in all black with a headset on squeezed through them. “You’re late, Miss Portsmith,” she said, by way of greeting.
“Excuse you!” Gerry snapped, and I could see her losing her temper if I didn’t smooth things over.
“It was completely my fault,” I said, drawing the woman’s attention to me and donning an apologetic smile. “Are we too late?”
The woman looked me over and smirked. “I’m still here, aren’t I?” She flicked her head towards the door. “C’mon. I’ll show you to your seats.” She walked right towards the most intimidating guy in the line. “Let us through, Nick.”
Like everyone on the line, he wore a black t-shirt at least twenty sizes too small for him, drawing attention to the muscular bulges that filled every inch of the fabric. His large, mirrored glasses kept me from seeing his eyes and everything else about his face seemed to be carved in granite. Jesus, he was intimidating. Especially looking like he could snap us in half and use our broken bones for toothpicks.
Instead of stepping aside, he maintained his steadfast position. “Pretty please with a dozen sugared cherries and a whole can of caramel nut whipped cream on top?” the woman asked as she walked her fingers across his forearm, her grin implying this was an old game between them.
His lips then parted into a matching lopsided grin, changing everything about him. In a heartbeat, he went from an unmovable behemoth to just a regular guy with big muscles. “Sure thing, sugar,” he said with a slight southern drawl as he dropped his folded arms and twisted to one side, allowing the three of us to pass.
“Always the gentleman,” she laughed, patting his abs on the way past.
“Enjoy the show,” Nick said as Geraldine and I followed in the woman’s wake.
“Thanks, Nick,” I said, and although I still couldn’t see his eyes, I saw his head jerk more fully towards me. I grinned shyly and rolled my fingers in a small wave that I hoped Geraldine wouldn’t see. Because this was her night, and I didn’t want to do anything to spoil it for her.
As I expected, the crowd was massive. It was just as well we had a guide because even though we had front row seats, navigating Madison Square Garden under these conditions was sheer madness. It was also a good thing neither of us was claustrophobic.
When we went into the venue itself, the stage was set up in a star pattern, indicative of a Clefton concert. The famous musician hated the idea of people paying money to see less of him, so he always brought his rotating stage with him, wherever he went. With enough overhead video feeds to give everyone a really good show.
It wasn’t until we were led past the regular seating and into the gaps between the star prongs where more seating had been added that I realised a security guard stood in the shadows of each prong’s corner. With only five seats at the very front of each section, that made a forty percent ratio of guards to front seat viewers, and the way they were shorter by a foot or so, they were easy to miss. I only just managed to catch the reflection from their glasses that were also black (unlike the mirrored ones the guards outside wore). Once we took our seats, those two would still be able to see.
Clefton may have loved to perform, but the family were taking no chances with his safety. I gave Gerry the very middle seat and slid into my allocated seat beside her.
Unlike other entertainers, Clefton openly encouraged the use of cell phones to film him during his shows, putting professional details at the bottom of both his tickets and program guides for where people could send links to their footage. The fans loved it when he incorporated their footage into his publicity. Not that he would do it himself. At a guess, he had a team of people poring over it for the best material.
Geraldine slid her hands through mine in excitement as the lights dimmed and a hush filtered through the crowd. Everyone waited to see how Clefton would open the show since no two were alike.
A single, monotone sound crept through the sound system. Deep, echoing. It reminded me of the time I’d seen someone playing a digeridoo during one of our Greenpeace clean-ups to lift up everyone's dwindling spirits. For almost two solid minutes, the sound kept up. I watched as the band used this time to slip into position on the stage.
Everyone was poised, waiting.
A change of tone for one beat was the only indication that it wasn’t some manner of white noise. And then another. Like a heartbeat. On the next heartbeat, it didn’t drop back down…
…until the lights flooded what appeared to be a concealed amplifier as the cover was lifted to reveal Clefton still holding the note with the old-fashioned microphone he held to his lips. He was dressed in similar era-styled clothes, with bell-bottoms and platform shoes.
He let that note die out, with him staring at the stage floor.
Then, in the ensuing silence, he jerked his head up again, looking around at the audience as if seeing them for the first time. “How y’all doin’, New York?”
Screeches and screams from all over the stadium deafened me momentarily. His grin broadened at their response and he started bobbing and shimmying on the spot without moving his feet, clapping his hands together. Before long everyone was clapping with him.
“I feel like I could bust out of my skin! Let’s party people!” he shouted, and throwing the old-style microphone aside, he leapt forward and tore out of those old clothes, revealing clean-lined denim jeans and a plain shirt. The platform aspect of the shoes was left behind as well, dropping him down on to regular small-soled footwear. The band and the light show came to life in a crazy beat that brought the whole audience (myself included) to our feet, cheering and applauding. I had no idea how he was doing that, but nor did I care. This was amazing!
I didn’t even notice the small, beige ear hook microphone until he pulled it down in front of his mouth and began a drum roll of his tongue against the back of his teeth that belonged in another continent yet matched the fast-paced beat perfectly as he clapped his hands and shimmy-danced across the stage. His band were just as into it as he was, dancing as best they could while playing their instruments. The whole of Madison Square Garden felt alive at that point.
The stage was already pivoting away from us, but with the huge overhead screens, we weren’t missing a thing!
* * *

PART ONE HUNDRED AND NINETY-SEVEN

Previous Part 195
((All comments welcome))
((AUTHOR'S NOTE: If anyone is interested in that original WP that had Clefton in it, it's here))
I made a family tree/diagram of the Mystallian family that can be found here
For more of my work including previous parts or WPs: Angel466 or indexed here
FULL INDEX OF BOB THE HOBO TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!
submitted by Angel466 to redditserials [link] [comments]


2020.10.20 12:46 rusticgorilla Hidden sex public

Welcome to Lost in the Sauce, keeping you caught up on political and legal news that often gets buried in distractions and theater… or a global health crisis.
Housekeeping:

