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(Continued from Part 1)
The Experts: Who are these people and what are their qualifications? Here is some background information on the consulted child sexual abuse experts who testified to JonBenet's prior abuse:
Andrew P. Sirotnak, MD, FAAP*
Dr. Sirotnak graduated with a MD from Thomas Jefferson University in 1989 and completed his residency in the Child Abuse Pediatrics program. From 1992-1994 he was the Pediatrics Chief Resident and Fellow in Child Abuse Pediatrics at the University of Colorado School of Medicine.
At the time of his involvement in the Ramsey case, he was the Director of the Child Protection Team at Children's Hospital Colorado and a professor in the Department of Pediatrics at the University of Colorado School of Medicine, positions which he still holds today.
His work and research has been published in: Child Abuse & Neglect, Child Maltreatment, Journal of Pediatric Surgery, Pediatric Clinics of North America, Clinical Pediatric Emergency Medicine, Pediatric Surgery International, Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, and The Journal of Pediatrics. He co-authored a chapter on child sexual abuse in the textbook Berman's Pediatric Decision Making (5th ed.) and is one of the editors of the textbook Child Abuse: Medical Diagnosis and Management (4th ed.) which was released in 2019.

*Fellow of the American Academy of Pediatrics
Richard D. Krugman, MD, FAAP
Dr. Krugman graduated with a BA in Biology/Biological Sciences from Princeton University in 1963 and a MD from NYU School of Medicine/Sackler Institute of Graduate Biomedical Sciences in 1968. He completed his specialty residency training in the Pediatrics Residency Program at the University of Colorado School of Medicine in 1971.
From 1981-1992, he served as Director of the Kempe National Center for Prevention and Treatment of Child Abuse at the UC School of Medicine and was appointed to the U.S. Advisory Board of Child Abuse and Neglect in 1989, serving as Chair from 1989-1991. He is currently a Distinguished Professor in Pediatrics-Child Abuse and Neglect at UC School of Medicine and is regarded as one of the nation's leading experts on the subject of child abuse and neglect. In January 2018, Dr. Krugman co-founded the National Foundation to End Child Abuse and Neglect.
Dr. Krugman served as editor-in-chief of Child Abuse and Neglect: the International Journal from 1986-2001. He has authored over 120 papers in journals such as Child Abuse & Neglect, International Journal on Child Maltreatment, Pediatric Clinics of North America, Pediatrics and Adolescent Medicine, and others.
He is co-editor of the books The Battered Child (5th ed.), Handbook of Child Maltreatment, National Systems of Child Protection: Understanding the International Variability and Context for Developing Policy and Practice, and C. Henry Kempe: A 50 Year Legacy to the Field of Child Abuse and Neglect.
James A. Monteleone, MD
Dr. Monteleone graduated with a BA in education from the University of Illinois and a MD from the Saint Louis University School of Medicine in 1962. After completing his residency he served as a pediatrics instructor at Northwestern University School of Medicine and as a physician at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago. In 1967 he joined the faculty at SLU as a professor of pediatrics and gynecology. He also practiced at Cardinal Glennon Children's hospital for over 34 years where he served as Director of the Division of Child Protection. He was regarded as an expert on child physical and sexual abuse and neglect.
From his obituary at
Dr. James Monteleone became an outspoken advocate for abused children, after seeing his first case of child abuse during his residency at Cardinal Glennon in 1962. He was a founding member of one of the nation’s first child abuse management committees and the first sexual abuse management committee, both formed at Cardinal Glennon shortly after the medical community recognized child abuse as battered baby syndrome.
In his years of practice, Dr. Monteleone witnessed more than 7,000 cases of child abuse.
In 1989, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services honored Dr. Monteleone with the Commissioner’s Award for Outstanding Leadership and Service in the Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect. He was the author of Recognition of Child Abuse for the Mandated Reporter and A Parent’s and Teacher’s Handbook on Identifying and Preventing Child Abuse, among other work on the subject.
Dr. Monteleone died on February 10, 2020 at the age of 87.
Valerie J. Rao, MD
A native of Madras, South India, Dr. Rao studied Zoology at Stella Maris College in Chennai. She graduated with a Bachelor of Medicine and Bachelor of Surgery from St. John’s Medical School at Bangalore University in 1971, after which she went to the US to complete a five year residency training program in clinical, anatomic, and forensic pathology.
At the time of her involvement on the Ramsey case, Dr. Rao was an associate medical examiner at the Miami-Dade County Medical Examiner's Office where she had been since 1981. She is noted for specializing in dealing with sexual assault victims, particularly children. In Miami she worked at the Rape Treatment Center at Jackson Memorial Hospital for 18 years doing forensic evaluations in cases of sexual assault and child abuse.
Dr. Rao has worked as a medical examiner in the states of Arizona, Missouri, and Florida and has taught courses in Pathology and Anatomic Sciences at University of Missouri School of Medicine. She served as Chief Medical Examiner for District 4 in Jacksonville Florida since 2011, a position from which she retired at the end of 2019.
Dr. Rao's research has been published in Journal of Forensic Sciences and The American Journal of Forensic Medicine and Pathology. She co-authored the books An Atlas of Forensic Pathology, Practical Forensic Pathology, and also co-wrote the chapter "Sexual Battery Investigation" in the book Forensic Pathology: Principles and Practice.
John J. McCann, MD, FAAP
Dr. McCann recieved his MD from University of Michigan's Medical School in 1957. After serving two years in the Navy as the base pediatrician in Annapolis Maryland, he joined the faculty at University of Washington and was appointed Chief of Pediatrics at Harborview Medical Center. McCann's colleague at Harborview was fellow pediatrician Dr. Shirley Anderson, an early pioneer in the field of medical assessment of sexual abuse. Harborview had one of the first hospital based programs for sexual assault and abuse evaluations in the country and Dr. Anderson served as its first director. Working alongside Dr. Anderson is how Dr. McCann developed an interest in child abuse evaluation.
Dr. McCann then moved to California to help develop a primary care training program for the Department of Pediatrics at University of California, San Francisco. While at the university-affiliated Valley Medical Center, McCann led research on a topic about which very little was known at the time: the anogenital anatomy of non-abused children. He and his team also conducted research and published articles on the healing of genital injuries, the use of colposcopes in evaluating prepubertal and adolescent girls for suspected sexual abuse, and developed the multi-method evaluation approach that is now used throughout the world.
At the time of his work on the Ramsey case, Dr. McCann was Clinical Professor of Pediatrics and the Medical Director of the Child Protection Center at the University of California, Davis Medical Center in Sacramento, California. He also served as Chairman of the American Professional Society Against Child Abuse's (APSAC) Committee on the Interpretation of Anal/Genital Findings in Child Sexual Abuse. At UC Davis he continued his research in the healing process of anal/genital injuries and also wrote the evaluation guidelines and protocols for reporting child sexual abuse in the state of California.
Dr. McCann established the standards for what is considered normal and abnormal in child and adolescent genital examinations. He has conducted or supervised medical evaluations of over 10,000 child sexual abuse victims and is "widely regarded nationally and internationally as a master anatomic diagnostician in the field.*" He regularly gave seminars to physicians and medical examiners on how to recognize abuse and testified in criminal trials for the defense where misinterpreted genital findings had led to false allegations of sexual abuse. He was committed to and advocated accuracy and integrity in medical evaluations to prevent false allegations against parents or caretakers.
He has authored numerous journal articles on the genital findings of both abused and non-abused children as well as textbooks such as The Anatomy of Child and Adolescent Sexual Abuse: A CD-ROM Atlas/Reference and Color Atlas of Child Sexual Abuse. His research continues to be used today in training programs for child abuse education.
Responses to dissenting opinions I'm aware of only one medical expert opinion that could be considered a dissenting opinion.
Werner Spitz, MD
Dr. Spitz was consulted by the police and coroner's office to review the vaginal injury evidence, including tissue slides and photographs, to help determine when in relation to JonBenet's death the acute vaginal injury took place. He concluded that it was inflicted very near or concurrent with the time of death. In his opinion the head blow came first, rendering JonBenet unconconscious, and the vaginal assault and strangulation which was inflicted some time later was staging. He said he saw "no clear indication of prior penetration," believing that the retracted and shriveled hymen could be explained by the acute assault.
Three things to keep in mind is that:
1) Spitz wasn't tasked to determine if there was prior vaginal trauma. His focus was on the sequence and timing of JonBenet's injuries including the acute vaginal trauma. Since he believed the acute injury was a staged sexual assault meant to cover up the fatal head blow, the issue of prior sexual abuse is not especially pertinent in his theory.
2) Spitz is not a specialist in child sexual abuse, pediatric anogenital anatomy, or the healing morphology of the genital injuries of prepubertal children.
3) He does not say there was no prior penetration, rather "no clear indication of prior penetration," which hints at reservation or uncertainty.
Responses to strawman arguments presented as dissenting opinions Dr. Francesco Beuf, MD, FAAP
JonBenet's pediatrician said he saw no evidence of sexual abuse during the time he treated her as a patient. From his letter to Boulder Police:
My office treated JonBenet Ramsey from March, 1993 through December, 1996. Throughout this period, there has been absolutely no evidence of abuse of any kind.
In an interview with Paula Woodward, when asked if he thought JonBenet was sexually abused, he stated:
I do not think she was sexually abused. I am convinced she wasn't sexually abused. [source]
Note that he does not deny that she was sexually abused, because he cannot deny it. As he did not suspect any abuse, Dr. Beuf did not evaluate JonBenet for sexual abuse nor conduct a genital examination for sexual abuse. It's not something he ever clinically assessed or ruled out, therefore, he can say only that he did not see evidence or signs of abuse or that he doesn't believe she was abused. That is not the same as stating the medical opinion that she was not abused.
When we talk about the evidence of prior sexual abuse, we are referring to the genital findings, particularly of the hymen, observed at JonBenet's autopsy. By his own admission, Beuf never examined JonBenet's hymen. He did not see the genital findings from the autopsy. He did not see the prior hymenal injury that the experts describe. His opinion that JonBenet was not sexually abused is based on clinical history and social/familial history as provided to him by her parent, not the anatomical evidence. Dr. Beuf's opinion does not even address the evidence, much less refute it.
Michael Dobersen, MD
This statement by Dr. Dobersen from a 2006 article sometimes gets cited as a dissenting medical opinion:
[On the question of whether the autopsy findings indicated chronic abuse] "Arapahoe County Coroner Dr. Michael Doberson says you would need more information before you could come to any conclusion.
This is not a dissenting opinion. Dr. Dobersen is declining to give an opinion.
Thomas Henry, MD
In the 1998 documentary JonBenet's America, this statement by Denver medical examiner Dr. Thomas Henry is presented as a rebuttal to the evidence of prior abuse:
From what is noted in the autopsy report, there is no evidence of injury to the anus, there is no evidence of injury to the skin around the vagina, the labia. There is no indication of healed scars in any of those areas. There is no other indication from the autopsy report at all that there is any other previous injuries that have healed in that area.
Note that this comment refers only to two specific areas: the anus and the skin around the vagina (the labia). Either Dr. Henry has been misinformed about what the experts actually said about JonBenet's genital injuries, or this is a deliberate straw man. The evidence of prior abuse has nothing to do with the anus or the skin around the vagina (the labia). It is misleading for the documentary to present this information as if it were relevant to the evidence of prior abuse.
Leon Kelly, MD
In the documentary The Killing of JonBenet: The Truth Uncovered, Colorado Springs medical examiner Dr. Leon Kelly is solicited to review "the evidence on prior sexual abuse" (i.e., a copy of the autopsy report provided by the documentary crew) and give his opinion. This is what Dr. Kelly had to say:
The exam reveals no evidence of healing, or prior injuries. No evidence of scarring. No evidence of other changes or findings which forensic pathologists look to to indicate prior sexual abuse.
Much has been made about a few lines of information where the pathologist describes some chronic inflammation. Some have extrapolated that to mean 'well, we've got chronic injury, therefore we've got chronic sexual abuse.' In fact, that's not what those few words of text mean. Vaginitis, which is a very nonspecific term for inflammation, is very common in children and can be due to things as simple as irritation from soap or poor wiping. So common to the point that it's essentially a normal finding. And to extrapolate someone else's guilt as far as inflicting sexual abuse, that's not based in science.
1) Dr. Kelly is correct that the autopsy report contains no information about indications of healed scars or previous healed injuries. However, that doesn't mean there were none present. Interpreting such details was outside the scope of the coroner's abilities; it would have been inappropriate for him to comment on it in the autopsy report. Per standard protocol when a coroner is uncertain about a finding, experts were later consulted to make an assessment. Much of the prior abuse evidence was documented and established outside of the autopsy report. It is misleading for the documentary to conflate the autopsy report with the "evidence on prior sexual abuse."
2) This statement attempts to reduce the evidence of prior sexual abuse to chronic inflammation, vaginitis, and erythema from soap or poor wiping. Once again, the evidence of prior sexual abuse is not based on chronic inflammation, vaginitis, erythema, or any other nonspecific findings. It is based on findings which meet the criteria specific for nonacute penetrative trauma.
Woodward's 'four experts'
In her book and in interviews such as this HLN documentary, Paula Woodward claims that four experts testified to there being no prior sexual abuse.
I have already responded to this claim in this post.
The FBI believed that JonBenet's vaginal trauma was not consistent with a history of sexual abuse, and they had turned up no evidence of any other type of abuse. The sexual violation of JonBenet, whether pre or postmortem did not appear to have been committed for the perpetrators gratification. The penetration, which caused minor genital trauma, was more likely part of a staged crime scene intended to mislead the police.
[Perfect Murder, Perfect Town, Lawrence Schiller, p. 305]
This is the opinion of FBI criminal profilers, not medical experts. It is an assessment based on behavior and elements of the crime and crime scene, not genital findings.
Melinda and John Andrew Ramsey
John Ramsey's two older children, Melinda and John Andrew, have stated there was no abuse in their family.
This is not a medical opinion.
Carnes Order
No evidence, however, suggests that she was the victim of chronic sexual abuse. (SMF P 50; PSMF P 50.)
This is not a medical opinion. It is a claim taken from a document called Defendants Statement of Undisputed Material Facts which was prepared by the Ramseys' defense attorneys in the 2003 civil case Wolf v Ramsey.
Responses to common myths Experts disagree/are divided on the prior sexual abuse
The experts most qualified to assess the evidence, the child sexual abuse experts consulted by Boulder Police and the Boulder County Coroner's Office, were unanimous in their conclusion that there was physical evidence of prior sexual abuse. No one has disputed their findings.