  • HOW TO SUPPORT: I know we are all facing unprecedented financial hardships right now. If you are in the position to support my work, I have a patreon, venmo, and a paypal set up. No pressure though, I will keep posting these pieces publicly no matter what - paywalls suck.
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October surprise Trump and allies are pushing an unverified and highly suspicious narrative to smear Joe Biden by trying to tie him to his son Hunter Biden’s work in Ukraine. Last week, the New York Post published emails and photos allegedly from a laptop belonging to Hunter - but without any proof of provenance.
What we know: The NYP story: Hunter Biden (who lives in Los Angeles) dropped off multiple laptops at a computer repair shop in Delaware in April 2019 and disappeared. The invoice he allegedly signed was for the low price of $85. The repair shop owner recovers and reads Hunter’s private emails, a few of which mention a possible meeting with his dad, and is so alarmed that he contacts the FBI in November 2019. Before handing the laptops over, though, the repair shop owner copies the contents. Once he realizes the FBI is not doing anything with them, he contacts Giuliani’s lawyer (sometime in early 2020) and hands over the contents of the drives. Giuliani and/or his lawyer then sits on the material for months, finally deciding to release them (with some prompting of Steve Bannon) three weeks before the election.
  • The NYP story was “mostly” written by longtime-NYP reporter Bruce Golding, but he “did not allow his byline to be used because he had concerns over the article’s credibility.” Instead, the lead reporter credited is Emma-Jo Morris, a former producer of Sean Hannity’s show on Fox News (owned by Rupert Murdoch, just like the NYP). Between Wednesday and Sunday, the NYP published more than 50 separate stories and columns tagged “Hunter Biden.”
What the docs published by NYP said: An email dated April 17, 2015, suggests Hunter Biden arranged for a top executive at a Ukrainian energy firm to meet with the then-vice president when he was in charge of U.S. policy toward Ukraine. There is no proof the email is authentic, nor is there proof that such a meeting occurred or that “Hunter” even replied to it.
What experts say: WaPo journalist David Ignatius reports that an Eastern European expert in digital forensics who has examined some of the Ukrainian documents leaked to the New York Post said he “found anomalies — such as American-style capitalization of the names of ministries — that suggest fakery.” Thomas Rid, author of “Active Measures,” told WaPo: “Usually when emails are leaked, what investigators look for is the actual email file, and we don’t have that here.” When an email is presented without the metadata, he said, “then you become suspicious.”
Russian op: U.S. intelligence agencies warned the White House last year that Giuliani was the target of an influence operation by Russian intelligence. The intelligence raised concerns that Giuliani was being used to feed Russian misinformation to the president, leading national security adviser Robert O’Brien to caution Trump in a private conversation that any information Giuliani brought back from Ukraine should be considered contaminated by Russia. Trump had “shrugged his shoulders” at O’Brien’s warning, the former official said, and dismissed concern about his lawyer’s activities by saying, “That’s Rudy.”
  • Former National Security Adviser John Bolton repeatedly told his staff to stay out of discussions with Giuliani due to warnings he received from intelligence officials about Trump’s lawyer spreading foreign disinformation. As early as Spring 2019 Giuliani was seen as a tool of Russian intelligence.
  • A reminder that when Giuliani came to Kyiv in December he not only met Andriy Derkach, identified and sanctioned by the US as a Russian agent, he also flew out of Ukraine on a private jet connected to some shady oligarchs. When asked about meeting with Derkach, a Russian agent, Giuliani said: “The chance that Derkach is a Russian spy is no better than 50/50.” Apparently that’s a low enough risk for Rudy…
Trump knew: A source told the Daily Beast that Trump “knew [in recent weeks] that Rudy had something big coming on the Biden family...I remember hearing…something about files, and corruption, and something about sex and drugs…It was evident that the president was interested and wanted it done before the election.” Giuliani further confirmed that Trump knew about the planned leak/smear and approved of it: “Sure, sure. The president knows all about this,” Giuliani said, adding that he had briefed Trump on the “general” parameters of the files.
Chinese connection: Social media accounts connected to billionaire Chinese dissident Guo Wengui began posting about the laptop story weeks before the NYP story was published. You may recall that when Steve Bannon was arrested for fraud, he was aboard Guo’s yacht. Just days before the NYP published the alleged laptop emails, photos of Rudy Giuliani and Guo showed up on Twitter. If taken the same day as posted, that would mean he was with Guo when he reportedly gave NYP the alleged Biden materials.
Republican corruption Oracle founder Larry Ellison donated $250,000 to a political action committee supporting Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) the same day his company was declared the first official U.S. partner for TikTok. Graham was reportedly pivotal in arranging the deal, saying he personally called Trump to advocate for the sale of TikTok to a U.S. business in lieu of a total ban. “If TikTok is saved, you can thank me,” he said.
U.S. Rep. Roger Williams, a Central Texas Republican and member of the House Financial Services Committee, used his powerful post in Congress to try to help a top donor in his dealings with a publicly traded bank, court records show. Williams allegedly used&utm_source=t.co&utm_medium=referral) his position on the powerful House committee to try to force the CEO of UMB Bank into meeting with oil field investor Gary Martin of Marble Falls.
Attorney Kyle Hirsch testified under oath that Williams’ intervention exerted inappropriate pressure on UMB and that unless the CEO agreed to meet with his donor there could be problems for the bank in Congress. “The Congressman indicated that his role on the Financial Services Committee included legislation that was coming down the pike and that he was urging the bank to meet with his constituent or there would be adverse consequences as it relates to his role on the Financial Services Committee,” Hirsch said, according to his deposition in the case.
For at least seven years, GOP Rep. Jim Hagedorn (MN-1) appears to have enjoyed rent-free use of a campaign office supplied by a political donor. “It sounds like something that could potentially be a fairly serious violation of campaign finance law and the ethics rules,” said Bryson Morgan, a former investigative counsel at the Office of Congressional Ethics.
Sen. Lindsey Graham used an on-camera interview after the Supreme Court confirmation hearings Wednesday to solicit contributions for his reelection campaign, a move that a congressional legal expert said is a clear violation of Senate ethics rules. Senate ethics rules prohibit members from soliciting campaign contributions in any federal building.
“I don’t know how much it affected fundraising today, but if you want to help me close the gap — LindseyGraham.com — a little bit goes a long way,” said Graham, R-S.C, who is locked in a highly competitive race against well-funded Democratic challenger Jaime Harrison.
Sen. Martha McSally (R-AZ) has used her office’s taxpayer-funded resources to send out a robocall touting a key campaign issue—her work on COVID-19 policy—to Arizonans. Normally, mass official communication with constituents so close to an election would be prohibited. But a waiver approved by the Senate Rules Committee in March has made it permissible—if, and only if, the communication is for the purposes of “providing updated information about the pandemic, and providing information about the federal government's response.”
South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem (R) is spending $819,000 of taxpayer money on a Fox News ad promoting her state as a “place to safely explore” despite the pandemic. South Dakota currently has the highest positivity rate in the nation (36%) and the second-highest new cases per day (753 per million people), right behind North Dakota. Noem has also spent $130,000 to build a studio in the basement of the Capitol, which she has used frequently for Fox News appearances.
Court cases The DC Circuit Court of Appeals will rehear the House’s case to enforce a subpoena for former White House counsel Donald McGahn. A three-judge panel earlier ruled 2-1 that the House Judiciary Committee could not enforce the subpoena absent a law explicitly giving it the authority to do so. The majority in the previous panel was made up of now-retired Judge Thomas Griffith, a W. Bush appointee (who made way for McConnell protege Justin Walker on the court), and Judge Karen Henderson, a H.W. Bush appointee. Judge Judith Rogers, a Clinton appointee, dissented.
  • NOTE: The D.C. Circuit has essentially allowed the White House to run out the clock. The subpoena to McGahn was first issued in April 2019. In taking up the case, the full court asked the parties to address “whether the case would become moot when the Committee’s subpoena expires upon the conclusion of the 116th Congress.” Oral arguments are not scheduled until February 2021.
  • If you’re confused about why the D.C. Circuit is hearing the McGahn case again, here is the reason: The first time the court ruled on the McGahn subpoena was in August, when the full bench determined the House has standing to sue the executive branch to enforce subpoenas. This time, the issue is “cause of action,” meaning whether House Democrats have legal ground to take the subpoena issue to court.
The Supreme Court refused to hear a case brought by Democratic lawmakers against President Trump over his private businesses accepting payments from foreign governments. In declining to revive the case, the justices let stand a decision by a three-judge panel of the D.C. Circuit to dismiss the lawsuit - a win for Trump. The panel was made up of Judge Thomas Griffith (W. Bush appointee), Karen Henderson (H.W. Bush appointee), and David Tatel (Clinton appointee). All three unanimously ruled that the individual members did not have legal standing to take the president to court.
“Our conclusion is straightforward because the Members — 29 Senators and 186 Members of the House of Representatives — do not constitute a majority of either body and are, therefore, powerless to approve or deny the President’s acceptance of foreign emoluments,” the [earlier three-judge panel] ruled.
  • Note, there are still two other pending cases before the Court: Trump v. CREW and Trump v. Maryland & D.C.
Trump filed an emergency request with the Supreme Court to block the release of his tax returns. Last week, a federal appeals court ruled Manhattan District Attorney Cyrus Vance can enforce a subpoena for Mr. Trump's business records and tax returns.
SCOTUS cases coming up: On Nov. 30, SCOTUS will hear arguments to determine whether the Trump administration can exclude unauthorized immigrants from the 2020 census count. Next year, SCOTUS will take up two challenges to Trump’s immigration policies: his diversion of military funds to pay for construction of the southern border wall, and a policy that has required tens of thousands of asylum seekers to remain in Mexico while their claims are processed.
  • Three Muslim men who said they were placed for years on a “no-fly” list because they refused to become FBI informants told the Supreme Court on Tuesday that they should be able to sue the agents for targeting them because of their religion.
A federal judge Sunday struck down a Trump administration rule that could have stripped food stamps from nearly 700,000 people. Chief Judge Beryl Howell (Obama appointee) of the D.C. District Court wrote: "The final rule at issue in this litigation radically and abruptly alters decades of regulatory practice, leaving states scrambling and exponentially increasing food insecurity for tens of thousands of Americans.”
Miscellaneous Russia: The United States on Monday unsealed criminal charges against six Russian intelligence officers in connection with some of the world’s most damaging cyberattacks, including disruption of Ukraine’s power grid and the release of a mock ransomware virus that infected computers globally and caused billions of dollars in damage.
DOJ: Attorney General Bill Barr’s “unmasking” probe has quietly ended with no prosecutions or findings of wrongdoing. The investigation, conducted by U.S. Attorney John Bash, was focused on whether Obama-era officials improperly requested the identities of individuals whose names were redacted in intelligence documents.
DOJ: Phillip Halpern, a 36-year veteran of the Justice Department, accused AG Barr of abusing his power to sway the election for President Trump and said he was quitting. He said he would have quit earlier but stayed on because he worried that the department under Mr. Barr would have interfered in his prosecution of former Representative Duncan D. Hunter, Republican of California, who pleaded guilty in December to conspiracy to steal campaign funds.
Trump campaign: A newly published trove of Cambridge Analytica emails and other documents from the 2016 election demonstrate how the data firm operated as a tool for a billionaire family to unlawfully influence U.S. politics and help elect President Trump. It includes a never-before-published 27-page post-election report from February 2017 shows that Cambridge Analytica claimed credit for creating, producing, and distributing ads for the Trump campaign, which included “5,000+ ad campaigns” on behalf of Trump that generated “1.5 billion impressions.”
Trump campaign: A Chinese national whose Instagram page features pictures of him wearing a VIP pass at a 2018 rally for President Donald Trump, is now on U.S. soil after being charged with conspiring to distribute cocaine and laundering the illicit funds, according to court documents filed earlier this week.
Trump campaign: For a fourth time, pro-Trump super PAC America First Action used stock footage from Russia and Belarus in a major ad buy that’s airing in three swing states.
HHS: The health department’s top lawyer is warning in an internal memo that President Donald Trump's plan to give seniors $200 discount cards to buy prescription drugs could violate election law. The lawyer’s objection, coupled with his advice to seek approval from the Department of Justice, is a significant blow to Trump’s hope to promote the hastily devised plan before Election Day.
Trump money: The State Department says it has about 450 pages of records showing government spending at President Trump’s properties. But this week, it signaled that it plans to release only two of those pages before the November election. The State Department pays for hotel rooms and other expenses when foreign leaders visit Trump properties, and when federal employees, such as Secret Service agents, follow Trump and his family to the president’s overseas clubs.
Trump: Trump was receiving one of his first codeword classified briefings on Afghanistan, at his Bedminster club, when he suddenly got bored and ordered milkshakes. The incident became legendary inside the CIA, where like at other agencies, morale has slumped.
Voting: A deadlocked Supreme Court on Monday let stand a lower-court ruling that requires Pennsylvania election officials to count absentee ballots received within three days after Election Day, Nov. 3, even if they are not postmarked. Four justices – Clarence Thomas, Samuel Alito, Neil Gorsuch, and Brett Kavanaugh – indicated that they would have granted the Republicans’ request.
  • While a temporary win for voting rights, the 4-4 decision is worrying because once Amy Coney Barrett is confirmed, there will likely be five votes in favor of a radical, anti-democratic theory that would stop state Supreme Courts from enforcing state election laws to protect the right to vote. This Twitter thread goes into more detail.
Immigration: A total of 172 immigrants were arrested across six sanctuary cities within a six-day span, according to the US Immigration and Customs Enforcement. The arrests were made in Baltimore, Denver, New York, Philadelphia, Seattle, and Washington, DC, between October 3-9.
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2020.10.18 23:38 iamnotrealtac Hidden sex public