The evidence of prior sexual abuse in this case is based on the genital findings documented during autopsy. Interpreting genital findings should be done only by skilled clinicians with expertise in pediatric anogenital anatomy and sexual abuse evaluation criteria. This is emphasized in every modern clinical manual or textbook on child sexual abuse evaluations:
  • The identification and interpretation of medical and laboratory findings in children with possible sexual abuse require an evaluation by a health care provider who has a high level of knowledge, clinical expertise, and familiarity with the research studies describing findings in nonabused and abused children.
    [Joyce A. Adams, MD. Medical Response to Child Sexual Abuse: A Resource for Clinicians and Other Professionals, p. 117]
  • Medical providers who examine children for suspected sexual abuse must be well trained, knowledgeable, and comfortable performing a specialized genital examination. They must be astute at diagnosing findings related to abuse and findings that only mimic abuse.
    [T]he majority of medical providers remain inadequately trained to examine children for sexual abuse...Many examiners are unfamiliar with prepubertal genital anatomy and the range of anatomic findings that can be considered normal. An untrained or undertrained medical provider should not provide an expert opinion in a case of child sexual abuse.
    [Suzanne P. Starling, MD, FAAP. Medical Response to Child Sexual Abuse: A Resource for Clinicians and Other Professionals, pp.259-261]
All other opinions — by those who haven't seen the genital findings and/or lack expertise in child sexual abuse evaluations and pediatric anogenital anatomy— are just noise.
Bubble baths/urinary issues/UTIs/vaginitis could explain the prior sexual abuse evidence
Child abuse experts are acutely aware what findings are caused by bubble baths, urinary issues, UTIs, vaginitis, and that they are not specific for sexual abuse. Their area of specialty is in distinguishing normal/nonabuse findings and findings that mimic abuse findings from actual abuse findings. No child abuse expert is going to mistake a common nonspecific finding like inflammation or erythema for an abuse finding; that is specifically what they are trained not to do.
The evidence of prior sexual abuse is based on findings that meet the criteria specific for nonacute penetrating trauma.
Findings caused by bubble baths/urinary issues/UTIs/vaginitis are listed in the Adams classification guidelines. See points 12 and 13 under section B ("Findings commonly caused by medical conditions other than trauma or sexual contact") and point 23 under section C ("Findings due to other conditions, which can be mistaken for abuse.")
Horseback/bicycle riding or other physical activity could explain the prior sexual abuse evidence
  • The hymenal membrane is recessed in the vestibule, protecting it from direct trauma; hence the implausibility of injury to the membrane from athletic activity such as bicycling, horseback riding, or gymnastics. The common misconception that athletic activities result in injuries to the hymen has no scientific support.
    [Child Abuse: Medical Diagnosis and Management, 4th ed. Antoinette Laskey and Andrew Sirotnak (eds.), p. 350]
  • Also physical activities like gymnastics, running, jumping or splits do not lead to hymenal damage (Bays 1993, 2001, Emans 1994, Finkelstein 1996).
    [B. Herrmann, F. Navratil, Sexual Abuse in Prepubertal Children and Adolescents, p. 12]
JonBenet's pediatrician was in the best place to recognize abuse
It is a mistake to assume pediatricians are capable of detecting every case of child abuse. The unfortunate reality is that abuse is missed all the time by medical professionals and caretakers, even by those trained to recognize it. Sexual abuse is, by its very nature, secretive. It almost always occurs when the child is alone with the offender. Victims tend to delay or avoid disclosure. In fact, we now know from decades of research that many children who have experienced sexual abuse grow up before they tell anyone about what happened. Many children exhibit no symptoms of sexual abuse at all.
Historically, one of the problems that has hindered clinical recognition of sexual abuse is that many physicians, including pediatricians, have found it hard to imagine that their child patients are victims of sexual abuse. Suzanne M. Sgroi, an early pioneer in raising awareness of child sexual abuse in the medical community, emphasized this point in a 1975 article where she told medical practioners that "in order to make the diagnosis of child sexual abuse, one must entertain the possibility that it occurs."
The same sentiment was echoed in 2000 by Astrid Heger:
Although we have made tremendous progress over the past fifteen years, sexual abuse continues to present a unique challenge to the medical professional. Making the diagnosis requires that clinicians first come to terms with their own inner rejection of the fundamental concept that adults use children for sexual gratification.
[Astrid Heger, MD. Evaluation of the Sexually Abused Child: A Medical Textbook and Photographic Atlas, p. 2]
Sexual abuse being a discomforting taboo topic is a problem that child abuse experts have been trying to correct for a long time. Another problem is the tendency for people (including physicians and healthcare providers) to hold assumptions or biases about what victims of sexual abuse are like, and what what perpetrators of child sexual abuse are like.
From statements he has made, it sounds like Dr. Beuf held such assumptions about JonBenet. His belief that she was not sexually abused seems based largely on his own psychosocial assessment of her and his impression of her family. JonBenet was a "sweet", "charming", "fun", "extraordinary" child, full of "happiness" and "niceness", someone "much loved by her parents." It seems Dr. Beuf could not fathom that someone like JonBenet could be a victim of sexual abuse, or that it could occur in a family like hers.
The fact is, children who are well-adjusted and happy can be victims of sexual abuse. People who are financially successfull, educated, upstanding members of the community can be perpetrators of sexual abuse. Sexual abuse occurs in all kinds of families across different socioeconomic and education levels. It's not possible to profile who is a victim or perpetrator of sexual abuse by assessing demographics and demeanor.
It is also a mistake to assume that pediatricians have sufficient knowledge and training in recognizing sexual abuse, conducting evaluations for sexual abuse, or familiarity with pediatric genital anatomy. On the contrary, pediatricians are undertrained in matters relating to child abuse.
Pediatricians receive the most training on abuse related topics, but they are still undertrained.
[Suzanne P. Starling, MD, FAAP. Medical Response to Child Sexual Abuse: A Resource for Clinicians and Other Professionals, p. 263]
Several studies have demonstrated a shortfall in physicians' and pediatric residents' knowledge about sexual abuse and ability to label basic parts of prepubertal genital anatomy.
One study surveyed 370 physicians who treat children, once in 1986 and again in 1996. In 1986, 51.1% of them were able to correctly identify the hymen in a photograph of prepubertal female genitalia. In 1996, 61.7% were able to correctly identify the hymen.
In another study based on a survey of 139 pediatric chief residents between 1998-2000, 71% correctly identified the hymen in an anatomic photograph. The residents surveyed in the study reported varying amounts of training on issues pertaining to child sexual abuse and half of those surveyed thought their training in sexual abuse during residency was inadequate for practice.
A comparative study by Makoroff and colleagues found that 70% of the female genital exams diagnosed by pediatric emergency medicine physicians as abnormal were diagnosed normal by child abuse-trained physicians who reexamined the findings.
It's unknown what level of child abuse training Dr. Beuf had. His areas of specialty were in asthma/allergy and neonatology. He entered medical school in 1972; any training, if any, he received at that time would have required later updating.
Diagnostic acumen in child abuse can be a reflection of the decade during which a physician trained. Child sexual abuse research did not become prevalent until the late 1980s. Physicians trained during or before that time who have not had updated training may be basing their knowledge on obsolete and incorrect information.
[Suzanne P. Starling, MD, FAAP. Medical Response to Child Sexual Abuse: A Resource for Clinicians and Other Professionals, p. 260]
Some comments made by Dr. Beuf in interviews lead me to question if his training and knowledge in the areas of child sexual abuse evaluations and genital anatomy were sufficient.
In a 20/20 Primetime interview, Diane Sawyer asked Beuf:
DIANE SAWYER: If there had been an abrasion involving the hymen, you would have seen it?
Dr. FRANCESCO BEUF: Probably. I can't say absolutely for sure because you don't do a speculum exam on a child that young at least unless it's under anesthesia.
To me, this response betrays an unfamiliarity with the standards and protocols of sexual abuse evaluations and genital anatomy.
First, specula are not used with prepubertal girls except in certain cases (for example, to find the source of unexplained bleeding, a mass or a foreign body). They are not used at all for genital evaluations of prepubertal girls.
The anogenital examination in cases of suspected sexual abuse of the prepubertal child is principally an external visualization by varying techniques of separation, traction and positioning. It does not require anal or vaginal palpation or the use of specula.
[B. Herrmann, F. Navratil, Sexual Abuse in Prepubertal Children and Adolescents, p. 8]
Second, the hymen is at the entrance of the vaginal orifice and can be easily visualized without instruments. The purpose of the speculum is to see past the hymen at the vaginal walls and cervix, not at the hymen — the use of a speculum would not only impede the view of the hymen it will damage the hymen. Anyone with a basic understanding of prepubertal female genital anatomy and knowledge of how genital examinations are done would find the notion of a speculum being needed to examine the hymen absurd.
Another comment which indicates a lack of anatomical familiarity is Dr. Beuf's use of "vaginal exam" (which is synonymous with pelvic exam, an internal exam) when he means "vulval exam" or "extragenital exam." The implication between the two types of exams is important to distinguish.
In his defense, if Dr. Beuf was undertrained in these areas, it would not be atypical of a pediatrician at the time, according to the research.
In sum, I see no reason why someone who:
  • did not evaluate JonBenet for sexual abuse
  • did not see JonBenet's hymen
  • did not see the genital findings from JonBenet's autopsy
  • did not specialize in child sexual abuse evaluations
would be in a better place to recognize abuse over those who:
  • evaluated JonBenet for sexual abuse
  • saw JonBenet's hymen
  • saw the genital findings from JonBenet's autopsy
  • specialized in child sexual abuse evaluations.
I think we should all remember what pioneering child abuse pediatrician, Dr. C. Henry Kempe, told a conferenceful of pediatricians in 1977:
Moreover, it is common for children, who are regularly cared for by their pediatrician, to be involved in incest for many years without their physician knowing. Incest makes pediatricians and everyone else very uncomfortable.
[C. Henry Kempe, MD. Sexual Abuse, Another Hidden Pediatric Problem: The 1977 C. Anderson Aldrich Lecture]
The evidence of prior sexual abuse isn't conclusive
What is conclusive is the evidence of prior vaginal penetration, as demonstrated by the presence of a transection on JonBenet's inferior hymenal rim.
This finding is one of only a few reliable indicators of sexual abuse among prepubertal girls. On its own, it's not conclusive of sexual abuse. Combined with other information, it can be conclusive of sexual abuse. In JonBenet's case, an absence of a history for this finding combined with the rest of JonBenet's genital findings and history led five child abuse experts to conclude that JonBenet had been sexually abused prior to her murder.
Why I find the evidence of prior sexual abuse convincing The evidence of prior sexual abuse is convincing simply because there's an unexplained transection of the inferior hymenal rim, in which case the default suspected cause is sexual abuse.
In prepubertal girls, transections of the inferior hymenal rim resulting from causes other than sexual abuse (i.e., accidental penetrating trauma or surgical intervention) are rare and need to be accounted for in order to rule out the more common cause which is sexual abuse. If no explanation for the injury is provided, either from the child, caretaker, or the child's medical history, medical protocol requires that the case be reported and investigated for suspected sexual abuse.
In JonBenet's case, the Ramseys were unable to provide an explanation for the prior hymenal injury, and whatever medical information and history provided to police gave no explanation either. Significantly, JonBenet herself could not explain it because she was found murdered in her home with acute penetrative injuries to her vagina and hymen.
On top of that is the unanimous assessment by multiple child abuse experts whose credentials speak for themselves. These experts have knowledge we don't have and they saw evidence we haven't seen. I see no reason to question their assessment.
Conclusion The evidence of prior sexual abuse is not based on criteria or findings that are not specific to sexual abuse, such as:
  • chronic inflammation/vulvovaginitis/erythema
  • UTIs/dysuria
  • regressed toileting/bedwetting/soiling
  • high number of pediatrician visits
  • 1x1cm hymenal opening
The evidence of prior sexual abuse is based on:
  • the documented presence of a transection of the inferior hymenal rim (point 37 on the Adams classification guidelines), which, in absence of known accidental genital trauma, is a specific indicator of past sexual abuse
  • the interpretation of genital findings from JonBenet's autopsy by specialists trained in distinguishing signs of abuse from non-abuse, evaluated in the context of JonBenet's medical history and history.
There is no medical debate on this issue. Some doctors who are not qualified to give an opinion have disputed the conclusion of the child abuse experts, but that's it. No one has disputed the specific findings of the experts. The notion that "the experts are in disagreement" and "there's evidence to support both sides of the debate" is completely false.
Why this is important to me Of all the evidence that I see get misrepresented in this case, I think this one bothers me the most. I hate seeing it dismissed or denied by those who don't even have a proper understanding of it. I find it insulting for anyone to suggest these highly qualified and trained experts who have dedicated their careers to accurately identifying signs of sexual abuse are so incompetent as to not be able to distinguish bubble-bath-induced vulvovaginitis or erythema from sexual abuse. They do; being able to tell the difference is quite literally the entire purpose of their subspecialty.
Due to all of the misinformation surrounding it, I don't think enough people realize how medically sound the evidence of prior sexual abuse actually is. That is a disservice to JonBenet and her case.
Autopsy is the art of speaking with the dead. Dead men girls do tell tales, as the saying goes in forensic pathology. JonBenet's body is an important piece of evidence that reveals what happened to her, not only on the night she died but days, weeks, or months before. Many knowledgable and reputable medical experts got together and examined her to help tell that story. Unless there's evidence they are wrong, then I think we should listen.
To quote something straydog77 once said in reply to a prior abuse denialist:
Those are physical facts. Identified by the nation's leading expert on pediatric genital anatomy. Those are the injuries. Though Jonbenet cannot speak, her injuries can testify on her behalf. No amount of smoke and mirrors from you will erase those injuries. Thank God. You cannot silence this child.
Sources On the Ramsey Case
Perfect Murder, Perfect Town - Lawrence Schiller
JonBenet: Inside the Ramsey Murder Investigation - Donald A. Davis & Steve Thomas
Foreign Faction: Who Really Killed JonBenet? - A. James Kolar
Mortal Evidence: The Forensics Behind Nine Shocking Cases - Cyril Wecht, Greg Saitz, and Mark Curriden
Who Killed JonBenet Ramsey? - Cyril Wecht and Charles Bosworth, Jr.
We Have Your Daughter: The Unsolved Murder of JonBenét Ramsey Twenty Years Later - Paula Woodward
Autopsy report
Bonita Papers
January 30, 1997 Search Warrant
Patsy Ramsey 1998 police interview
Steve Thomas 2001 deposition
Reddit AMA with Mark Beckner
Reddit AMA with James Kolar
Julie Hayden KHOW Dan Caplis interview transcript
Julie Hayden Channel 7 news report
Krugman on Burden of Proof
Daily Camera - Report indicates sexual assault, experts conclude
Daily Camera - Autopsy evidence leaves experts in disagreement
Girl Had No History Of Being Abused
KUSA-TV interview with Dr. Beuf
ABC Primetime Live interview with Dr. Beuf
[sources continued in comments]
submitted by AdequateSizeAttache to JonBenetRamsey [link] [comments]

2020.09.24 16:05 gowildandfilmit3 Heading to Texas

You headed to Utah to pick up Meghann and bring her back to Texas after convincing her to leave her husband. You had already seen her at the airport, met some of her family and saw some of her friends. The car was packed to the brim with Meghann's stuff, or at least all that would fit, and you were ready to go. At the last moment, you called up Meghann's two best friends Heather and Cassandra. They've been her closest friend through this whole mess and have even helped her tap into her crazy wild side. There had been many a night where you would receive topless pictures of either Meghann or Heather. Now, you and Meghann head to a motel and are waiting for Cassandra and Heather to arrive for one last night of partying with them before leaving for Texas.
You arrive with Meghann at the motel room and as usual there is no sign of your other two friends. The motel room is nicer than most but not by much. It's arranged in a C shape, with a sofa and desk at the entry way, a bathroom in the middle that blocks the desk from the bed, and a king sized bed on the other end with the door for the bathroom being close to the bed. You head to the car and unload some of the alcohol and mixers with Meghann who heads to the bathroom. While Meghann showers, you mix a couple of drinks. you make yours a bit weak and make hers a bit strong. Meghann comes out of the bathroom fully dressed and you hand her her drink. Heather and Cassandra (who goes by Cass) should be arriving soon.
As you hand Meghann her strong drink, you look at your watch and mention the time. Heather and Cass should be here any minute. The drink goes down rather quick and you can see signs of inebriation. You finish off your drink seconds before you hear Heather honk the horn. Heather and Cass come into the room and it is instantly turned into a party. The music gets turned on, everyone is dancing by the bed, and you mix drinks for the girls.
Heather looks at Meghann and says "I can't believe you're fucking leaving! Dude, you know how fucked up this is right?" Cass quickly reminds Heather that you don't think it is as bad as they do. Anyway, the four of you have a bunch of space to party in and randomly choose the bed as the prime spot to do so.
Meghann says to Heather, "dude you know I had to get out of there. Our girls nights were the only thing keeping me sane!" You busy yourself with making drinks as the girls talk but head slightly closer to them. Heather says something about there being more than enough of you to have nights like this but in Texas, Meghann says soberly.
> You say "I think I'm plenty enough for Meghann! At least until she makes some friends. I can take care of her just fine" You knew rebelliously saying this would get you some looks from the girls and you're right.
> You say "I mean... I know it won't be like y'all's girls nights, but I'm sure I can find a reason for Meghann to take a picture of her titties! " Cass cuts in and pulls up your comment. Cass says "Hah! I like this guy already!" with a smirk, which troubles you.
> You say "I do what I can" You lean in behind Meghann and put your arm around her in a side hug. Cass then says "I still can't believe you figured out it was Meghann's ass in that picture we sent." as the look of disbelief appears on her face again. "Hah! I remembered her asking me what type of pic she should take and I knew she would probably do something like that to show off! Although..."
> You say "I'm just glad Heather talked Meghann into taking a pic of her vag!" You knew that was pushing it, but they were going in a good flow of jokes and you wanted to join in on it. Cass asks "Why didn't she ask you?!"
> You say "ask me what?" "how to take a good picture of her hole." you say. You nearly see Cass spit out her drink in shock that you just said and Heather can't quite do it.
> You say "Well heather was nice enough to send one first! Meghann even took the picture!" Meghann starts laughing and slurs out "fuuuuck... haha! you've got a lot of stupid jokes!" Cass giggles too before saying "I might be as drunk as her but that was funny."
> You say "I'm glad Heather isn't shy with photos. It really helped out for while Meghann and I were apart" Meghann cuts in "Bullshiiiiiit.... you missed flirting with me that badly huh?
> You say "Hell yeah I did! It was tough only getting to see bits of nudity from you once a week" You hug her from behind while she lets you. Cass cuts in and asks "wait did Heather take ALL of the pics from back then?" You turn quiet at the question.
> You say "I think she took most of them. Meghann did eventually send me some full nudes she took of herself" Cass is clearly interested "Hm... well we ABOUT those!" Disgustedly, you reply slurring your words because the marijuana has gotten to your head.
> You say "Meghann, did you show them those pictures?" She laughs."I was waiting for you!!" Both the girls lean a bit into you, with Heather putting her hand on your leg.
> You say "ok, who wants to see Meghanns nudie pictures she took?" Meghann just holds her hands out to reveal a smart phone sized device with a touchscreen. Heather is quickly grabbing it and searching for the pictures, eventually acessing photo library.
> You say "Did you find the pictures?" Meghann taps Cass on the shoulder and hands her the phone, who puts it on full brightness so everyone could see.
> You say "How does Meghann look? Not bad pictures right?" You look on the screen. Naked, Meghann in her bathroom without a casewrapping her black hair into a bun.
> You say "You know how much effort it took to get Meghann to take that one? I got off to it tons of times" Everyone laughs. The next one is Meghann naked too without a top. How drunk did you let her get?! Next one, it looks like she took it with both of you.
> You say "That last one we took at the airport. We haven't gotten to take many pictures together yet." Megham kisses you on the cheek blushing, and the rest of you look at more pictures. This one? Ew no. That one is just of her head.
> You say "We all have to take some pictures. Lets do a group shot before we get too drunk" With those words, you hop to your feet and everyone does. Well everyone else sits in the bed but enough people could take a good group photo.
> You say "everyone say titties!" "TITTIES!!" Everyone shout, and Cass takes a picture. Cass laughs and starts texting the picture to everyone in your phone.
> You say "Hey Heather, how about we put you in charge of the camera for taking pictures?"
> You say "Here Heater, take the digital camera." "Yes! I've always wanted to be in charge of pictures." Heather takes your phone and you could see her scrolling through some of the pre-mentioned pictures.
> You say "So Heather, what picture should we take first? Tell us how to pose and you take the picture" Heather grins, getting frisky. "Come on someone kiss! Then I'll be ready with the picture!"
> You kiss meghann. After smooching Heather is kind enough to take a picture of the two of you, with mouths wide open. Cass leans in.
> You say "how was that?" "Perfect." Heather lookes at your phone. "I like this guy." You quickly grab the phone before she could show the entire group of people what would be the topless shot. "Ahhh!"
> You say "Is that the picture we're taking next? haha" Heather gets more serious whilst looking at it "Yeah." turning to you, she pauses for a second.
> You say "lets do it! Who is the picture going to be of?" Cass decides that she'll be the photographer. Heather poses and everyone else is putting their arm around her or vaguely smiling at the phone, The phone camera flashes, mildly blinding everyone into a flawless picture. During one of the pictures, heather lifts her shirt and exposes her breast. Cass takes the picture and Heather quickly lowers her shirt again. Almost as if anticipating Cass would take that picture. Everyone starts laughing and Heather gets into a mock rage throwing pillow at Cass. Meghann says "ok, take my picture next!" She starts making poses under Heather's guidance who is holding the phone on it's side, every one approves of the different shots. then Heather says "get your tits out for one picture!" Heather added. "Just one!". Meghann smiles and complies, you feel akward doing this in such a large group but everyone seems to enjoy it, it's seen as a joke after all.
> You say "uh oh. I think cass is next for a titty picture" Theres an outburst of laughter shortly after hearing you speak. Heather stands up quickly "oh, so now you're doing a prophet act oh wise one?" > You say "Well I figured since you and Meghann took pictures with your titties out, cass would be the next one" "Oh! I have an idea it was your turn?" Everyone laughs and almost gets behind Cass because everyone got behind Heather before, all cheering.
> You say "my turn? Ok, well, I don't have titties. What should I flash for the camera?" Heather stands up "Well we got to see your cute butt, so you could flash that"
> You say "fair enough! Take a picture of my butt!" You pull your pants and underwear down slightly so that your but is hanging out for the camera, sure enough everyone starts laughing and taking pictures of your butt. You are a bit embarassed but laugh along with humiliation.
> You say "ok cass. Now it's time for you to take a picture with your huge titties out" Cass raises an eyebrow "They are not huge." And starts flipping out whiel laughing about someone besides her husband seeing her topless. Everyone starts chanting "topless, topless".
> You chant. Finally she agrees, seemingly out of embarrassment though the chant. "Fine i'll do it"
> You cheer. Mehgann helps her take the shirt off as the chant continues, you can feel how tense she is despite looking calm... Or everyone is just so excited they are ignoring it to enjoy the moment.
> You take a picture of cass. Cass pulls her phone out and quickly tries to take a picture. Everyone else lines up as well, eagerly wanting their topless photo. Cass says,"okay back away!"
> You say "alright. you did good. Nice tits cass!" "thanks....they aren't that big you know!" everyone laughs as Mehgann dashes over and hugs Cass tightly. "and they feel real here." Mehgann jumps on you and wrestles your to the ground tightly hugging you while laughing.
> You say "Hey meghann, you want to do a magic trick with me?" Mehgann nods excitedly, "Definetly!" She sits on the recliner and Mehgann, Everyone backs up to give you space.
> You say "ok. here's how we're going to do it. Cass, you take the photo camera and Heather, you take the video camera and record this" You walk up close to Mehgann and glance at Cass and Heather to see they are ready.
> You say "heather and cass, you wait here. Meghann and I are going to prepare over by the desk. It's going to be just a minute and we'll be right back " Mehgann and you walk to the desk both wanting to giggle but refraining from doing so. Mehgann whispers "What's the REAL trick? you whisper quietly so only meghann can hear, "Ok, so you and i are going to be together and dating right?" you ask meghann She smiles at you saying "obviously" you whisper quietly so only meghann can hear, "Ok, How about we fuck for the first time on camera and get heather and cass to film it and take pictures? It'll be crazy hot" Meghann begins to blush and realizes you're suggesting that You'll actually do it. whisper so only meghann can hear, "you up for it?" Meghann nods her head quickly and whispers back "maybe lets go now before j have second thoughts"
> You say "ok. heather and cass stay here. Meghann and I will go prepare. Heather and cass, no peaking ok?" Cass nods her head quickly while Heather complains "not fair, should be able to see the show".
> You say "we'll show you the magic trick in just a second. just hang tight and don't look ok?" > You say "meghann and I will go over by the desk in the other room where you can't see us. Heather and cass, wait here on the bed" As cass and Heather wait their the bed you pause for a moment looking at those two on it, wondering what they might do once you and meghann are out of the room. you whisper to meghann so only she can hear, "ok, take off all your clothes and I'll do the same. We need to be quick" Meghann nods as you both stand and begin stripping off your clothes. you whisper to meghann so only she can hear "you look fucking hot naked." as you drop your clothes on the floor. Meghann blushes slightly before retrieving her phone and turning around to show you her naked buttocks as she transfers all her clothes into the drawer of the desk.
> you whisper to meghann so only she can hear "ok, now you're going to face away from me and I'm going to pick you up, spread your legs in the air and put you down on my cock. then we'll run out to the bed and tell heather and cass that they are in charge of filming and directing our first porno. sound good?" Meghann nods and turns around, she spreads her legs ready for you and you begin lifting her. with both of you facing the same direction, you lift meghann and bring her down so that your cock enters her pussy. both of you are happy, excited and extremely horny. you shout towards the other room "cass and heather, are you ready with the cameras?" They reply with a solid yes and meghann tells you to go for it.
you walk quickly into the bedroom and show cass and heather that you're carrying meghann, that you're both naked, you're both facing heather and cass and your cock is inside meghann. meghann spreads her arms and her legs and you can clearly see your cock is inside her pussy. Meghann shouts "TA-DA! This is our fucking magic trick!" They flip out and begin taking images and pictures and videos. you shout out "welcome to Facundo and Meghann's first porno! Directed and filmed by Cass and Heather! what do you think? Want to help us enjoy our first time fucking?" Cass and Heather giggle together and Cass replies. "We want to make sure it looks perfect before we start shooting!" It seems they want to see your hot sexual action in comfort first.
> You keep fucking meghann while standing and carrying her. You continue putting your hands around meghann and you begin drawing back and forth. From the visual stimulus it seems to be working pretty well for her.
> You say "ok heather and cass. you're in charge of what we do. what should we do next?" Heather suggests that you keep going but turn a bit towards the bed so they get a clear view.
> You turn towards the bed and give heather a better view. Cass snaps away with the camera as you begin pushing a little deeper, and then pull out at the top of each movement. As you see more and more of Cass's stomach, your mind starts to wander...
> You say "how should we fuck next?" Heather suggests something you'd not exepct from a 33 old, Anal
> You say "that was quick! How about we save anal for a bit later. What else would we do?" She enthusiastically replies, "let's flip over!" Meghann seems equally as stunned as you are by Heather's commanding suggestions. You defer to each of them and go on in the current pose. you put meghann down on the bed and flip her over to a missionary style position and slide your cock into her pussy. you say to heather and cass "are you getting this on video?" Heather looks shocked and replies "I'm the only one with a camera!" You catch the subtle hint that she wants to be in charge of everything including the video.
> You keep fucking meghann. You proceed to have an interesting yet slow movement in which you move in and out of meghann at a reasonable pace. While this is happening heather climbs onto the bed you're on, getting behind you.
> You say "heather, what are you trying to see?" Heather mounts behind you and responds "I can't see a thing from the cameras angle, so I'm going to get into position while you keep thrusting!" this comes to surprise to meghann.
> You say "fuck yeah! You got it! I'll keep thrusting, you keep filming" "Sounds good to me!" says heather slyly Heather gets on her knees and begins sticking her fingers into your butthole.
> You say "wow! That's hot but you should but your fingers in meghanns ass if you want us to do anal" "You're right, it would make things easier for us" Heather pauses for a minute to put her fingers in your girlfriend's butthole and you can't help but groan at what she's doing.
> You say "Cass, did you get the picture of heather fingering meghanns asshole?" "Oh yeah, it's a good one! I almost came when Heather stuck her finger up your girlfriend's bum!" She pulls out all the stops and brings the conversation back to herself.
> You say "Meghann, you think it's ok if cass masturbates?" Meghann's head turns surprisingly quickly from looking at heather crouched behind you all the way over to Cass as she says "um" and then nods, continuing right where she left off before the distraction.
> You say "cass, you can masturbate if you like. Meghann says it's ok" Cass doesn't need an explanation and automically begins going down her shorts. Feeling left out you decide to just concentrate on meghann, specifically getting off.
> You say "heather and cass, how should meghann and i fuck next?" Cass quickly gets over her embarrassment and puts on her bossy teaching voice; she says "You should get meghann doggy style so you can see" as she turns to heather happily. you flip meghann over and put her on all fours. you put your cock back into her pussy and keep fucking meghann. You can see every thrust in vivid detail but lose site of her cute little bum poking up in the air which is unfortunate.
> You say "your asshole is so cute meghann" You smack your girlfriends left butt check rather hard and heather doens't seem to mind the view. you give it a kiss and push your tongue in a bit "Its very tasty"
> You say "did you get the picture of me licking her asshole?" heather just says "Um... Just the angle isn't ideal...." You watch heather get onto her knees behind the pair of your girlfriends tiny butt.
> You say "i think we should change it up and meghann should ride me. I'll get on bottom" After you say that meghann pops off you and gets into position, sitting on your hard on. You begin to see all the action which makes it better than than anything you've ever done!
> You say "heather are you still taking video?" Heather says "You want me to start recording it?" You nod as you start thrusting up into Meganan's body.
> You say "cass, are you still taking pictures?" Cass says "Oh! Sorry, got a bit distracted..." as she starts flipping through the picture. She stops suddenly and shows heather one.
> You say "what are you doing instead cass? are you masturbating?" Cass nods and whispers quietly "I'm playing with myself... all this dirty fun...." She pulls heather into a kiss as she starts fingering heather below.
> You say "ok meghann, i think it's time you put my cock in your ass before we lose our camera person" Megann pauses for a moment and says "But I don't have any lube... doesn't it hurt?" You reach over to the bed side table and find your half used bottle of cocoa butter lotion.
> You say "lets put this on your asshole. I think you'll love this" Taking the lotion in hand you squirt some on your fingers. You put your middle finger to her sphincter and push in gently but insistently with no troubles at all. "Say ahhh"
> You lay on your back and tell meghann to sit on your cock and put it in her asshole. Megann grabs your throbbing member and slowly ducks her plump rump over it, letting out a pleasurable sigh as it disappears inside. She places her hands on your chest as you do the same.
> You say "hell yeah! Heather, you getting video of me fucking meghann's ass?" Cass holds up her phone to show a close-up of Meganans backside descending slowly onto your groin as she sits down fully on it with a moan.
> You say "meghann you look amazing with my cock in your ass" Megann continues to sit there and moves her hips slowly back and forth a minute before saying anything. With it stuffed in her butt she says "Too much talking back there, come here."
> You say "hey cass, are you still masturbating?" Cass nods and smiles "Me too!" Heather adds before quickly changing the subject "this is sort of strange foreplay isn't it?"
> You say "hey meghann, is it ok if I finger cass and heather?" You watch as she goes "Hmmmmm...." then turns to Heather and Cass, nodding eagerly while saying "Yes! Do it!
> You finger cass and heather while fucking meghann. You smile and slip the scrap of spandex tied around your waist off then proceed to start fingering each gently.
> You say "hey meghann. can I fuck cass and heather too?" Meganan takes a deep breath and pauses for just a second before saying "I don't see why not.... they're into me so a lot of spit can make it possible. > You say "someone suck my cock please" Heather quickly gets onto to her knees and puts your erection in her haed. She begins sliding up and down it as Cass just gapes in awe. The blonde struggles to fit half of it into her mouth.
> You say "who wants their ass fucked?" Heather seems to notice your predicament as she points at her rectum and backs up to you, her bum hovering over your lap. > You fuck heather's ass. Apparently heather's rectum was the perfect fit for your member because it felt so snug and soft that you couldnt help but thrust in and out.
> You say "hey meghann, take a picture of me fucking heather's asshole" Meghann pulls out her phone and takes a photo of your private moments. She texts it to you and after looking at it, most likely Snapchat it to her and Cass.
> You say "girls, bend over and line up your assholes. I want to fuck each one" The two girls seem embarrassed and a bit shocked. Cass bends over as Heather follows Cass' lead, although both have a worried look on their faces not sure what you had in mind exactly.
> You thrust into heather's ass, then into meghann's ass, then into cass' ass. Cass backs up into the tip of your warm throbbing member. You slowly push into her rectum and her sphincter tightens as she lets out a breathy moan.
> You say "oh yeah! This is awesome" Meghann whispers "well, somebody's idea of heaven" She holds on to Cass to keep herself steady as she slides up and down your length.
> You say "everyone get on your knees and press your faces together" They each do exactly what you say as you grab Cass' hips and Mehghan grabs Cass' shoulders for balance.
> You say "get your faces close together" The three of them get in a triangle involving all their faces, just their faces though. You can't help but stare at their asses as you slowly enter Cass' backside. you grab the video camera and point it at the three naked ladies on their knees. you say you're about to cum and all of the girls open their mouths and stick out their tongues expectantly. They are all touching themselves and upon seeing that, you have a massive orgasm that coats all of their faces and tits with cum. You get some in their eyes and Despite your warnings. they all smile and wink at the camera before ending the recording.
> You say "alright ladies, how about each of you do a sign off for the video" Cass winking at the camera says "Hi I'm Cass. That was me taking a big load to the face" she smiles and sticks out her tongue swiveling it around to taste your warm salty offering. Heather takes the camera from you and looks playfully into it "Hey I'm Heather. Guess what? I just got facialed!" she giggles and proceeds to lick her lips, scooping up a bit of your seed on the end of her tongue before swallowing.
> You say "Your turn to do a sign off meghann" She grins and takes the camera from Heather "I'm Megan.You just witnessed three girls who all just had their pretty little faces sprayed with hot jizz. Hope you enjoyed our first GWA video. Bye bye"
submitted by gowildandfilmit3 to u/gowildandfilmit3 [link] [comments]