Hello!
I have been looking to role-play but I'm also am available to chat
 
In terms of role-play I'm suggesting incest/ageplay or beast:
Me: I would like to play your white European daddy that has a deep desire and pervert needs to seem, to touch and even more.... I would be someone who is honourable and always do the right thing (or so it would appear), however in truth had grown a desire for young girls through the years... up to now I've only gone as far as watching and take the opportunistic peek and masturbating with you and your friends' pictures given that your woman body started to show...This was obviously more of interest (to my eyes and needs) that many other girls/women. There are those moments of need (and excitement) whenever I see more of skin or perhaps the clothes are a bit short or too tight...and your body curves and prominences show ... other examples are bikinis...see through clothes, yoga pants or any underwear that normally only women use..."accidental" touching or rubbing has a very quick and noticeable effect on my uncut cock...not only it is above average...but more even his red head is massive!
You (preferred, not mandatory): my preference involves non-white, clear tan lines, sort of hourglass figure (less on the chest but nicely round around the hips thighs and nice smooth plump inner labia).
Personality/Behaviour(preferred, and again...not mandatory): Likes girly clothes...who might be too short or tight to cover fully sometimes (especially because you will realise how much it turns me on). Sweet, cute and into spending time with daddy...maybe aware of what makes daddy happy. I would like you not to be afraid to push boundaries and take small risks...making your ultimate reward my full desire...(and cum) closer at every step of the role-play.
some back ground story: As it is common for daddy to fuck her mum most of the nights, it's not surprising you have hear her moaning my name and asking for me to fuck her harder....this has certainly triggered you to be wet a few times...and maybe even motivated you to play with yourself...curious about how good do I fuck... Other things for consideration: Build up scenes and making out... I love to also please desires or wishes. I'm not very strict dominant so I can be sweet and respectful... but still wild and dom during intimacy. We can start with me arriving home and mom not around or maybe next few days we go to the pool or to the mall...wherever your imagination takes us.
 
Beasts ideas
A.You go out camping for a week with your dog during a community related event (we can pick something together, but I’ll say cosplay theme related which is pet’s friendly). During the first or second day you find your beautiful (and massive) dog knotted to a wild wolf (or another member’s pet) for a first time ever since you had him and that touches you on a personal level (either curious…or jealous). On the following day (after your dog knotted the other) you find that the plan is to head out to nearby lake, all the event participants are welcomed to bring their pets..... and it turns out to be a big lake with quite a lot of open areas as well some parts are just covered with threes and bushes making it easy to be hidden in plain sight.
What happens for the remaining days?
B. Kind farmer, naughty stallion - you visit a farm and get first hand experience with any of the animals. The farmer notices how good looking you are and tries to make a move on you acting all pervy (and kinda innocently so too)...then you get to meet the farm's great black stallion and acquinted with his much needed contribution to making foals...and with that your prioraties change...
 
some kinks I do like to tap into: build-up (can be romance or something more taboo like ageplay/incest or cheating), flirt or constant (purposely accidental) tease, clothed sex, multiple view of your penny slot pussy with you wearing skimpy outfits, unprotected/risky sex with copious amount of cum, public/familiar places (not necessarily being observed), also natural/imperfect girl bodies in your case short and light (ideally with thick hips/ass/innie pussy);
Please check my naughty kink list (https://i.imgur.com/9EOCms4.png)
Limits: rape, non-consensual, extreme pain or violence, toilet, perfect model bodies
if I missed something, please ask :)
submitted by iamnotrealtac to Dirtypenpalsuk [link] [comments]


2020.10.16 05:49 shomesrobery Hidden sex public

  • Criminal Defense
o Identify the Guilty
o Clear the Wrongfully Accused
o Verify Information & Statements
o Violent Crimes
o Property Crimes
o Sex Crimes & Allegations of Sexual Misconduct
o Sexual Harassment
o Narcotic Investigations
o Hidden Assets
o Domestic Disputes
o Infidelity Issues
o Insurance Fraud
o Allegations of Child Abuse
o Civil Rights Matters
o Allegations of Official Misconduct
o Allegations of Public Corruption
o Equal Employment Opportunity Matters
o White Collar Crimes
o Missing Persons
o Law Enforcement, Government & Security Screening
o Any Time the Need for the Truth is Important
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2020.10.14 12:30 SavageHunter9 Hidden sex public

Ugh, here we go again.
I'm sick of these jokes about reptilian aliens. They're racist, xenophobic, and incredibly bigoted.
First and foremost, the Schraschz are not aliens. They were the first sentient species to evolve on Earth, and they were rescued by the "Greys" just before the cataclysm that killed off their reptilian cousins. They were transported to Fszst (what we call GJ 667Cc), where they lived for millions of years, eventually evolving into the humanoid reptilian species we know today. While they may very well have inhabited an alien planet, their ancestors were as terrestrial as yours or mine.
With that said, they're still not hidden overlords or anything.
What makes that particular conspiracy theory so confounding and aggravating is this ridiculous notion that the Schraschz are somehow secretly in control of our society. Personally, I think we would have noticed if every one of our leaders had a projecting snout, green scales, and soft feathers instead of hair. Of course, that doesn't stop the theorists, who claim that the Schraschz use some kind of hologram technology, or that they surgically alter themselves to appear more human.
Oh, but it gets worse. Apparently, the Schraschz are here to enslave humanity (or use them for food, or other equally outrageous suggestions), but they're doing it by allowing us to develop newer and better technologies than they currently have access to? I mean, we're talking about a species that - due to humankind's xenophobia - is forced to live exclusively in regions that we find inhospitable. Even those small tribes of humans they do regularly interact with are forced to remain cut off from the outside world as a result.
Look, I understand that they're a bit scary at first sight. The idea of competing physically against a seven-foot-tall lizard is a pretty frightening one. Seriously, though, I dated a Schraschz for about a year and a half, and other than the obvious difficulties (like sex, which was a bit... interesting), I found the young lady to be both intelligent and incredibly witty. (Hell, even the accent is pretty sexy, I'll admit.) The only reason we broke up was because of ignorant bigots who would yell at her, threaten her, or even physically attack her any time she went out in public with me. (For those that care, she's living happily in the Amazon Basin now, though we don't keep in touch as much as either of us would like.)
So, yeah, this idea that they're a marauding group of malicious aliens really angers me, and I wish humanity would just learn to accept the Schraschz for who they are. They're a hell of a lot more evolved than us, and we could learn a thing or two from them.
TL;DR: These jokes aren't funny, and calling the Schraschz "lizards" is bigoted to an extreme.
Like I said this info was from someone
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2020.10.14 07:44 maggot0817 Here's my experience with wife of past 9y and my situation. Can anyone explain?