2020.09.08 20:43 BloodZod Camera inside anal

It all happened about three months into our relationship. I had been planning on leaving him that night due to his far less than average dick size, but mostly becuase all he talked about were "gains" and "pumps." I wish he'd consider a penis pump--sorry a girl has needs! And even when we'd try and make love, he'd always complain that I was hurting him when I was on top. I'm 4' 2" and barely 115 lbs!
Also, when I really decided it was time to leave was about the time he started putting cameras up inside his apartment. I asked him why, but he couldn't justify it and mumbled something about his uncle's penis. He never quite opened up about that, and refused to seek help for whatever it was, but it clearly left a mark.
His uncle also isn't technically his uncle, but his family just refers to him as "uncle." I didn't really feel like delving any deeper into that. His family often gave me weird vibes, as well. The aforementioned uncle seemed to "smell" me when we first met and hugged. My boyfriend said he does that to everyone. Okayyyyy! Also, when the family got together, they'd say "shame!" instead of "Cheers" when they toasted. Not a deal breaker, but just...odd. Since he wasn't adept at pleasing me, I often resorted to dildos and vibrators to take care of my needs. It turns out he reviewed his cameras and saw that and confronted me over it. I told him it was an invasion of privacy, and then asked what would happen if we broke up and he decided to upload videos or still shots of me masturbating to which he replied by shouting at me "I DON'T KNOW HOW TO UPLOAD."
At one point, about a month and a half in to our relationship I thought he was cheating. I enlisted my buddy Homeless Greg (Homeless Greg got his name by being a run of the mill stoner who couch surfed most of his life, but was also really well known for being hung like two bowling pins taped up end to end), who ended up following my BF to the gym. Homeless Greg said all my boyfriend did was dress out in a blue unitard and watch the other guys work out and say stuff to them like, "Nice pump bro. Get that pump! Love it when you pump like that." He wasn't even working out! I didn't know what to think about that.
There was also the time he basically said he was dating me because I was so tiny. I asked why that mattered and he gestured towards his penis. I should've ran then.
After that red flag, and seeing him roid rage out and threaten to put bars on the windows to keep me in if I ever decided to leave him...I knew I had to end it soon, but I was too scared to end it practically and so I hatched a plan to pretend to be addicted to meth. The first part of my plan involved me hiring Homeless Greg from around the way to pretend to be my meth dealer. The deal was we'd hang around the apartment on the cameras and pretend to smoke meth and do "meth head type stuff." Homeless Greg set me back about 20 dollars and a splash of anal, but honestly, it was a huge upgrade from baby dick. So I paid Homeless Greg's debt and he hung around the apratment with me looking like a vagrant. I figured I ought to act the part too, but had no idea what habits meth addicts have so I just went with my instincts and shoved a wet dish rag halfway in my mouth for an hour or two.
Homeless Greg and I did this a couple times, and I usually paid him in anal or hard boiled eggs. Or both.
So Homeless Greg and I had set the stage for the meth addiction to play out. Now it was time for the main event. The Break Up.
The night I planned to do it started out like any other night: I masturbated alone to thougts of Homeless Greg and his mastodon dick while the boyfriend lifted weights in the other room and screamed his uncle's name into the mirror. I finished up, got up, and walked to his bedroom door.
"Hey I---" before I could get out another word he said "I love you."
Fuck. I have to adapt. I think about the three months I've wasted on this no-dick pump bro fanfiction writer and start crying and screaming and freaking out. I lay it on real thick, the same way Homeless Greg does when he pipes me out. I run off and lock myself in a room and continue to cry over the literal worst three months of my life. Eventually he tries to calm me down, but I stick to the plan and don't engage...
I wait for him to fall asleep. I can usually tell he's asleep by the way he whimpers in his sleep. Usually just sounds, but sometimes stuff like "yeah bro, pump me up" or "taking this won't make my dick small, will it?" and, "you think this is good enough to publish?" I creep around the apartment, get my trusty dish rag and just zone out and do "meth head stuff." I stick my face in his for awhile, stare at him, upper deck his toilet, and stand over him waiting for him to wake up.
Finally, he wakes up.
He looks concerned. I stare into--no, through him. He starts to make breakfast and I decide at this point it's best to have no mercy and turn it all the way up. I start mumbling (admittedly I was mumbling a song from Moana, but he couldn't hear) and then scream louder than the first time Homeless Greg entered my anal cavity. He ran. He ran from me! I half-heartedly gave chase, banged on the door and screamed cliche lines like "WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!" and "I'VE DONE SO MUCH FOR YOU." You know, shitty lines that most generic, basic assed writers would throw into a half-baked bullshit story for internet points. Real garbage assed lines that no one would really believe if they ever showed up in a story.
I finally decide it is my time to leave this tiny dick pump boi for good so I run out of the apartment and never look back. He has my "mother's" phone number, which is really just Homeless Greg doing a sick falsetto. Greg will make up some BS about my past and hopefully I can close this tiny chapter of my life.
Now he won't stop calling and I've gotten a few voicemails from him, begging to come back, rambling on about something called "body by jake" and still convinced that once he "gets a good pump" that he can take care of all my needs. He's also started saying he's going to reach out to my family and tell them about my "meth addiction" which I will have to deal with if he manages to get their real contact info.
TL;DR : Crazy gym rat BF won't let me leave him, pretend to be addicted to meth. BF still calling begging for it and trying to reach out to my "family."
submitted by BloodZod to tifu [link] [comments]

2020.09.03 14:36 XEcksDeeD Camera inside anal

For context, I just moved from my small hometown of like 7k people to a large city of 190k people. I'm used to large open highways with no red lights, barely any cops, and the biggest thing in the whole town is a fucking subpar Walmart.

The car that I drive does not belong to me. My parents let me borrow this car for college. I dropped out of college and am now only working a retail job which is 25-30 minutes away from where I live and barely pays me enough for rent. The car is still completely in their name, so if they wanted it back, they could EASILY take it from me and ruin my life because I'm a 19 year old kid who's just starting out.

I usually close my retail store up for the night as I'm not a morning person, so that's what I requested to be scheduled. My store closes at midnight. I usually don't get out of there until 12:30am. That's super late for a lot of people and I just want to get home because I have a 25-30 minute drive ahead of me and I usually don't get home till 1AM. That sucks a fuckton, in my opinion.

The first road I get on as I'm leaving from work is a straight residential road that has a speed limit of 30MPH. That's not bad when it's busy at rush hour in broad daylight, but when it's 12:30 at night and there's literally no headlights to be seen it sucks to be crawling at 30MPH. Sucks a lot.

I'll admit, I wasn't looking at my speedometer, I was just "going" as I usually do every night. I don't check what speed I go because I just go what feels comfortable, which at that time was apparently over double the speed limit. Rookie mistake and I've definitely learned my lesson.

So I get pulled over, I'm fucking shaking in my shorts khaki pants, and this whole time I'm thinking about how fucked I am. He ended up giving me a citation. Greeeatt. Fuck me. It's my fault, but it's not even my car and I'm absolutely screwed. My dad is especially going to kill me.

So I get let go, but now I'm paranoid as all get out. Time is in slow-mo as I go under the speed limit for the rest of the drive and am now in shock.

But oh wait. A FUCKING NEW CHALLENGER APPROACHES! A YELLOW LIGHT. Oh good. I'm glad I'm going the speed limit right now, but fucking hell I just want to get home so I can scream my little head off for the citation I just got.

So I speed up.
Fucking huge mistake. The light turns red WAY too early for my taste and here we go. I'm going slower than the customers I check out every day as I run this red light like an idiot. I see two bright flashes behind me. Fuck. I just got flashed by a camera that takes pictures of your license plate as you run a red light. Again, entirely my fault and I completely deserve whatever punishment is coming my way.

So, I just got a citation AND got red light cam'd in the span of 30 minutes. What has my life come to? I genuinely wish I could just stop existing. I wish I could just disappear and not have to deal with this. My parents are probably going to disown me.

I know it doesn't seem that bad to most, but I'm literally sick to my stomach because the most I've ever been in trouble was when I stole my mom's debit card and spent $15 when I was a kid. Now I'm literally in a ton of legal trouble and will probably get my license and car anally fisted by both my parents and the government. Can't wait!