So heres my summary of k,
when we met she would brag and defend about all her past relations, flings and admirers would blow her up non stop and she would text everyone of them back and brag and joke to her friends about how she was just using them, and this is while she was in a relationship. Also had me laying with her in her bed with her almost nightly. I have never been one to come between a relationship unless ut was abusive, but she just wanted attention. So after we start dating the first time i bring my best friend who wanted to sleep with her as well and i hadn't told him we were dating she went from giving me oral for 4 seconds to hanging her ass out the window for others to see to grinding and kissing on my vest friend and called me controlling and jealous. So i told her she is grown and can make her own decisions i wasnt gonna argue and went to bed. Her friends had to tell him and after he found out he quickly pushed her aside.... then the night wr broke up she tried sleeping 2 friends and the neighbor, after we did our thing and ended up going all the way.....she didnt admit to it for weeks and laughed about it 3 days later when i had already known and it wasn't an apology either and she finished it by slapping me and saying she will still fuck the neighbor....
fast forward shes constantly leading guys on to get attention and still telling me she wants to be with me all the while after a loss i had in my family she only texted once asking what happened and what was on the note, and if i got any money from it to get a car to go visit her outta state. So while out of state she is entertaining her life crush idk but rotating me and him and telling me we are together while i wanted to not be unless exclusively how she demanded, throwing fits over ex fiance contacting when we have a child together and never anything more except i stayed to help her get situated for 1 month at her new place and to see daughter1 and stepdaughter3 while she worked days and i worked nights mainly.
While gone each time shes expecting good morning night day sweet dreams, etc etc, proof I'm not with other girls anywhere near, and long paragraph love texts and heartfelt messages, via sms, vm, vc, and after telling her family her exaggerated victimized side of the story and telling me threats and hate from her family wants me to drive x hrs away to see her for 2 hours because she is under lock and key unless with her family....oh and i rarely got any of those expected letters she demanded and if i didnt she'd complain and ignore me, so they started coming less and less over the years. Always seemed the less attention I gave the more it was craved due to work, sleeping, spending time with family, distance, or avoidance.
So she moves back in and drops her crush but now hes trying to be with her and shes torn and laughing it off all the while ex's are calling her and she has full on conversation until saying shes with someone 5 mins later while right beside me....no big deal im not jealous type, but she would get mad that would have male friends come over and would talk shit to them and run them off and say she hated them, then when we fought over stuff she held in until someone else pissed her off enough or she assumed something happened between me and another female shed flip to im abusive and controlling and crazy pressing every burton i had with a smile and turning friends and family against me forcing me out on the street or at a place where my friend didnt allow her to go.... So we get our own place some issues happen over visitation of my daughter, and her brother moving in and being a total mooch making everything worse yet defended him who was 19 yrs old and babied him and chose his side over mine, but demanded I tell him what she thought and they were just so babied and pampered its ridiculous, so she kicks me out and then 2 days later gets picked up and taken back to her home town for 3 months..... then after asking her not ri come back and begging her to stay there and keep it as just acquaintances she shows up because she wants to be free again, and after 3 weeks we return to the dark side she hides from her family. For 8 months its back and forth from i love you i hate you...
fast forward to wedding after more similar scenarios 10 times worse, we fight our honeymoon night....oh and every birthday i had or will have, and special occasions, she wants a divorce 3 months later and rinse wash repeat for 5 years+ she wants a baby to save marriage somehow and during a big disagreement, 2 weeks later pregnant,....second pregnancy after not being on board wanting financial stability first and other priorities she times and plans the conception and baby #2 on the way. Nothing against ny children snd ni regrets. Find out bc and child birth showed positive test results for mental disorders and at a time i was monogamous for 4 years almost and very little sexual activity due to opposing shift schedules, and you out and about during recent break up and me being out of state you catch an sti/std....
Imagine asking the person who begged you to marry her have kids settle down and be patient supposedly listen to your perspective just to twist it into the exact opposite saying that im lying she knows what I think what I do but if told once by anyone else something negative about me its 1000000000% true no doubt no proof needed why would someone lie? And constantly accused and neglected emotionally, sexually, intimately, lovingly, and only playfully hit or picked on and sexually teased, and constantly telling myself and others she is this way, this view, expects only this, is happy, is adventurous, and spontaneous, and turns around to be rhe exact opposite when alone without the facade, and will specifically do exactly told what I find disrespectful, refused to fight for the relationship and fought more to be right when proven wrong or when treated the same way i was getting, with double standards, stated i am not equal to the freedom a woman gets that i pay bills do chores when home and cater to her every need and when she would attempt to do what i requested or needed or desired put 3 seconds of effort to turn around and snap that i need to appreciate her effort, and that i expect to much, when i bent over backwards to please her and satisfy her and fought for her, but because after 8 years of no meaningful romantic gestures or equality I stayed in the other room playing games while she slept alone after complaining i put effort into doing something so she wouldn't and demanded i do it her way, would be her punching bag for mental issues and expect me to read her mind. When asking her a simple question of her preference having small fights over identity issues or that im being nosey and when voicing my issues calmly and composed met with self loathe and flight responses and fighting me to admit I want out and pushing me so hard to do until it got to the point of ger being brligerant abd violent forcing me out or to take some space... And to find out that for 8 years those close family friends and cousins and childhood besties are already trying to make it more 1 week after i left her for her demanding to know what I expect from her and turn around and do the opposite and for not being able to answer a question honestly because if your past is more important than what we put in while you chose to lie and keep them secret and be trophy wife by my side and turn around and be ms life if the party when not in ny presence to be still talking to me after like we never split all the while entertaining those cousins and childhood friends who have always been there for you and didnt just want sex from her....
but if all i wanted was sex why would i choose a woman who just lays on her back, does it maybe once a week if im home and who rushes the process because its a chore and the way you initiated it was by saying come here close the door hurry up so i can go to bed and if taking more than 10 or 15 mins which was rarely due to 8 years of quickies pretty much being told to finish or to take care of myself but complain when i would try to and say it hurt your feelings that i am inconsiderate, and tell me all these preferences you enjoy or have and expect me to just do it right the first time without any communication until after or angered and after going 2 or 3 or more weeks without being loved on by a woman who would hug and conversate with every man anywhere when alone whether disrespectful or not but its not okay for me to go to a strip club after nc for 2 weeks and being kicked out of the home i pay for while you run around our state free as a bird.... And during this time link with ex's and past flings and missed encounters and then want the stability back after some hardship and expect me to be fine after your infidelity, dishonesty, narcissism, self victimizing, bashing, gaslighting, and still not once have you apologized, but only bring up how after your screw ups and Saying thats fine and no big deal i do it at a fraction of the severity and its game over double standards, biased, and when asking you how come its ok for you to do something but im not at equal footing? Always ditching my family gatherings or completely ignoring to spend time at hers so she can try to do everything for everything man woman and child and complain to everyone that im not helping yiu enough, even after having them over to our place i was cast out ignored and my daughteyour step daughter as well? But not one if them helped you the way you did....but when you need money sure no prob but it always came out of ny wallet. You made last minute plans and planned to enjoy it step by step moment by moment but constantly changed your decisions and had to be in control of all the chaos while i improvised every step to suit your choice and when counseled otherwise and correct by me was a fight to follow. I spent years lifting you up keeping your head above water all the while you pushed on mine to have 6 extra inches so people could admire your appearance. I felt you were ashamed you married me, i felt that after u seen you at your worst you thought you couldn't trust me and chose to lie because i didn't deserve your time to explain your side or your truths. I spent 8 years telling almost everyone you were so right about the horrible person i am....was..... because after this last birthday i experienced it was only about you.....the one day about me specifically....i learned my lesson....i learned i am horrible.....but not because of what you lied or exaggerated or assumed and what was rumored I did to you....but because i let myself continue to be lead on and filled with hopes of experiencing a love from a lover who never believed a word I said and would use our children or an emergency to get me for support in her wants and short comings, because burning those bridges and crying rivers left her stranded.
I told you im tired of fighting with you. I told you this time you have to fight for me. I told you that I will no longer fight for you or with you until you do this and if you do you, you and I need to fight everyone else who comes between our family we made alone. It's been 2 months now and its been 2 weeks i havent heard from you or seen our children we share since you changed plans that day from staying home with them to going out while they were sick putting them at risk, after you caused them to get sick. But this is the reason why I became the way i did. Yes i know drop the past its behind you but you never changed. You still live there and just found new apps and ways to be the real you. You can say u cheated or lied and i guess yeah it was unfaithful to conversate at a bar with strippers or women, to buy them drinks, but i never made it more than that because all i could think about was how they aren't you and never will be. Asking why would a woman do this if i do this only to hear its not normal that it's covering hidden agenda or details to prevent a fight. Remember the time you broke up with me because i changed body wash/shampoo to a better balanced one for my compositions.... remember when you left because you hadn't seen your mother in 2 months? Remember when you sharted and i was the last ti find out? Remember when you were disrespectful and arrogant and rude or aggressive and bossy and when offended back became angry at me when i wasn't present? Remember when you start acting crazy and look bad in public and decide its my fault because i wasnt controlling enough to stop you? Remember when you said I deserved to lose the person who passed away? Remember when i told you my feelings for the first time and you told everyone you knew? Remember when I posted a meme with you not understanding it and you left me? Remember when you accused me if cheating and you were entertaining multiple people? Remember when you said i had addictions, while you endulged any possible? Remember when you brought up people from my past who never came around at all, yet you had every circle yours were in minus them? Remember when thats all you can do us remember? But you have a short memory so you'll move on quick like how you did with your ex to me. Remember every dream you had of me was so negative yet the ones you are with now they were the ones who you held close ....how many dreams did you abuse and mistreat me over? 5, 6, 7, maybe 16ish? You have your mind made up from my perspective.
You know i am very open minded, and have nothing but love for you. But your secrets are what killed our marriage. I was honest when asked specifically about topics or situations. I answered i explained, i gave you my truths. You deflect and avoid and accuse and alter the focus. The only people I didnt appreciate you talking to were ones who has sexual feelings for you or more than platonic, but i guess that was everyone and you couldn't handle the addiction to it over our marriage so you pushed and twisted so i would get to an image you could blame...i know what i did i apologized for the actions i was guilty of and I confessed my situations you heard otherwise.
So i gave you everything you asked for and its still not enough while you gave me the opposite of my wants and im asking to much. This is why I warned you about marriage and a real relationship not the fwb and 1 or 2 month flings....i told you if i gave it my all i expected you to do the same and you made the same vows at our wedding and i showed up but it wasnt me you wanted that day, it wasnt eternity or growth, or a commitment to be selfless for once. It was just another day meant to be about you. I gave it my all with your downs, and apparently it wasnt enough, apparently my words and actions meant less than anyone else in the universe, and i do not qualify for equality. This is the last time you'll ever get this side of me. The night before you left to visit family and party is the last night we had together and at least i put my effort in, and i see where you're focus was....whether yiu read this or not makes no difference to me its clear you don't have a reason to love me now that you have lost weight and manipulated and fooled everyone and molded my dislikes into looking like it was always my fault so i apologized and admitted the truths I had.. you can tell them about the other stuff I omitted you did and yiu can tell them what yiu think i did what you think i do and what you think i am thinking. But its here and if you di read this im surprised you made it this far. But after the end of this day you have used up every chance i gave you. How is asking questions controlling? How is honestly controlling? How is telling people what we both did manipulative? How is correcting people when new evidence or information has surfaced and proof feeding them bs? Or sharing my views beliefs and experiences BS? How was making suggestions or offering help controlling, but turning around and 4 other people offer, advise, suggest, or demand, and its considerate? I backed your decisions whether with or against. Yet when taking a step to my well being or improvement you fight it like I'm not allowed. So i asked her to change her last name back even though in the beginning she didnt want mine because her parents input, mainly so she wouldn't have to change it when I being of hispanic and native descent are abusive, but in my experiences it was always theirs that did the abuse to loved ones. Its funny how any suggestions i made or input or experience i had was insignificant to their disability checks and other type of non earned income. Don't even get me started on the remarks her father would make about her or to her on topics... And I'm also going to back track to our first seperation after marriage 3 months in she was already back in contact with previous relations or friends she kept secret and arranging hang outs or video calls, and gets mad when an old acquaintance who babysat for me before her asks if she is ok to meet her and have a play date for our children since they are close in age and familiar with another and after asking for approval and getting a yes from my stbxw so we could go out and drink a couple nights here or there and she freaks out saying I was having secret chats and that she was making sure work didn't text or call me on social media? But then always refused her phone after going through mine to find nothing and would wipe it clean clean and hand it over saying I should trust her but she had back up on and had been having multiple convos with people who wanted to help but would possibly get a sexual reward from the rumors ppl spread about her....and said I did it that I invaded her privacy. And yet recently I was asked by a random meme dealer on social media if single and I replied it's complicated and shot her down and removed her and many others due to after 4 months being welcomed back home by wife yet 5 nights later after seeing a generic aimed comment reply dove deeper assuming and accusing after being told the truth, and then clearing her devices for 3 nights and still denied already seen proof if her having same convos with people up till that night and some even more sexual in nature and to things id show her and she'd reply stupid or nasty or perverted or immature but was laughing it up and commenting very explicit things while I laid next to her and eventually moved to the couches or floor...
With Love From, A Man You Married/Buried M With Thanks From The Guy Who I Become L
submitted by maggot0817 to BPD [link] [comments]


2020.10.14 07:35 maggot0817 First post lemme have it mobile and mind everywhere

So heres my summary of k,
when we met she would brag and defend about all her past relations, flings and admirers would blow her up non stop and she would text everyone of them back and brag and joke to her friends about how she was just using them, and this is while she was in a relationship. Also had me laying with her in her bed with her almost nightly. I have never been one to come between a relationship unless ut was abusive, but she just wanted attention. So after we start dating the first time i bring my best friend who wanted to sleep with her as well and i hadn't told him we were dating she went from giving me oral for 4 seconds to hanging her ass out the window for others to see to grinding and kissing on my vest friend and called me controlling and jealous. So i told her she is grown and can make her own decisions i wasnt gonna argue and went to bed. Her friends had to tell him and after he found out he quickly pushed her aside.... then the night wr broke up she tried sleeping 2 friends and the neighbor, after we did our thing and ended up going all the way.....she didnt admit to it for weeks and laughed about it 3 days later when i had already known and it wasn't an apology either and she finished it by slapping me and saying she will still fuck the neighbor....
fast forward shes constantly leading guys on to get attention and still telling me she wants to be with me all the while after a loss i had in my family she only texted once asking what happened and what was on the note, and if i got any money from it to get a car to go visit her outta state. So while out of state she is entertaining her life crush idk but rotating me and him and telling me we are together while i wanted to not be unless exclusively how she demanded, throwing fits over ex fiance contacting when we have a child together and never anything more except i stayed to help her get situated for 1 month at her new place and to see daughter1 and stepdaughter3 while she worked days and i worked nights mainly.
While gone each time shes expecting good morning night day sweet dreams, etc etc, proof I'm not with other girls anywhere near, and long paragraph love texts and heartfelt messages, via sms, vm, vc, and after telling her family her exaggerated victimized side of the story and telling me threats and hate from her family wants me to drive x hrs away to see her for 2 hours because she is under lock and key unless with her family....oh and i rarely got any of those expected letters she demanded and if i didnt she'd complain and ignore me, so they started coming less and less over the years. Always seemed the less attention I gave the more it was craved due to work, sleeping, spending time with family, distance, or avoidance.
So she moves back in and drops her crush but now hes trying to be with her and shes torn and laughing it off all the while ex's are calling her and she has full on conversation until saying shes with someone 5 mins later while right beside me....no big deal im not jealous type, but she would get mad that would have male friends come over and would talk shit to them and run them off and say she hated them, then when we fought over stuff she held in until someone else pissed her off enough or she assumed something happened between me and another female shed flip to im abusive and controlling and crazy pressing every burton i had with a smile and turning friends and family against me forcing me out on the street or at a place where my friend didnt allow her to go.... So we get our own place some issues happen over visitation of my daughter, and her brother moving in and being a total mooch making everything worse yet defended him who was 19 yrs old and babied him and chose his side over mine, but demanded I tell him what she thought and they were just so babied and pampered its ridiculous, so she kicks me out and then 2 days later gets picked up and taken back to her home town for 3 months..... then after asking her not ri come back and begging her to stay there and keep it as just acquaintances she shows up because she wants to be free again, and after 3 weeks we return to the dark side she hides from her family. For 8 months its back and forth from i love you i hate you...
fast forward to wedding after more similar scenarios 10 times worse, we fight our honeymoon night....oh and every birthday i had or will have, and special occasions, she wants a divorce 3 months later and rinse wash repeat for 5 years+ she wants a baby to save marriage somehow and during a big disagreement, 2 weeks later pregnant,....second pregnancy after not being on board wanting financial stability first and other priorities she times and plans the conception and baby #2 on the way. Nothing against ny children snd ni regrets. Find out bc and child birth showed positive test results for mental disorders and at a time i was monogamous for 4 years almost and very little sexual activity due to opposing shift schedules, and you out and about during recent break up and me being out of state you catch an sti/std....
Imagine asking the person who begged you to marry her have kids settle down and be patient supposedly listen to your perspective just to twist it into the exact opposite saying that im lying she knows what I think what I do but if told once by anyone else something negative about me its 1000000000% true no doubt no proof needed why would someone lie? And constantly accused and neglected emotionally, sexually, intimately, lovingly, and only playfully hit or picked on and sexually teased, and constantly telling myself and others she is this way, this view, expects only this, is happy, is adventurous, and spontaneous, and turns around to be rhe exact opposite when alone without the facade, and will specifically do exactly told what I find disrespectful, refused to fight for the relationship and fought more to be right when proven wrong or when treated the same way i was getting, with double standards, stated i am not equal to the freedom a woman gets that i pay bills do chores when home and cater to her every need and when she would attempt to do what i requested or needed or desired put 3 seconds of effort to turn around and snap that i need to appreciate her effort, and that i expect to much, when i bent over backwards to please her and satisfy her and fought for her, but because after 8 years of no meaningful romantic gestures or equality I stayed in the other room playing games while she slept alone after complaining i put effort into doing something so she wouldn't and demanded i do it her way, would be her punching bag for mental issues and expect me to read her mind. When asking her a simple question of her preference having small fights over identity issues or that im being nosey and when voicing my issues calmly and composed met with self loathe and flight responses and fighting me to admit I want out and pushing me so hard to do until it got to the point of ger being brligerant abd violent forcing me out or to take some space... And to find out that for 8 years those close family friends and cousins and childhood besties are already trying to make it more 1 week after i left her for her demanding to know what I expect from her and turn around and do the opposite and for not being able to answer a question honestly because if your past is more important than what we put in while you chose to lie and keep them secret and be trophy wife by my side and turn around and be ms life if the party when not in ny presence to be still talking to me after like we never split all the while entertaining those cousins and childhood friends who have always been there for you and didnt just want sex from her....
but if all i wanted was sex why would i choose a woman who just lays on her back, does it maybe once a week if im home and who rushes the process because its a chore and the way you initiated it was by saying come here close the door hurry up so i can go to bed and if taking more than 10 or 15 mins which was rarely due to 8 years of quickies pretty much being told to finish or to take care of myself but complain when i would try to and say it hurt your feelings that i am inconsiderate, and tell me all these preferences you enjoy or have and expect me to just do it right the first time without any communication until after or angered and after going 2 or 3 or more weeks without being loved on by a woman who would hug and conversate with every man anywhere when alone whether disrespectful or not but its not okay for me to go to a strip club after nc for 2 weeks and being kicked out of the home i pay for while you run around our state free as a bird.... And during this time link with ex's and past flings and missed encounters and then want the stability back after some hardship and expect me to be fine after your infidelity, dishonesty, narcissism, self victimizing, bashing, gaslighting, and still not once have you apologized, but only bring up how after your screw ups and Saying thats fine and no big deal i do it at a fraction of the severity and its game over double standards, biased, and when asking you how come its ok for you to do something but im not at equal footing? Always ditching my family gatherings