I hope someone out there can laugh at my pain or at least give me some advice. I'm not sure how to tell my extremely impulsive parents who'll probably yoink their car from me and leave me with no transportation. Also, I have never seen the inside of a court room. Wish me luck.
TL;DR: On my way home from work late at night, got pulled over, got a citation, and then got red light cam'd. Parent's car, not mine. They're gonna kill me. fuck.
submitted by XEcksDeeD to tifu [link] [comments]

2020.08.16 11:07 InsiderMemeBot Camera inside anal

TOP TRADERS ##Overall Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | 1  | u/Gasenos | 225135 | 11 | u/mistermuesli | 38664 | 21 | u/matuhx | 15414 | 31 | u/Olipop999 | 10430 | 41 | u/JetZflare25 | 7100 | 2 | u/sponge_hitler | 151424 | 12 | u/BlitzTaco | 37379 | 22 | u/KushPatil | 15164 | 32 | u/2D_DoS | 10252 | 42 | u/FoxTrotPlays | 6656 | 3 | u/rad302 | 86964 | 13 | u/razhagever | 30124 | 23 | u/dhtikna | 14947 | 33 | u/Allonsy_11 | 9493 | 43 | u/aemanthefox | 6397 | 4 | u/chaosgiantmemes | 82232 | 14 | u/Hangzhounike | 26045 | 24 | u/acidcomplex_ | 14002 | 34 | u/CyberDalek6401 | 9211 | 44 | u/ibwitmypigeons | 6343 | 5 | u/iamscythed | 64008 | 15 | u/CritzD | 23419 | 25 | u/ncroney12 | 13654 | 35 | u/GnelforGnoblin | 9175 | 45 | u/Zeetelli | 6323 | 6 | u/3D_Guernsey | 51861 | 16 | u/MyNameSpaghette | 21106 | 26 | u/occultmoon | 13130 | 36 | u/blaZikeN_257 | 9136 | 46 | u/Zombiepixlz-gamr | 5910 | 7 | u/Useless_Archives | 48050 | 17 | u/rosesan | 19065 | 27 | u/Umber0010 | 13028 | 37 | u/Plastic_Pinocchio | 8824 | 47 | u/myownwildthoughts | 5846 | 8 | u/Doses_of_Happiness | 46608 | 18 | u/NovaAge | 17100 | 28 | u/Kermit_Ur_Life | 11992 | 38 | u/NervigerWutbuerger | 8689 | 48 | u/Sonorational | 5585 | 9 | u/pineapple_overlord | 41846 | 19 | u/PosterQ | 16599 | 29 | u/Regis_Casillas | 11743 | 39 | u/multipurposeflame | 8210 | 49 | u/ab_385 | 5238 |
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Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score
1  u/Gasenos 63467 11 u/BlitzTaco 7525 21 u/FoxTrotPlays 4619 31 u/PosterQ 3328 41 u/CrispyRoastedDuck 2501
2 u/rad302 25634 12 u/MemeCalendar 7448 22 u/rosesan 4473 32 u/CyberDalek6401 3314 42 u/Delicious_Peters_III 2448
3 u/chaosgiantmemes 19422 13 u/mistermuesli 5901 23 u/KushPatil 4284 33 u/Umber0010 3012 43 u/Kermit_Ur_Life 2414
4 u/pineapple_overlord 17501 14 u/Useless_Archives 5709 24 u/matuhx 4170 34 u/dhtikna 3002 44 u/CaptinCookies 2391
5 u/sponge_hitler 16548 15 u/Sonorational 5502 25 u/_Open_Your_Mind_ 4148 35 u/666thSuprisedPikachu 2828 45 u/Regis_Casillas 2369
6 u/iamscythed 14686 16 u/Zombiepixlz-gamr 5425 26 u/NovaAge 3852 36 u/MrEpicXD 2787 46 u/NervigerWutbuerger 2319
7 u/3D_Guernsey 11334 17 u/Hangzhounike 5211 27 u/JetZflare25 3807 37 u/ncroney12 2736 47 u/CodyGriffin 2297
8 u/Doses_of_Happiness 10636 18 u/acidcomplex_ 4752 28 u/Hammerman305 3529 38 u/Neoquem45_Yt 2731 48 u/MarioThePumer 2249
9 u/Allonsy_11 9141 19 u/GinjaNinjaYT 4706 29 u/superstonks 3513 39 u/occultmoon 2690 49 u/blaZikeN_257 2182
10 u/Ralle1998 8085 20 u/CritzD 4691 30 u/c0mp0op3r 3495 40 u/Azuridus 2673 50 u/MyNameSpaghette 2125
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1  u/Gasenos 161668 11 u/razhagever 30124 21 u/dhtikna 11945 31 u/CodyGriffin 9097 41 u/anal__penetration 4824
2 u/sponge_hitler 134876 12 u/BlitzTaco 29854 22 u/matuhx 11244 32 u/Plastic_Pinocchio 8777 42 u/ibwitmypigeons 4590
3 u/chaosgiantmemes 62810 13 u/pineapple_overlord 24345 23 u/ncroney12 10918 33 u/2D_DoS 8172 43 u/Zeetelli 4512
4 u/rad302 61330 14 u/Hangzhounike 20834 24 u/KushPatil 10880 34 u/GnelforGnoblin 7325 44 u/CourierMTF 4032
5 u/iamscythed 49322 15 u/MyNameSpaghette 18981 25 u/occultmoon 10440 35 u/blaZikeN_257 6954 45 u/Th3AlphaPooch 4007
6 u/Useless_Archives 42341 16 u/CritzD 18728 26 u/Olipop999 10430 36 u/multipurposeflame 6604 46 u/Some_dumb_mexican 3512
7 u/3D_Guernsey 40527 17 u/SubsubatomicGuy 16363 27 u/Umber0010 10016 37 u/aemanthefox 6396 47 u/ab_385 3500
8 u/Doses_of_Happiness 35972 18 u/rosesan 14592 28 u/Kermit_Ur_Life 9578 38 u/NervigerWutbuerger 6370 48 u/ChisTurtle 3392
9 u/mistermuesli 32763 19 u/PosterQ 13271 29 u/Regis_Casillas 9374 39 u/CyberDalek6401 5897 49 u/JetZflare25 3293
10 u/Ralle1998 32124 20 u/NovaAge 13248 30 u/acidcomplex_ 9250 40 u/myownwildthoughts 5846 50 u/Bobbyperson 3160
Templates Examples
1: I have high hopes for this format 1: Madlad(y) caught on camera - Open for investment
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2: Hopefully this one takes off 2: [No Data](No Data)
    Author: u/walletsalt     Author: u/No Data
    Score: 313     Score: 0
3: PewDiePie wanting to do dirty things with it 3: [No Data](No Data)
    Author: u/Darkmaster666666     Author: u/No Data
    Score: 5     Score: 0
This week
1: Mulan-more arrows 1: Can you don't?
    Author: u/Gasenos     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 876     Score: 20777
2: I have high hopes for this format 2: Acceptable
    Author: u/chonkier     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 815     Score: 15147
3: Good suggestion undermined by the same community 3: It’s been fun
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    Score: 754     Score: 10939
This month
1: Most beautiful goddess template 1: Some told me to do it
    Author: u/CyberDalek6401     Author: u/Ralle1998
    Score: 1128     Score: 40154
2: Madagascar 2- jebait 2: One day we will get to the point where people apreciate new templates
    Author: u/Gasenos     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 976     Score: 39243
3: elderly couple hugging each other through plastic wrap 3: It's never ready
    Author: u/Artegis     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 938     Score: 23656
This Year
1: New Sonic movie template 1: Let's spend some time together
    Author: u/Spudtastic-Spastic     Author: u/rad302
    Score: 1616     Score: 92780
2: An Upgrade 2: Lord of the rings
    Author: u/0Markus0     Author: u/rad302
    Score: 1533     Score: 60488
3: I see potential 3: Some told me to do it
    Author: u/beepboopbebop13     Author: u/Ralle1998
    Score: 1489     Score: 40154
All Time
1: New Sonic movie template 1: The gif that started it all
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    Score: 1616     Score: 99404
2: Credit to u/mallow_dip 2: I once called Hulk Shrek.
    Author: u/Yemris     Author: u/Shiteingann
    Score: 1614     Score: 97200
3: An Upgrade 3: Let's spend some time together
    Author: u/0Markus0     Author: u/rad302
    Score: 1533     Score: 92780
submitted by InsiderMemeBot to InsiderMemeTrading [link] [comments]

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TOP TRADERS ##Overall Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | Ranking | Name | Score | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | :------:|:-----|:----- | 1  | u/Gasenos | 225135 | 11 | u/mistermuesli | 38664 | 21 | u/matuhx | 15414 | 31 | u/Olipop999 | 10430 | 41 | u/JetZflare25 | 7100 | 2 | u/sponge_hitler | 151424 | 12 | u/BlitzTaco | 37379 | 22 | u/KushPatil | 15164 | 32 | u/2D_DoS | 10252 | 42 | u/FoxTrotPlays | 6656 | 3 | u/rad302 | 86964 | 13 | u/razhagever | 30124 | 23 | u/dhtikna | 14947 | 33 | u/Allonsy_11 | 9493 | 43 | u/aemanthefox | 6397 | 4 | u/chaosgiantmemes | 82232 | 14 | u/Hangzhounike | 26045 | 24 | u/acidcomplex_ | 14002 | 34 | u/CyberDalek6401 | 9211 | 44 | u/ibwitmypigeons | 6343 | 5 | u/iamscythed | 64008 | 15 | u/CritzD | 23419 | 25 | u/ncroney12 | 13654 | 35 | u/GnelforGnoblin | 9175 | 45 | u/Zeetelli | 6323 | 6 | u/3D_Guernsey | 51861 | 16 | u/MyNameSpaghette | 21106 | 26 | u/occultmoon | 13130 | 36 | u/blaZikeN_257 | 9136 | 46 | u/Zombiepixlz-gamr | 5910 | 7 | u/Useless_Archives | 48050 | 17 | u/rosesan | 19065 | 27 | u/Umber0010 | 13028 | 37 | u/Plastic_Pinocchio | 8824 | 47 | u/myownwildthoughts | 5846 | 8 | u/Doses_of_Happiness | 46608 | 18 | u/NovaAge | 17100 | 28 | u/Kermit_Ur_Life | 11992 | 38 | u/NervigerWutbuerger | 8689 | 48 | u/Sonorational | 5585 | 9 | u/pineapple_overlord | 41846 | 19 | u/PosterQ | 16599 | 29 | u/Regis_Casillas | 11743 | 39 | u/multipurposeflame | 8210 | 49 | u/ab_385 | 5238 |
10 | u/Ralle1998 | 40209 | 20 | u/SubsubatomicGuy | 16363 | 30 | u/CodyGriffin | 11394 | 40 | u/MemeCalendar | 7448 | 50 | u/CourierMTF | 5042 | Top Crafters
Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score Ranking Name Score
1  u/Gasenos 63467 11 u/BlitzTaco 7525 21 u/FoxTrotPlays 4619 31 u/PosterQ 3328 41 u/CrispyRoastedDuck 2501
2 u/rad302 25634 12 u/MemeCalendar 7448 22 u/rosesan 4473 32 u/CyberDalek6401 3314 42 u/Delicious_Peters_III 2448
3 u/chaosgiantmemes 19422 13 u/mistermuesli 5901 23 u/KushPatil 4284 33 u/Umber0010 3012 43 u/Kermit_Ur_Life 2414
4 u/pineapple_overlord 17501 14 u/Useless_Archives 5709 24 u/matuhx 4170 34 u/dhtikna 3002 44 u/CaptinCookies 2391
5 u/sponge_hitler 16548 15 u/Sonorational 5502 25 u/_Open_Your_Mind_ 4148 35 u/666thSuprisedPikachu 2828 45 u/Regis_Casillas 2369
6 u/iamscythed 14686 16 u/Zombiepixlz-gamr 5425 26 u/NovaAge 3852 36 u/MrEpicXD 2787 46 u/NervigerWutbuerger 2319
7 u/3D_Guernsey 11334 17 u/Hangzhounike 5211 27 u/JetZflare25 3807 37 u/ncroney12 2736 47 u/CodyGriffin 2297
8 u/Doses_of_Happiness 10636 18 u/acidcomplex_ 4752 28 u/Hammerman305 3529 38 u/Neoquem45_Yt 2731 48 u/MarioThePumer 2249
9 u/Allonsy_11 9141 19 u/GinjaNinjaYT 4706 29 u/superstonks 3513 39 u/occultmoon 2690 49 u/blaZikeN_257 2182
10 u/Ralle1998 8085 20 u/CritzD 4691 30 u/c0mp0op3r 3495 40 u/Azuridus 2673 50 u/MyNameSpaghette 2125
Top Distributors
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1  u/Gasenos 161668 11 u/razhagever 30124 21 u/dhtikna 11945 31 u/CodyGriffin 9097 41 u/anal__penetration 4824
2 u/sponge_hitler 134876 12 u/BlitzTaco 29854 22 u/matuhx 11244 32 u/Plastic_Pinocchio 8777 42 u/ibwitmypigeons 4590
3 u/chaosgiantmemes 62810 13 u/pineapple_overlord 24345 23 u/ncroney12 10918 33 u/2D_DoS 8172 43 u/Zeetelli 4512
4 u/rad302 61330 14 u/Hangzhounike 20834 24 u/KushPatil 10880 34 u/GnelforGnoblin 7325 44 u/CourierMTF 4032
5 u/iamscythed 49322 15 u/MyNameSpaghette 18981 25 u/occultmoon 10440 35 u/blaZikeN_257 6954 45 u/Th3AlphaPooch 4007
6 u/Useless_Archives 42341 16 u/CritzD 18728 26 u/Olipop999 10430 36 u/multipurposeflame 6604 46 u/Some_dumb_mexican 3512
7 u/3D_Guernsey 40527 17 u/SubsubatomicGuy 16363 27 u/Umber0010 10016 37 u/aemanthefox 6396 47 u/ab_385 3500
8 u/Doses_of_Happiness 35972 18 u/rosesan 14592 28 u/Kermit_Ur_Life 9578 38 u/NervigerWutbuerger 6370 48 u/ChisTurtle 3392
9 u/mistermuesli 32763 19 u/PosterQ 13271 29 u/Regis_Casillas 9374 39 u/CyberDalek6401 5897 49 u/JetZflare25 3293
10 u/Ralle1998 32124 20 u/NovaAge 13248 30 u/acidcomplex_ 9250 40 u/myownwildthoughts 5846 50 u/Bobbyperson 3160
Templates Examples
1: I have high hopes for this format 1: shut the F*** UP, sprinkles!
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    Score: 815     Score: 58
2: PewDiePie wanting to do dirty things with it 2: oh my, would you look at the time
    Author: u/Darkmaster666666     Author: u/ChemicalHoneydew
    Score: 5     Score: 32
3: Interested cat looking at annoyed cat 3: Madlad(y) caught on camera - Open for investment
    Author: u/shadowbl4de_     Author: u/TheWiskeredCat
    Score: 2     Score: 1
This week
1: Mulan-more arrows 1: Can you don't?
    Author: u/Gasenos     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 876     Score: 20777
2: I have high hopes for this format 2: Acceptable
    Author: u/chonkier     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 815     Score: 15147
3: Good suggestion undermined by the same community 3: It’s been fun
    Author: u/KlerWatchCo     Author: u/Plastic_Pinocchio
    Score: 754     Score: 10939
This month
1: Most beautiful goddess template 1: Some told me to do it
    Author: u/CyberDalek6401     Author: u/Ralle1998
    Score: 1128     Score: 40154
2: Madagascar 2- jebait 2: One day we will get to the point where people apreciate new templates
    Author: u/Gasenos     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 976     Score: 39243
3: elderly couple hugging each other through plastic wrap 3: It's never ready
    Author: u/Artegis     Author: u/Gasenos
    Score: 938     Score: 23656
This Year
1: New Sonic movie template 1: Let's spend some time together
    Author: u/Spudtastic-Spastic     Author: u/rad302
    Score: 1616     Score: 92780
2: An Upgrade 2: Lord of the rings
    Author: u/0Markus0     Author: u/rad302
    Score: 1533     Score: 60488
3: I see potential 3: Some told me to do it
    Author: u/beepboopbebop13     Author: u/Ralle1998
    Score: 1489     Score: 40154
All Time
1: New Sonic movie template 1: The gif that started it all
    Author: u/Spudtastic-Spastic     Author: u/Whymanwhy12
    Score: 1616     Score: 99404
2: Credit to u/mallow_dip 2: I once called Hulk Shrek.
    Author: u/Yemris     Author: u/Shiteingann
    Score: 1614     Score: 97200
3: An Upgrade 3: Let's spend some time together
    Author: u/0Markus0     Author: u/rad302
    Score: 1533     Score: 92780
submitted by InsiderMemeBot to InsiderMemeTrading [link] [comments]