or completely ignoring to spend time at hers so she can try to do everything for everything man woman and child and complain to everyone that im not helping yiu enough, even after having them over to our place i was cast out ignored and my daughteyour step daughter as well? But not one if them helped you the way you did....but when you need money sure no prob but it always came out of ny wallet. You made last minute plans and planned to enjoy it step by step moment by moment but constantly changed your decisions and had to be in control of all the chaos while i improvised every step to suit your choice and when counseled otherwise and correct by me was a fight to follow. I spent years lifting you up keeping your head above water all the while you pushed on mine to have 6 extra inches so people could admire your appearance. I felt you were ashamed you married me, i felt that after u seen you at your worst you thought you couldn't trust me and chose to lie because i didn't deserve your time to explain your side or your truths. I spent 8 years telling almost everyone you were so right about the horrible person i am....was..... because after this last birthday i experienced it was only about you.....the one day about me specifically....i learned my lesson....i learned i am horrible.....but not because of what you lied or exaggerated or assumed and what was rumored I did to you....but because i let myself continue to be lead on and filled with hopes of experiencing a love from a lover who never believed a word I said and would use our children or an emergency to get me for support in her wants and short comings, because burning those bridges and crying rivers left her stranded.
I told you im tired of fighting with you. I told you this time you have to fight for me. I told you that I will no longer fight for you or with you until you do this and if you do you, you and I need to fight everyone else who comes between our family we made alone. It's been 2 months now and its been 2 weeks i havent heard from you or seen our children we share since you changed plans that day from staying home with them to going out while they were sick putting them at risk, after you caused them to get sick. But this is the reason why I became the way i did. Yes i know drop the past its behind you but you never changed. You still live there and just found new apps and ways to be the real you. You can say u cheated or lied and i guess yeah it was unfaithful to conversate at a bar with strippers or women, to buy them drinks, but i never made it more than that because all i could think about was how they aren't you and never will be. Asking why would a woman do this if i do this only to hear its not normal that it's covering hidden agenda or details to prevent a fight. Remember the time you broke up with me because i changed body wash/shampoo to a better balanced one for my compositions.... remember when you left because you hadn't seen your mother in 2 months? Remember when you sharted and i was the last ti find out? Remember when you were disrespectful and arrogant and rude or aggressive and bossy and when offended back became angry at me when i wasn't present? Remember when you start acting crazy and look bad in public and decide its my fault because i wasnt controlling enough to stop you? Remember when you said I deserved to lose the person who passed away? Remember when i told you my feelings for the first time and you told everyone you knew? Remember when I posted a meme with you not understanding it and you left me? Remember when you accused me if cheating and you were entertaining multiple people? Remember when you said i had addictions, while you endulged any possible? Remember when you brought up people from my past who never came around at all, yet you had every circle yours were in minus them? Remember when thats all you can do us remember? But you have a short memory so you'll move on quick like how you did with your ex to me. Remember every dream you had of me was so negative yet the ones you are with now they were the ones who you held close ....how many dreams did you abuse and mistreat me over? 5, 6, 7, maybe 16ish? You have your mind made up from my perspective.
You know i am very open minded, and have nothing but love for you. But your secrets are what killed our marriage. I was honest when asked specifically about topics or situations. I answered i explained, i gave you my truths. You deflect and avoid and accuse and alter the focus. The only people I didnt appreciate you talking to were ones who has sexual feelings for you or more than platonic, but i guess that was everyone and you couldn't handle the addiction to it over our marriage so you pushed and twisted so i would get to an image you could blame...i know what i did i apologized for the actions i was guilty of and I confessed my situations you heard otherwise.
So i gave you everything you asked for and its still not enough while you gave me the opposite of my wants and im asking to much. This is why I warned you about marriage and a real relationship not the fwb and 1 or 2 month flings....i told you if i gave it my all i expected you to do the same and you made the same vows at our wedding and i showed up but it wasnt me you wanted that day, it wasnt eternity or growth, or a commitment to be selfless for once. It was just another day meant to be about you. I gave it my all with your downs, and apparently it wasnt enough, apparently my words and actions meant less than anyone else in the universe, and i do not qualify for equality. This is the last time you'll ever get this side of me. The night before you left to visit family and party is the last night we had together and at least i put my effort in, and i see where you're focus was....whether yiu read this or not makes no difference to me its clear you don't have a reason to love me now that you have lost weight and manipulated and fooled everyone and molded my dislikes into looking like it was always my fault so i apologized and admitted the truths I had.. you can tell them about the other stuff I omitted you did and yiu can tell them what yiu think i did what you think i do and what you think i am thinking. But its here and if you di read this im surprised you made it this far. But after the end of this day you have used up every chance i gave you. How is asking questions controlling? How is honestly controlling? How is telling people what we both did manipulative? How is correcting people when new evidence or information has surfaced and proof feeding them bs? Or sharing my views beliefs and experiences BS? How was making suggestions or offering help controlling, but turning around and 4 other people offer, advise, suggest, or demand, and its considerate? I backed your decisions whether with or against. Yet when taking a step to my well being or improvement you fight it like I'm not allowed. So i asked her to change her last name back even though in the beginning she didnt want mine because her parents input, mainly so she wouldn't have to change it when I being of hispanic and native descent are abusive, but in my experiences it was always theirs that did the abuse to loved ones. Its funny how any suggestions i made or input or experience i had was insignificant to their disability checks and other type of non earned income. Don't even get me started on the remarks her father would make about her or to her on topics... And I'm also going to back track to our first seperation after marriage 3 months in she was already back in contact with previous relations or friends she kept secret and arranging hang outs or video calls, and gets mad when an old acquaintance who babysat for me before her asks if she is ok to meet her and have a play date for our children since they are close in age and familiar with another and after asking for approval and getting a yes from my stbxw so we could go out and drink a couple nights here or there and she freaks out saying I was having secret chats and that she was making sure work didn't text or call me on social media? But then always refused her phone after going through mine to find nothing and would wipe it clean clean and hand it over saying I should trust her but she had back up on and had been having multiple convos with people who wanted to help but would possibly get a sexual reward from the rumors ppl spread about her....and said I did it that I invaded her privacy. And yet recently I was asked by a random meme dealer on social media if single and I replied it's complicated and shot her down and removed her and many others due to after 4 months being welcomed back home by wife yet 5 nights later after seeing a generic aimed comment reply dove deeper assuming and accusing after being told the truth, and then clearing her devices for 3 nights and still denied already seen proof if her having same convos with people up till that night and some even more sexual in nature and to things id show her and she'd reply stupid or nasty or perverted or immature but was laughing it up and commenting very explicit things while I laid next to her and eventually moved to the couches or floor...
With Love From, A Man You Married/Buried M With Thanks From The Guy Who I Become L
submitted by maggot0817 to Divorce [link] [comments]