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2020.08.03 13:15 LordGrimby Camera inside anal

NSFW Disclaimer: This story is intended as parody. All characters and situations contained herein are their respective owners. This story contains adult content and not intended to be read by persons under the age of 18. The story contains non consensual sex, rape, oral, anal, mind control, slavery, gangbang, alien sex. This story is strictly fantasy and readers should not attempt to duplicate, mimic or otherwise take inspiration from this story for real like application. This story is intended as parody.
(Note to reader: this story is a continuation of the Mojo: Sex = Ratings series started by Hamster. This story was recovered from the now defunct - all credit to the original author(s))
Fantastic FouStar Wars: Mojo - Sex = Ratings Part 2 by Cholager
Click, click, click, click, click, click. Surrounded by a plethora of blinking flashing television screens, a multitude of entertainment options, broadcasting the shows of the Mojoverse. The fact of the matter was, with all these tired banal retreads, Mojo was getting quite bored with television. His hand continued clicking aimlessly, hoping beyond hope that he would find something of worth on the boob tube. Those pesky X-men were always good for some amusement, ripping them from their universe and plopping them into the latest Mojo concoction, messing with their mental and physical selves to suit the wants and desires of the Mojoverse viewership. But, alas, the X-men had lost their allure; too many bizarre adventures had run the well dry and their escapades were now more than a little stale. Banal might be a better word.The (mis)adventures of the X-men had been exhausted of possibilities. Mojo would have to find more suitable subjects elsewhere, but where?
One of the screens was a direct feed from one of the security cameras in the Baxter Building, home of the illustrious superteam, the Fantastic Four. Mojo watched with interest as Reed Richards dismissed his wife's pleas for affection. On another screen, a rerun of Return of the Jedi.
Hmmm Mojo mused, the gears in his twisted mind turning. Eureka! The Fantastic Four would do quite nicely; they were classic heroes, ageless and timeless and no amount of tinkering and futzing and bad storytelling would ever cause them to lose their luster. Well, perhaps the period when the Invisible Woman ran around dressed in nothing more than a slutty peekaboo that showcased her ample bosom and cleavage had caused some of their luster to be diminished, but now they had restored their status as the premier super team. Susan Richards would serve quite nicely in Mojo's latest feature...
One moment Sue was seated at her computer, chatting girl talk over the Internet with the Wasp, complaining about Reed's lack of attentiveness, and the next she was transported as if by magic to a dank dungeon surrounded by hordes of motley aliens, all grotesque, monstrous and barbaric. She felt a roomful of leering eyes on her body. In front of her was a gigantic slug of a creature, slimy and disgusting, with evil thin slits for eyes, and a gaping maw, out of which, a glistening tongue. It's stubby arms and fingers grasped at the air eagerly at the presence of it's new prize. It was none other than Jabba the hutt. Sue couldn't begin to contemplate how she had been thrust into such a bizarre situation, being the distaff member of the Fantastic Four she had gotten used to these kinds of things. She looked down at herself and saw what all the aliens and Jabba had been staring at; she was clad in skimpy slave wear: a revealing bronze bikini and a chain hung loosely around her waist that held a swishy red drape between her legs in front and back. Her long sexy gams were showcased in all their gorgeous glory. Sue had to be careful when she moved, lest her flowing skirt allow a glimpse of her pantyless crotch, her bare bottom, her blonde bush. Her midriff was completely bare, her flat washboard tummy exposed, her sexy belly button a cock stimulating sight. There was a metal collar tight around her neck attached to a chain, the other end of which was clutched in Jabba's toying grip. She recognized the garb as Princess Leia's slave outfit. Was this what she was: Jabba's love slave? Sue was sickened and repulsed at the thought. Strangely enough she had retained her wedding band.
"What have you done to me!" Sue barked. "Return me to my universe immediately!"
She was treated with a chorus of laughter, boos and jeers.
[Quiet!] Jabba ordered in the language of the Hutts. [You exist to serve me and please me! I will not suffer insolence.] With that, Jabba tugged on the chain roughly pulling Sue off her feet and up against his wormy body. Her tits were smashed against his girth and the back of her skirt had blown aside offering the gallery of minions an unadulterated look at her sweet white ass. Sue squirmed against Jabba, held down by his grip, trying to use her powers to no avail, it was as if they had been stripped from her, all the while the hordes of the dungeon cheered and delighted at her waggling ass.
It's no good, Sue thought, my powers are gone.
Jabba nudged Sue's chin with his greasy hand. [My, you are a beautiful specimen. I shall enjoy you greatly.]
"You're a pig," Sue spat.
SLAP! Jabba backhanded her with a surprising quickness. He pulled Sue up close to his face. [You'll soon learn to appreciate me, slut.] His tongue came rolling out of his fat mouth, sliming Sue's face, degrading her in front of his peons. Jabba licked her face all over, coating Sue's soft skin with his gooey translucent spit.
Jabba tossed Sue unceremoniously onto the floor. She landed in a heap and flashed a defiant look back at her monstrous captor. Jabba reveled in her spunky strength. [She is a feisty one. I will enjoy making her mine.]
Out of the corner of her eyes Sue saw Reed and Ben in shackles being led away, no doubt to one of the lower dungeon cells. She wanted to call out to her teammates but the din of the mob would have drowned out her screams.
[Dance], Jabba ordered, his tongue lolling lasciviously in anticipation. He wanted to see this sexy hot busty blonde in sensual motion. Sue balked, trembling in fear and the ugliness of her situation. She couldn't stand the thought of all these grotesque aliens, Jabba in particular, ogling her hot body as she performed an exotic dance for them, their minds filled with delicious visions of fucking her and using her. Sue didn't want to degrade herself by being the exotic human plaything of their fuck fantasies. [If you care for your friends, you will obey me with all your heart.]
Sue knew she had no choice. Jabba was a merciless cutthroat and he wouldn’t hesitate to kill Reed and Ben if she failed to comply. Jabba cued up the Max Rebo band and the lights of his palace were turned center stage to Sue. Sue took a deep breath and summoned her concentration; she had to survive this nightmare somehow.
She closed her eyes and thrust her chest forward, her firm full tits straining against the dancer bra, brazenly prominent. The aliens whooped and cheered at the marvelous sight. Sue brought her shoulders close, forming a fantastic cleavage and the shouts of acclaim only increased in volume.
The bizarre alien music started, and Sue shook her hips sensually, rolling them from side to side in a swooning, undulating motion, as if inviting cocks to enter her woman sheath with a mating dance borne out of fertility rites. She began moving to the music, pushing her pelvis forward in lewd sexual gestures, shaking her chest so her boobs jiggled enticingly. Sue danced with wild abandon, tossing her head back and forth as if in ecstasy, shaking her hips side to side, bending over and wagging her tail and rocking her shoulders back and forth. She was giving it all she had, and she could have been putting on the best floor show anyone had ever seen, spreading her legs wide in iron horse stance and moving side to side, undulating all around, using her body in a wild way that could only by the dance embodiment of hot, rough, animal sex.
Sue shook and swayed her body around like she was in complete command of her sensuality; she seemed to Jabba and the rest of his palace court that she was an angel of lust and innocence come to Tatooine in shimmering real form. The whole hall was transfixed at Sue's body poetry; she was putting on a cock stiffening performance for the ages. Watching her long legs move, her pillowy jumblies heaving as she danced, her tight ass moving so invitingly, gave all onlookers rock hard erections. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villany than Jabba's palace, filled with intergalactic criminals with the death sentence on twelve systems. Murderers, rapists, madmen, ganglards, bounty hunters, they were all here, eyes on Sue and licking their lips, mentally undressing her, fondling her, raping her. They all wanted a piece of the angelic superheroine turned slave.
But Jabba wanted her most of all. He rubbed his stiff cock in anticipation. Sue was really getting into the exotic dance; she was practically making love to herself on the middle of the floor, rubbing her breasts enticingly, grabbing her crotch, sucking her fingers, running her hands up and down her legs, hips, ass, and side. Jabba had to have her now; she was in a state of frenzied arousal and there would never be a better time for Jabba to break her in as his fuckslut slave. He reeled Sue in, her writhing, dancing body against his massive corpulence.
[Leave me!] Jabba ordered his minions. [I wish to be alone with my new pet.]
The room quickly emptied, as the crowd knew well Jabba's quick temper and furious rage. More than one unlucky soul had suffered the fate of the Rancor due to Jabba's tempestuous temperament.
[Forget your husband] Jabba slithered, caressing Sue's breasts. [He is nothing more than a memory to you now. He may be your husband but Jabba is your master. I own your body, your tits, your pussy, your sweet ass. You can forget your husband, there is no hope of ever being reunited. Susan, you belong to Jabba now!!]
Sue tried to dismiss the fat blob's words from her mind but they repeated themselves over and over internally. Jabba did own her, she had no powers, she had no way of escaping. She wondered if she should just give in to the evil worm's dominance. Tears ran down her face as she contemplated her horrible fate: to be raped by the foul, repugnant Hutt.
Jabba began molesting her and fondling her and Sue went limp and numb, unable to fully believe what was happening. Sue gave in to Jabba's groping, allowing him to have his way with her pliant bod. Jabba popped her skimpy bronze bikini off, tossing it off to the side nonchalantly and squeezed her full juicy boobs, toying with them as if they were his own personal playthings, which all things considered, they were.
Jabba reveled in fucking other being's wives; as a ganglord on Tatooine, he had the power to fuck the females he chose, whether through bribery, intimidation or extortion. Many a man unable to pay his gambling debts was forced to watch in horror as his wife was savagely porked by Jabba as restitution. Smugglers who dumped cargo in fear of Imperial trouble had their wives banged by Jabba's fat stubby cock until their pussies were so stretched out they couldn't handle anybody but Jabba. Jabba had his share of hot slutty wives but Sue was the hottest slutwife of them all.
[Salacious Crumb] Jabba called. [Loosen the dancer up.]
Sue was fingered by the filthy goblin jester, Salacious Crumb. The beast took great delight in jamming it's long slender fingers into Sue's pussy. He sucked on her tats and laughed in a high shrilly voice. The defilement of her pussy was coming soon, Sue realized, even as Salacious molested her and jerked his stringy cock off onto her back, laughing maliciously as he did.
Sue's cunt was nicely loosened up, the wetness coming involuntarily, Sue wondering why her body was betraying her. Jabba's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when he saw Sue's pussy, glistening pink and looking fresh fine and fuckable. Jabba's cock was easily a foot long, a stubby slimy thing that seemed to almost resemble him in a miniature sort of way. Sue couldn’t even comprehend that monstrous tool entering her.
[HARLOT! I will enjoy you greatly] Jabba chuckled, picking Sue up like she was no more than a doll and maneuvering her to his gigantic prick.
"no please," Sue whimpered. "don't do this, please..."
Jabba giggled at her pathetic pleas and violently planted Sue on his cock, so that they were facing each other, impaling himself deep into her pussy. Sue groaned as she was roughly penetrated and used. His grubby hands squashed themselves around her thin waist and he began forcing Sue up and down on his thick slimy cock. Sue tossed her head in torment, as she was defiled by the disgusting mound of corpulence known as Jabba the hutt. Jabba worked his cock in and out of her tight lovetunnel, slamming his dong into Sue's sweet velvety pussy, lifting her up the length of his shaft and then slamming her all the way down the massive stalk. Jabba's slimy hands held Sue surprisingly tight and he continued using her as he pleased, bouncing her up and down on his impaling cock. Sue tried scrambling away but Jabba would not allow it, grabbing her shoulders and plopping her back onto his pussy-slimed cock. Sue had gotten all her pussy juices and wetness over Jabba's naturally greasy cock, so that she was fucked smoothly, riding a lubricated dong.
[You're not going anywhere STRUMPET!!!] Jabba laughed.
Sue grimaced as Jabba continued raping her, forcing her onto his cock over and over and over and over, it felt like it would never end. Sue grunted as Jabba took his fill of her cunt; he was using just like he used all the slave girls, just like he used Princess Leia. He had a taste for human pussy, a liking that he never stopped craving for.
Sue couldn't even make out intelligible words as she was being raped; she wanted to scream out for Jabba to stop, but she was overcome with every thrust of cock into her. She could only moan softly and grunt in discomfort as she rode the loathsome slug in revulsion. Without her powers there was nothing she could do to stop Jabba's cock assault.
Jabba grabbed her tits and started molesting them with his eager fingers, squeezing them and having his way with them, feeling up her heaving funbags. Sue had tits like milkjugs and Jabba was salivating to sample her succulent melons. Jabba slathered his tongue across Sue's chest, covering her bosom with nasty saliva. He sucked on her tasty tats, taking them whole into his mouth and letting his tongue rub all over, teasing Sue's nipples, licking the tops of her tits then undersides all around. He took each tit in turn into his giant mouth, manipulating each in turn, then both of then, sucking with all his might on her rock hard titties. Sue's breasts had never been fondled and ladled attention in such a way before, certainly not by her conservative husband, and it was driving her wild. An agonizing ecstasy ripped through her body, and try as she might to control it, she had a full out, mindblowing orgasm that sent ripples through her whole self, her pussy spasming madly on Jabba's cock. Sue uttered a guttural cry as her body was wracked with throes of pleasure and all of her pussy juice came streaming out and bathing Jabba’s cock inside her.
With her pussy clutching like a horny bitch onto his cock, Jabba could no longer hold back the floodgates, he slammed Sue all the way down on his cock, his towering prick boring into Sue and touching parts no normal human could ever reach, and then he blew his white hot load into Sue, sending volley after volley of Jabba's juice into the helpless human female. Sue's face scrunched up in humiliated degradation as Jabba filled her womb with his nasty sticky seed. Jabba kept pumping away, emptying his nutsac into Sue’s tight cooze. As he pumped away, he swathed his tongue all over Sue, her tits, all over her face, in the Hutt gesture of adoration. Sue couldn't have been more defiled and humiliated. The mighty superheroine brought low by being raped by the odious, repulsive, disgustingly slimy, sickeningly fat worm ganglord Jabba the Hutt.
[SLUT!!!] Jabba tossed Sue aside, having finished having his way with her. She landed in a heap. Jabba tucked his cock back underneath his folds of fat and slithered away.
That night, Susan Richards the Invisible Woman slept by Jabba's side- after their hot sweaty union, she had earned the designation of his personal fuckslave. She awoke to the revolting sight of Jabba slobbering down a breakfast of chitinous insects. She turned her head away in disgust but Jabba was feeling horny after his meal so he grabbed Sue's ass, insinuating his desire for intercourse.
[COME HITHER WENCH] he croaked, jerking her leash, the collar choking her each time he did so.
Sue sighed; she had to do her duty lest her teammates suffer harsh consequences. This time she would be a little more willing, perhaps the sex might even be bearable and she might be able to find the least little bit of pleasure in it. Sue got down on her hands and knees for Jabba and spread her legs as if inviting entry. She had adopted the posture of slave quite quickly; Jabba's prick often had that effect on sluts. Jabba took her doggie style rapidly, pummeling his meat into her hole.
"Unnnhhhh!!! Ohhh ohhh uhhhh..." Sue grunted, letting the ganglord slide his meatstick into her woman sheath like it was just a hole. It was an incredible sight, a mammoth ten ton slug porking a hot tight superheroine body (34d-24-33) that could have weighed no more than 120 lbs.
[You are a SLUT!]