2020.10.14 07:32 maggot0817 Hidden sex public

So heres my summary of k,
when we met she would brag and defend about all her past relations, flings and admirers would blow her up non stop and she would text everyone of them back and brag and joke to her friends about how she was just using them, and this is while she was in a relationship. Also had me laying with her in her bed with her almost nightly. I have never been one to come between a relationship unless ut was abusive, but she just wanted attention. So after we start dating the first time i bring my best friend who wanted to sleep with her as well and i hadn't told him we were dating she went from giving me oral for 4 seconds to hanging her ass out the window for others to see to grinding and kissing on my vest friend and called me controlling and jealous. So i told her she is grown and can make her own decisions i wasnt gonna argue and went to bed. Her friends had to tell him and after he found out he quickly pushed her aside.... then the night wr broke up she tried sleeping 2 friends and the neighbor, after we did our thing and ended up going all the way.....she didnt admit to it for weeks and laughed about it 3 days later when i had already known and it wasn't an apology either and she finished it by slapping me and saying she will still fuck the neighbor....
fast forward shes constantly leading guys on to get attention and still telling me she wants to be with me all the while after a loss i had in my family she only texted once asking what happened and what was on the note, and if i got any money from it to get a car to go visit her outta state. So while out of state she is entertaining her life crush idk but rotating me and him and telling me we are together while i wanted to not be unless exclusively how she demanded, throwing fits over ex fiance contacting when we have a child together and never anything more except i stayed to help her get situated for 1 month at her new place and to see daughter1 and stepdaughter3 while she worked days and i worked nights mainly.
While gone each time shes expecting good morning night day sweet dreams, etc etc, proof I'm not with other girls anywhere near, and long paragraph love texts and heartfelt messages, via sms, vm, vc, and after telling her family her exaggerated victimized side of the story and telling me threats and hate from her family wants me to drive x hrs away to see her for 2 hours because she is under lock and key unless with her family....oh and i rarely got any of those expected letters she demanded and if i didnt she'd complain and ignore me, so they started coming less and less over the years. Always seemed the less attention I gave the more it was craved due to work, sleeping, spending time with family, distance, or avoidance.
So she moves back in and drops her crush but now hes trying to be with her and shes torn and laughing it off all the while ex's are calling her and she has full on conversation until saying shes with someone 5 mins later while right beside me....no big deal im not jealous type, but she would get mad that would have male friends come over and would talk shit to them and run them off and say she hated them, then when we fought over stuff she held in until someone else pissed her off enough or she assumed something happened between me and another female shed flip to im abusive and controlling and crazy pressing every burton i had with a smile and turning friends and family against me forcing me out on the street or at a place where my friend didnt allow her to go.... So we get our own place some issues happen over visitation of my daughter, and her brother moving in and being a total mooch making everything worse yet defended him who was 19 yrs old and babied him and chose his side over mine, but demanded I tell him what she thought and they were just so babied and pampered its ridiculous, so she kicks me out and then 2 days later gets picked up and taken back to her home town for 3 months..... then after asking her not ri come back and begging her to stay there and keep it as just acquaintances she shows up because she wants to be free again, and after 3 weeks we return to the dark side she hides from her family. For 8 months its back and forth from i love you i hate you...
fast forward to wedding after more similar scenarios 10 times worse, we fight our honeymoon night....oh and every birthday i had or will have, and special occasions, she wants a divorce 3 months later and rinse wash repeat for 5 years+ she wants a baby to save marriage somehow and during a big disagreement, 2 weeks later pregnant,....second pregnancy after not being on board wanting financial stability first and other priorities she times and plans the conception and baby #2 on the way. Nothing against ny children snd ni regrets. Find out bc and child birth showed positive test results for mental disorders and at a time i was monogamous for 4 years almost and very little sexual activity due to opposing shift schedules, and you out and about during recent break up and me being out of state you catch an sti/std....
Imagine asking the person who begged you to marry her have kids settle down and be patient supposedly listen to your perspective just to twist it into the exact opposite saying that im lying she knows what I think what I do but if told once by anyone else something negative about me its 1000000000% true no doubt no proof needed why would someone lie? And constantly accused and neglected emotionally, sexually, intimately, lovingly, and only playfully hit or picked on and sexually teased, and constantly telling myself and others she is this way, this view, expects only this, is happy, is adventurous, and spontaneous, and turns around to be rhe exact opposite when alone without the facade, and will specifically do exactly told what I find disrespectful, refused to fight for the relationship and fought more to be right when proven wrong or when treated the same way i was getting, with double standards, stated i am not equal to the freedom a woman gets that i pay bills do chores when home and cater to her every need and when she would attempt to do what i requested or needed or desired put 3 seconds of effort to turn around and snap that i need to appreciate her effort, and that i expect to much, when i bent over backwards to please her and satisfy her and fought for her, but because after 8 years of no meaningful romantic gestures or equality I stayed in the other room playing games while she slept alone after complaining i put effort into doing something so she wouldn't and demanded i do it her way, would be her punching bag for mental issues and expect me to read her mind. When asking her a simple question of her preference having small fights over identity issues or that im being nosey and when voicing my issues calmly and composed met with self loathe and flight responses and fighting me to admit I want out and pushing me so hard to do until it got to the point of ger being brligerant abd violent forcing me out or to take some space... And to find out that for 8 years those close family friends and cousins and childhood besties are already trying to make it more 1 week after i left her for her demanding to know what I expect from her and turn around and do the opposite and for not being able to answer a question honestly because if your past is more important than what we put in while you chose to lie and keep them secret and be trophy wife by my side and turn around and be ms life if the party when not in ny presence to be still talking to me after like we never split all the while entertaining those cousins and childhood friends who have always been there for you and didnt just want sex from her....
but if all i wanted was sex why would i choose a woman who just lays on her back, does it maybe once a week if im home and who rushes the process because its a chore and the way you initiated it was by saying come here close the door hurry up so i can go to bed and if taking more than 10 or 15 mins which was rarely due to 8 years of quickies pretty much being told to finish or to take care of myself but complain when i would try to and say it hurt your feelings that i am inconsiderate, and tell me all these preferences you enjoy or have and expect me to just do it right the first time without any communication until after or angered and after going 2 or 3 or more weeks without being loved on by a woman who would hug and conversate with every man anywhere when alone whether disrespectful or not but its not okay for me to go to a strip club after nc for 2 weeks and being kicked out of the home i pay for while you run around our state free as a bird.... And during this time link with ex's and past flings and missed encounters and then want the stability back after some hardship and expect me to be fine after your infidelity, dishonesty, narcissism, self victimizing, bashing, gaslighting, and still not once have you apologized, but only bring up how after your screw ups and Saying thats fine and no big deal i do it at a fraction of the severity and its game over double standards, biased, and when asking you how come its ok for you to do something but im not at equal footing? Always ditching my family gatherings or completely ignoring to spend time at hers so she can try to do everything for everything man woman and child and complain to everyone that im not helping yiu enough, even after having them over to our place i was cast out ignored and my daughteyour step daughter as well? But not one if them helped you the way you did....but when you need money sure no prob but it always came out of ny wallet. You made last minute plans and planned to enjoy it step by step moment by moment but constantly changed your decisions and had to be in control of all the chaos while i improvised every step to suit your choice and when counseled otherwise and correct by me was a fight to follow. I spent years lifting you up keeping your head above water all the while you pushed on mine to have 6 extra inches so people could admire your appearance. I felt you were ashamed you married me, i felt that after u seen you at your worst you thought you couldn't trust me and chose to lie because i didn't deserve your time to explain your side or your truths. I spent 8 years telling almost everyone you were so right about the horrible person i am....was..... because after this last birthday i experienced it was only about you.....the one day about me specifically....i learned my lesson....i learned i am horrible.....but not because of what you lied or exaggerated or assumed and what was rumored I did to you....but because i let myself continue to be lead on and filled with hopes of experiencing a love from a lover who never believed a word I said and would use our children or an emergency to get me for support in her wants and short comings, because burning those bridges and crying rivers left her stranded.
I told you im tired of fighting with you. I told you this time you have to fight for me. I told you that I will no longer fight for you or with you until you do this and if you do you, you and I need to fight everyone else who comes between our family we made alone. It's been 2 months now and its been 2 weeks i havent heard from you or seen our children we share since you changed plans that day from staying home with them to going out while they were sick putting them at risk, after you caused them to get sick. But this is the reason why I became the way i did. Yes i know drop the past its behind you but you never changed. You still live there and just found new apps and ways to be the real you. You can say u cheated or lied and i guess yeah it was unfaithful to conversate at a bar with strippers or women, to buy them drinks, but i never made it more than that because all i could think about was how they aren't you and never will be. Asking why would a woman do this if i do this only to hear its not normal that it's covering hidden agenda or details to prevent a fight. Remember the time you broke up with me because i changed body wash/shampoo to a better balanced one for my compositions.... remember when you left because you hadn't seen your mother in 2 months? Remember when you sharted and i was the last ti find out? Remember when you were disrespectful and arrogant and rude or aggressive and bossy and when offended back became angry at me when i wasn't present? Remember when you start acting crazy and look bad in public and decide its my fault because i wasnt controlling enough to stop you? Remember when you said I deserved to lose the person who passed away? Remember when i told you my feelings for the first time and you told everyone you knew? Remember when I posted a meme with you not understanding it and you left me? Remember when you accused me if cheating and you were entertaining multiple people? Remember when you said i had addictions, while you endulged any possible? Remember when you brought up people from my past who never came around at all, yet you had every circle yours were in minus them? Remember when thats all you can do us remember? But you have a short memory so you'll move on quick like how you did with your ex to me. Remember every dream you had of me was so negative yet the ones you are with now they were the ones who you held close ....how many dreams did you abuse and mistreat me over? 5, 6, 7, maybe 16ish? You have your mind made up from my perspective.
You know i am very open minded, and have nothing but love for you. But your secrets are what killed our marriage. I was honest when asked specifically about topics or situations. I answered i explained, i gave you my truths. You deflect and avoid and accuse and alter the focus. The only people I didnt appreciate you talking to were ones who has sexual feelings for you or more than platonic, but i guess that was everyone and you couldn't handle the addiction to it over our marriage so you pushed and twisted so i would get to an image you could blame...i know what i did i apologized for the actions i was guilty of and I confessed my situations you heard otherwise.
So i gave you everything you asked for and its still not enough while you gave me the opposite of my wants and im asking to much. This is why I warned you about marriage and a real relationship not the fwb and 1 or 2 month flings....i told you if i gave it my all i expected you to do the same and you made the same vows at our wedding and i showed up but it wasnt me you wanted that day, it wasnt eternity or growth, or a commitment to be selfless for once. It was just another day meant to be about you. I gave it my all with your downs, and apparently it wasnt enough, apparently my words and actions meant less than anyone else in the universe, and i do not qualify for equality. This is the last time you'll ever get this side of me. The night before you left to visit family and party is the last night we had together and at least i put my effort in, and i see where you're focus was....whether yiu read this or not makes no difference to me its clear you don't have a reason to love me now that you have lost weight and manipulated and fooled everyone and molded my dislikes into looking like it was always my fault so i apologized and admitted the truths I had.. you can tell them about the other stuff I omitted you did and yiu can tell them what yiu think i did what you think i do and what you think i am thinking. But its here and if you di read this im surprised you made it this far. But after the end of this day you have used up every chance i gave you. How is asking questions controlling? How is honestly controlling? How is telling people what we both did manipulative? How is correcting people when new evidence or information has surfaced and proof feeding them bs? Or sharing my views beliefs and experiences BS? How was making suggestions or offering help controlling, but turning around and 4 other people offer, advise, suggest, or demand, and its considerate? I backed your decisions whether with or against. Yet when taking a step to my well being or improvement you fight it like I'm not allowed. So i asked her to change her last name back even though in the beginning she didnt want mine because her parents input, mainly so she wouldn't have to change it when I being of hispanic and native descent are abusive, but in my experiences it was always theirs that did the abuse to loved ones. Its funny how any suggestions i made or input or experience i had was insignificant to their disability checks and other type of non earned income. Don't even get me started on the remarks her father would make about her or to her on topics... And I'm also going to back track to our first seperation after marriage 3 months in she was already back in contact with previous relations or friends she kept secret and arranging hang outs or video calls, and gets mad when an old acquaintance who babysat for me before her asks if she is ok to meet her and have a play date for our children since they are close in age and familiar with another and after asking for approval and getting a yes from my stbxw so we could go out and drink a couple nights here or there and she freaks out saying I was having secret chats and that she was making sure work didn't text or call me on social media? But then always refused her phone after going through mine to find nothing and would wipe it clean clean and hand it over saying I should trust her but she had back up on and had been having multiple convos with people who wanted to help but would possibly get a sexual reward from the rumors ppl spread about her....and said I did it that I invaded her privacy. And yet recently I was asked by a random meme dealer on social media if single and I replied it's complicated and shot her down and removed her and many others due to after 4 months being welcomed back home by wife yet 5 nights later after seeing a generic aimed comment reply dove deeper assuming and accusing after being told the truth, and then clearing her devices for 3 nights and still denied already seen proof if her having same convos with people up till that night and some even more sexual in nature and to things id show her and she'd reply stupid or nasty or perverted or immature but was laughing it up and commenting very explicit things while I laid next to her and eventually moved to the couches or floor...
With Love From, A Man You Married/Buried M With Thanks From The Guy Who I Become L
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