"No... I love my husband... Reed... I'm only doing this for him..." Sue huffed as she moved her body in time to Jabba's strokes. Jabba increased the pace of his fuck thrusts, using Sue in a more solicitous fashion.
[You lie slut, you love my big fat cock inside you]
"Nooo... It's not true... I'm a good wife... I would never do anything to hurt Reed... oh goddddd..." cried Sue, her voice a mixture of whining denial and reluctant ecstasy. Jabba began humping harder into her defenseless body. Sue's warm wet pussy seemed to be enjoying the hard banging, accepting Jabba's cock with intimate fervor.
[Your pussy tells me otherwise. Your pussy wants my cock, it responds so nicely to the attention I give it, deep down you are nothing more than a fuckstarved harlot, isn't that so...] Jabba gave her hard vicious pumps.
"Noooo... oh god... unhhhh... right there...oh you hit my spot it feels so good..."
[Beg for it TROLLOP.]
"Please don't make me, oh god please don't make me... oh god so good..."
Jabba fucked her with a violent impaling thrust. Sue's body shuddered, her juicy bongos flopping about with every pump.
[Beg for my cock wench or I might not give it to you.]
"No don't... please give it to me"
Jabba slapped her ass flanks, while banging her, holing her out [Let me hear it SLUT!!!]
"Oh fuck me Jabba I need it so bad, Reed doesn't pay any attention to me, I need to be fucked nasty so badly!!!! God, fuck me Jabba, fuck me!"
[That's right whore] Jabba grunted, a grin forming across his wide mouth.
"I need it so bad; I need your big bad cock inside meeee..."
Jabba pumped her hard and Sue was loving it, at least her body was, it was writhing on his cock like it couldn't get enough.
[You are a nasty cockwhore slutwife.]
Tears streamed down Sue's face.
[Tell me] Jabba ordered.
"I am a nasty cockwhore slutwife... I live for other men's cocks... I live for your cock, Jabba..." Sue admitted. Her heart sank as she uttered those words; the thought of Reed seeing his lovely, adoring wife being banged by the grotesque slimeball blew Sue's mind. She was a slut for Jabba, she was enthralled at being his fucktoy, she loved his cock jamming into her. If Reed knew of her slutty behavior he would cast her off, call her dirty names and leave her, but the fact of the matter was Sue just didn't care anymore, all she cared about was having as much of Jabba's cock inside her and fucking her as long as possible.
[Your pussy belongs to me.]
"You own my pussy, Jabba!" Sue and Jabba were locked in hot embrace, engaged in their hot nasty intercourse and each loving it.
[Who is your master?]
"Oh god!!!! You are my master Jabba"
[What is your role?]
"To serve as your everloving fuck slave and please you sexually in any way possible..." Sue was ashamed to say those words, she was still Reed's wife, she still wore his ring, but she was not his woman, she was Jabba's woman to use as he pleased and it was a relief to her to get if off her chest.
[Beg me for my come]
"Please..." Sue pleaded. She did want his jism inside her, filling her up.
[Louder CUNT!!!]
"Fuck me Jabba, come into my tight pussy, fuck me so bad, shoot all your nasty sputum into my hot cunt!!!"
Susan felt Jabba's cock bulge inside her with the promise of ejaculation. Jabba pulled Sue's chain tight, keeping her on his cock, but Sue wouldn’t have it any other way. His tongue swathed her sexy back in slime.
[This is your purpose in life, COMEDUMP]
"I want it so bad!!!"
[Take it all, fantastic slut!!!]
Jabba pumped his load into her, filling her with his nasty gooey Jabba jism. Sue, in turn, her pussy climaxing and spasming, contracting violently, milked Jabba's cock for all it was worth, trying to squeeze every last drop of come out of the worm's worm. Jabba shook Sue back and forth, rocking her around on his cock as he rocked her world, dumping his come in her in pulsating ropes of goo.
Bib Fortunata led the dark cloaked figure into the atrium of Jabba's Palace. It was morning and Jabba and his minions were awoken to the presence of a stranger in there midst. Susan was roused from her dream reverie by a heeding tug on her collar chain. She perked up instantly like a pet dog coming to attention, sitting up straight at Jabba's side.
The dark stranger lifted back the hood of his cloak to reveal a familiar face.
"Johnny!" Sue breathed. Upon hearing Sue's hopeful exclamation, Jabba eyed the stranger jealously and pulled Sue's chain roughly to reinforce her obedience.
"I seek an audience with Jabba the Hutt." Johnny declared.
[I am Jabba the Hutt. Who are you to trespass upon my demesnes with such brazenness? You are treading death, stranger.]
"My name is Johnny Storm, the Human Torch. I am a member of the Fantastic Four and you have captured my friends and family. I demand that you return them to me!" Johnny's eyes burned furiously when he glimpsed Sue clad in sex slave attire, no doubt forced to perform degrading sexual acts to please his master.
Jabba chuckled at the newcomer's insolence. [Do you truly expect me to part company with my new pet? I have become quite accustomed to her sexual charms. She has provided me with much erotic pleasure in her short time as my love slave. She is quite adept at lovemaking, quite enthusiastic as well. It is difficult to find such a satisfying slave in the galaxy; I won't let her go so easily. Plus, I think she has taken a liking to my fucking as well.] Sue’s face blushed dark crimson, the shame of Jabba's words and Johnny's presence humiliating her deeply.
"That's my sister!!!" Johnny seethed.
[Your sister is now my personal cunt. Why don't you show him your appreciation of me, slave. Kiss me] Jabba ordered.
"no, please..." Sue whimpered. "Not in front of Johnny..."
Sue's chain was yanked roughly, bringing her face to his. Jerking her around with the chain and collar was Jabba's way of reinforcing her submission. It made her realize her degraded position as his slave while physically commanding her. Once again, she had to submit. Sue kissed Jabba tenderly, harkening to fairy tales about beautiful princess kissing ugly toads, but the image soon turned grotesque as Jabba flicked his tongue out, stabbing at Sue's mouth and Sue accepted eagerly, sucking lewdly on his tongue. Jabba wrapped his stubby arms around Sue, his slimy skin against her bare ivory skin, drawing her in to the twisted embrace. Jabba licked Sue's face all over, bathing it in his gooey saliva and Sue accepted, nuzzling her face against the molesting tongue. Jabba's mouth was huge, so Sue had to settle for nipping at his upper lip, and she did, with a reckless sexualized abandon. Jabba pushed her away, even as Sue seemed to yearn for more, but his demonstration had been complete; he had shown Sue was his playslut.
Johnny hung his head in a defeated fashion; still, he did not come all this way to go home emptyhanded. He would rescue his Sue and Ben and Reed.
[Feed him to the rancor] Jabba ordered.
The floor beneath Johnny's feet gave way and as he fell to an uncertain fate, he realized his powers had left him. He could not flame on and fly to safety.
Sue watched with great concern as Johnny fell to his doom. She looked into the pit to see what was to become of him but Jabba pulled her close to him once again, caressing her beautiful face with his fingers.
[Let us adjourn, slave. His fate is of no matter to you. your only concern now is to give me pleasure.]
Sue nodded obediently. She would not see how Johnny fared. She walked into Jabba's private bedchambers with Jabba slithering behind, his hand clutching her chain leash.
[Service me, SLATTERN] Jabba pushed Sue to her knees, indicating his desire for fellatio. Sue acquiesced with out protest. Sue sucked Jabba's big fat cock like she was smoking a gigantic cigar, or trying to win a contest for swallowing the world's largest kielbasa. She was a fantastic cocksucker despite having never sucked her husband's cock. She had earned her training elsewhere. Her pretty blond head bobbed up and down, covering the shaft with her saliva. Jabba held her head onto his cock while he prepared to blow his load.
Sue gagged on the come as it shot into her mouth and down her throat; she hadn't realized Jabba was coming so soon. Jabba pulled out of her mouth and shot all over her face, letting his creamy load smear all over her precious face. Hutts had incredible sexual stamina not to mention they were capable of orgasming multiple times within a short span of time. Jabba was ready to violate her cunt now, his cock already stiffening up to it's former hardness. Dollops of sperm coated her lips and chin.
[Spread your legs, Susan Richards.] Sue brushed aside the flowing red drape and spread her long legs in a slutty pose, revealing a glimpse at her wonderful snatch.
[Spread your pussy lips for me.]
Sue nodded and reached between her legs, pulling her lips back and revealing fleshy pinkness. She was offering herself to Jabba. Jabba lined up his cock to her pussy and entered Sue, her body accepting the cock and tingling all over. Jabba the hutt began pumping his meat in and out of her slit, fucking her hard and nasty and Sue voiced her approval.
"Unnnh hhh yes Jabba, do me, pound my pussy..."
Jabba's monstrous cock was pistoning in and out of Sue with sharp thrusts, pulling all the way out slowly then drilling back in with the weight of Jabba's girth behind it. She had truly become Jabba's lovetoy. She was a sex slave pure and simple whose only purpose was to pleasure Jabba sexually.
"Oh use me Jabba, fuck me, use my pussy please!!!"
[You wanton whore! Have you forgotten your marriage vows? What about your husband? Did you not promise him you fidelity and undying devotion? Answer me SLUT!]
"ohhh fuck me... Reed means nothing to me now... all I care about is having your cock inside me, Jabba... I want you fucking me and using me….ohhh god..."
[What would your husband say if he saw you fucking another with such abandon, and a Hutt such as myself at that? His own wife fucking desperately, unable to get enough of Jabba's cock!!!]
"He'd... Unnhhh unnnh me a cheap slut..." Sue breathed, her body wracked by the fucking she got.
[How does that make you feel?]
" a dirty whore... ashamed of breaking my marital vows... like the sluttiest wife in the galaxy...oooo please fuck me... don't stop!!!"
Sue's hair was pulled roughly; Jabba wasn't using any restraint now, he was giving it to the blonde superheroine wifeslut as hard and rough and nasty as he could. Sue couldn't get enough of the rough stuff, she wanted to be used like a pliant fuckdoll. The room shook as if from an earthquake from Jabba’s cataclysmic fuck gyrations.
"I'm your slut, for you to use and fuck for as long as you want. The pussy I promised to Reed is yours now. I've needed someone, something, to tame me for so long, now I have your cock in me I know that it is you. Blow your wad inside me, Jabba!!!"
Jabba gargled as he unleashed a torrent of gushing spooge into Sue's hungry snatch; the human bitch was an exquisite fuck indeed. Sue lay on her back with a contented smile on her face, her pussy filled with Jabba's cream, her hands rubbing her belly in self satisfaction.
[You are nothing more than a cheap tawdry slut.]
Sue nodded, recognizing the truth.
The rest of the Fantastic Four were in the shock of their lives. Shackled and restrained by Jabba's guards, they were treated to the spectacle occurring in the middle of Jabba's hall. Jabba had planned a very special event for his prized pet, Sue, a way to satiate her now slutty desires, and he invited the lowliest of dregs from Tatooine.
At the moment Sue was double penetrated by two Gamorrean guards, green hog men warriors. They had her on her hands and knees, one taking her pussy from behind doggie style, the other using her mouth as Sue sucked vigorously. They both blew their loads inside Sue's holes.
All Reed, Ben and Johnny could do was watch as their beloved wife, sister, friend was gangbanged by the motley assortment of Jabba's alien court.
"Omigod, SUZIE!!" the Thing cried. Suzie was energetically fucking away with the denizens of Jabba's palace, shooting for the stature of princess slut of Tatooine. She was no longer Sue Richards, loving wife and mother, but Suzie the floozy, taking on all alien cocks, wifeslut alien slave and cunt available for use.
There must have been a hundred grotesque aliens surrounding her waiting to molest grope fuck her come all over her. Sue took them all in turn, she was nothing more than a greedy cum guzzling cockwhore now. She spread her legs and opened her mouth, accepting cock from all comers. As soon as a batch of beasties was done using her, her holes were quickly refilled by more cock. And Sue was loving the alien gangbang; it felt good to be used by the grizzled, frustrated alien scumbuckets, to be filled to the brim with their alien spunk. Sue was panting and groaning and moaning in heavenly lust, that is, when her mouth wasn't filled with alien dickmeat.
Salacious Crumb took Sue from behind, humping her frantically, while Sue oohed and aahed in base lust. Sue found her temporary respite when Salacious Crumb and blew his wad of stringy come into her belly.
Then Sue sucked Bib Fortunata off while riding Hammerhead's stalk cock, Hammerhead's slender fingers wrapped around her waist, Susan doing a slam dance, lubing the calamari cock in her mouth. She was the galaxy's biggest whore.
The Max Rebo Band had their turn porking Sue as well and they fucked her like they were playing their instruments; Sue was their sex instrument and her cries of fucklust were music to everybody's ears (those that had ears, anyway). She had her tits groped, her pussy rammed hard, and her face stuffed with cock. The alien band members took turns alternating their cocks in her pussy, passing her back and forth. In return, Sue played a fantastic skin flute for them. She smiled a glorious smile with gleaming white teeth just as they blew their loads into her body cavities, onto her face, neck, shoulders and tits. She lapped it all up eagerly.
Reed, Ben and Johnny had been driven mad seeing their lovely Sue abused and used like a cheap fuckdoll. They had however sported raging erections from watching the fuckfest and Jabba, in his own twisted perversity, had his other slave dancers (now that Jabba had Sue the others were irrelevant to him) perform fellatio on the shackled heroes while they watched Sue got rocked like a slut over and over.
Boba Fett wanted a piece of her hot ass and what Boba Fett wanted he got. The bounty hunter never failed to bring in his prey. He was the one, after all, to nab Reed Richards and encase him in carbonite. Now he wanted to encase his cock into Sue's ass. Boba Fett lined up his cock to her rosy asshole.
"The moment I laid eyes on you I figured you for a trollop. Looks like I was right," whispered Boba Fett into Sue's ears as he rammed his cockspear home into Sue's tight anus.
"OOOOHHHHH!!!!" Sue grimaced as her ass was rudely and roughly raped.
"I have now claimed the bounty on your asshole, my pretty!" Boba Fett reamed her rectum out with absolutely no regard for her desires; it was fitting given his merciless reputation as a bounty hunter. Sue could only stick her ass in the air and take the vicious assfuck. She rolled her hips, grinding it out, and losing herself in her degradation.
"Take it, you fucking Jabba-slut!!!" Boba Fett growled while slapping her ass. He plunged in deep and shot his sticky wad into her insides. Sue issued a sigh of orgasmic relief.
[Now, my turn] Jabba boomed. [I take you, my sweet blonde slut.]
Jabba saved himself for last. He gave Sue a fucking she would never forget. Jabba lay on his back while Sue rode his cock. Jabba controlled her like a sex puppet, using the chain attached to her collar to manipulate her up down and around, pulling her up and down on his cock like she was a fuckdoll. Sue was on the verge of choking to death, but the cock that rammed up into her, filled her up physically and emotionally. The erotic asphyxiation made their fucking ten times better.
[Such incredible tits] Jabba drooled as he toyed with her perky breasts.
"Yes..." Sue breathed. "Play with my tits. Knead them, use them..."
Jabba let the bitch ride him more, the slut enjoyed taking it from on top of the worm. Sue, slugslut that she was, craved Jabba's cock more than ever, even as she found him more detestable and repulsive than ever. It was a twisted need for Sue to be fucked in the lowliest way possible, that caused her to love being Jabba's sextoy.
Finally Jabba pushed her down, her back to the floor her legs pressed her shoulders, her ankles above her ears, and spewed deep inside her.
The alien fuck orgy was over and Sue had been the comedump of over a hundred alien scumbuckets. She had been fucked, raped, used by the vilest and most disgusting beings to travel the stars. She lay in the center of Jabba's dance floor, her entire body covered heat to toe in alien jizz, her pussy filled with sperm gunk and dripping out down her legs. She must have swallowed a gallon of various alien's spunk as well. Susan rolled over onto her back, her pussy stretched out, her body limp and battered from all the fuck thrusting, her tits practically mauled. Little did Sue know but growing inside her womb were a plethora of embryonic huttspawn. As she drifted off into unconsciousness a self-satisfied smile emerged on her face...
Watching his fantastic production on the giant MojoVision monitor, Mojo had masturbated himself dry. Sue's starring role as Jabba's slave girl had been a diverting and arousing experience if particularly nasty and bizarre. Still, the production had been hot enough to cause Mojo to blow his load several times. Mojo cleaned himself up and sighed in a self-gratified manner. He had another hit on his hands.
submitted by LordGrimby to jabbaleia [link] [comments]

2020.07.28 14:12 throwitallaway8787 My story of progressively worsening porn addiction, prison, and how I am still struggling every day. If you have started watching extreme porn, especially "younger" stuff like loli etc, please read this - it could save your life. Possible trigger warning.

I walked out of prison more than three years ago, and have really turned my life around. I have a wonderful girlfriend, a new house, and a great job...but I still struggle daily with porn, and in the past few months things have gotten really bad. This addiction does not simply go away. I posted this a few days ago in several other subs because I myself need serious help and didn't know where to turn, but I'm posting it here mostly because I think reading my story could actually help people. Also, it is helpful for me to hear that people can relate to my story.
If you've starting watching porn that makes you think, "I shouldn't be watching this", then you need to read this. You will continue to seek out more and more extreme porn, and could eventually find yourself in jail. Your entire life can turn upside-down in a millisecond, but right now you have the chance to turn it around.
I relapsed yesterday. This is day one for me of being porn free. Write it in stone.
I'm really struggling right now, and have been for the majority of my life. If I keep heading down the path I am currently on, I know I will once again find myself in a prison cell, thinking about how amazing my life had been, and wishing I had gotten help before it was too late. I have already gazed once over the smouldering ruins of a life I had worked hard for, only to lose everything in one defining moment. I've risen from the ashes once; I don't think I can do it again.
As a first step, I just need to put the full truth of my behavior out there. I have never told anyone half the stuff I'm about to write here, not even therapists. I really just need to type it out, all of it; I need to see it. I'm not looking for a diagnosis from anyone, but maybe just some thoughts from those who can relate to what I've been going through my entire life. There are crimes mentioned here, but I have already been convicted and served time for every one of them, and I am not currently engaging in any illegal activity.
I am currently in no danger of harming myself or anyone else, unless you count consistently violating the trust of all the people I love. This will eventually lead to me ruining the life I've worked so hard for, as well as destroying everyone I love. This issue, in various forms, has been going on for almost twenty years - all of my teen years and adult life. I don't know what it's like not to be handicapped by this. Enough is enough.
1. Sexuality in my childhood and early teen years.
I grew up financially privileged household with parents who both supported me, and I believe did they absolute best they could. In terms of their treatment of me, I don't ever recall them being anything but supportive in every possible way. As an only child of well-off parents, I was spoiled, and to my memory I really never had to earn the things I wanted. I think that my parents felt guilty for reasons mentioned below, and buying me stuff was seemingly an easy way to make me happy, especially since they both worked full time. A series of full-time babysitters helped take care of me early on. To my memory they were all great.
My parents were constantly yelling at each other. Never any physical abuse, but the yelling never stopped between them. At best guess it was all financial stuff due to my dad buying any car or motorhome or boat or house he liked. I counted once that they split up at least ten times before I was a teenager, and I lived in over twelve different houses (in the same area) before I turned 18. I had normal childhood friends, but I ended up spending a lot of time alone in my room with the door closed; it was a safe space. I was a very fearful and timid child, and never took chances to do anything that made me uncomfortable. This lack of confidence was strong into my late teens, and was still present until my mid-twenties. I was nervous and anxious all the time, and my parents did have me in therapy various times for depression. It might be worth noting that I regularly wet the bed until probably age 8 or 9. I don't know how much a normal person remembers of their childhood, but I think I remember a lot less than average. I have no reason to think I've repressed any abuse.
I was always extremely well behaved, and never once had to be disciplined in school. I was quite literally never "in trouble". Growing up, I remember adults around me would constantly remark I acted and talked like an adult. The way other kids acted out was very strange to me. I started reading books by myself at a very young age. I was nice, fairly quiet, and unassuming. I guess the best way to describe me would've been "stoic".
I was fascinated with sex a very early age, and my parents gave me "the talk" sometime in elementary school because teachers had noticed my sexual behavior. I have no reason to believe I was ever abused by anyone during this time. Around age 11 I found a page of Hustler magazine underneath a sink in a local grocery store. I had never seen anything like that before, and can still remember exactly what the page looked like - full penetration, cum on faces, anal. Like I said I don't remember much at all from when I was young, but I remember this; it felt like something snapped in my brain.
At best guess, around the age of 13 or 14 I started watching several hours of hardcore internet pornography every night - binge sessions that would keep me up until the early hours of the morning. At the time I didn't think this was abnormal.
I often forget just how terrified I was of girls at this state in my life, because I am now very confident with women. But from puberty and into my early twenties I was painfully inept with girls. If a pretty girl talked to me my face would turn BEET red and I'd start noticeably sweating. With the few girls I felt comfortable with, I was a friend zone extraordinaire. Just like most male teenagers, I was extremely horny, and lusted after every single cute girl, but I never did anything with any of them...not even close until late high school, not even a kiss. Everyone I knew was having sex at 13 and 14 years old, and I felt like a total loser in this regard. Asking a girl out was simply impossible, let alone knowing what to do if they wanted to have sex. This was a constant source of crushing stress, and porn was a temporarily band-aid for the pain. I would like to know if this might be part of the reason I find the jailbait and ageplay stuff so exciting.
I did have one girlfriend for almost two years from age 18 to 20, but I had serious issues getting it up when we had sex. I think my brain was so used to the constant stream of porn every night that real girls were now just boring, intimidating, and a lot of work. She cheated on me, but I stayed with her because she was hot and she told me she loved me. Then we both went to college near each other, but she broke up with me like a month into the first semester via text. I was crushed and didn't get into another relationship until I was 25. Before my mid-twenties my level of confidence with girls was simply abysmal.
To the best of my knowledge, my movement outside normal pornography started during my late teens/early 20s with hentai, then into paying camgirls, then to making posts on Craigslist in all the personal sections, but mostly m4m because the people were real and looking. At some point later on I started looking at loli hentai, which I've recently learned actually appears to be illegal in the USA. This seems like a defining moment because prior to this I had no urge to seek out anything "young". The girls looked young in hentai, and it seemed at some point to just slowly progress to drawings which were meant to actually resemble children. It was a very long, slow, and imperceptible shift from regular porn to extreme, but to me, looking back, the path is very distinct.
I consider myself straight, and not even bisexual. But I also talked to hundreds of men during this period of time by way of the Craigslist personals section (probably age 21 at this point). Most I just talked to, and never intended to meet. I ended up giving blowjobs to two of them in cars, and I fucking hated it each time. I compulsively created and responded to these posts on Craigslist. I recently deleted that email account - there were literally thousands of those Craigslist emails.
2. Worsening compulsive porn use in my early twenties.
At this point I started venturing more and more into "deviant" porn. After a huge binge session I would finish and just sit there numb, wondering why I was continuously doing this, even if it was just regular porn. Shame and guilt hit me like a truck after every session, but when I would wake up the next day I seemingly forgot about everything, and just would go on with my normal life. Nobody realized I had any porn issues whatsoever, and from the outside I appeared as a normal dude, and really I didn't think I had issues. Every night was the same, and every night I ended up going to bed hating myself, but would be just blissfully ignorant come the next day.
It was like some Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde shit where I would just transform into some slimy reptile at night, who had full control of me until he finished a smut binge session. And I'm always in the background, trying to get him to stop. I was "happy" at this point; I had tons of friends, and was liked by girls. Though at that time, a girl would have to literally throw herself on me to let me know she was interested. I was totally oblivious to any attraction toward me. A number of girl have told me in recent years that they had a huge crush on me, but I was just oblivious.
Also, I think I had this warped perception of sex because I had been exposed to thousands of hours of hardcore porn. I thought my dick was tiny and that I'd get laughed at. Also, no one had ever property taught me to care for my uncircumcised penis, and therefore I had phimosis at this point (unretractable foreskin). Sex with my one long term girlfriend was painful for me because of this, and it was just so much easier to jack off than deal with all this humiliation.
3. Things get bad.
Around 2009 Chatroulette and Omegle came out, which was a turning point. I found myself calling in sick to work to browse Omegle all day and night. Like eight or ten hours worth, which is sometimes what it took to find a girl willing to help you finish. There were girls who were definitely younger than 18, but I was so desperate for any sexual attention that I somehow convinced myself that talking to these girls was OK. "If they don't say they're under 18 then it's ok, right??" I didn't have a preference for anyone younger, but if some girl was willing to watch me, apparently I didn't really care what their age was. At the end of all these sessions I would think, "uh, what the fuck are you doing dude", followed by the normal torrent of shame.
The rational me is always there, literally begging myself to stop. I consistently participate in things I am ashamed of, all the while telling myself that what I'm doing is wrong and hoping that I can somehow stop myself. I feel like I'm down a dark well, screaming up at the guy who is in charge, but all he wants to is consume the dirtiest and kinkiest smut he can find; only after that will he let me climb out.
Which brings us to when I started looking at non-nude jailbait photos around the age of 23. I'm not sure when I discovered the "Newstar" and "Tinymodel" photo sets, but to that reptile dude in my head they were extremely exciting.
Historically, I have never had any intense sexual attraction to girls younger than me, and I have always sought out girls within my age range. But being honest, part of me loved looking at these pictures of young scantily clad girls. Vanilla porn was now just uninteresting, and didn't provide me the same excitement, and this jailbait stuff was literally like I had found a new drug. I loved it and I fucking hated it. I never walked around in public and saw young girls and thought "wow I want to have sex with her". It was all photo and video based. It was like the girls I was looking at online weren't even real people to me.
It was not long before I started seeking out actual underage pornography. I have intentionally searched for and masturbated to actual child pornography. I have never actually said that sentence to anyone, despite the fact that I was eventually caught and charged with possession of this shit. I only got into this stuff for a few weeks, but I fucking hate that I participated in it at all. A lot of it was just videos of young girls solo on webcams, but there were a few times I sought out, watched, and masturbated to girls probably as young as ten participating in sex acts with older men, presumably their fathers. I cannot un-see these images; I want them ripped from my brain, and for these kids to have normal lives. I want their abusers jailed for life.
After these binge sessions the shame was so great I considered suicide. I would go on binge sessions on the dark web, looking at whatever I could for hours, only to be met with the worst shame you could possibly imagine when I was done. I would lay in bed for days afterwards, not eating or drinking. I remember the thing that finally woke me the fuck up was coming across a video where a young girl was on camera and started to cry and looked at someone off screen and said "dad, can't we just play with legos?". WHAT THE FUCK. I have tears in my eyes just remembering this. How could anyone actually do something like this to a child? This is a real person.
Right then and there I broke down completely and sobbed my fucking eyes out. I felt completely out of control with my own actions, and though the thought of abusing a child disgusts me to my core, by watching this stuff I was supporting it. I don't want to fuck kids or young teens, so why am I watching this stuff? A few years prior to this I would have never considered looking at this stuff...what the fuck was happening to me? How do you even get help for this stuff? If I tell someone I'm looking at this shit they'll just lock me up. Instead of talking to anyone about what was going on in my own head, I moved 2,000 miles away from my home town to a town I had never visited before. I didn't even have a job lined up. Literally I hit rock bottom, panicked that the only solution was to fundamentally change my life, looked up the "happiest and healthiest town in America", and moved to #1. I'm now in my mid-twenties.
4. Moving away from home. Peace. Happiness. Misery. Police.
Initially, moving away from home did "the trick". I could actually call myself truly "happy" for the first time I think really ever, and I was healthy to boot. The possibilities in my life seemed absolutely without limit. I started working out and doing a bunch of stuff outside (rode my bike everywhere cause I didn't have a car). It was a mountainous town and I got involved in climbing, skiing, and everything else I could. I felt "clear" for the first time in decades, and my porn use pretty stopped almost completely. But I never dealt with the actual problem (and still haven't), and everything came back eventually.
I met a girl in the apartment complex one street over who I quickly fell head over heels for. We started hooking up, but it became apparent we wanted different things (I wanted commitment, she didn't), and I drove myself crazy over the next two years pining after her. I'd ask her to make things official, she'd run off, I'd date someone else, she'd get upset and sleep with me and tell me she loved me, then she'd start sleeping with someone else. We were in the same friend group, and she refused to let anyone know that we were intimate with each other. Eventually I just ended up feeling like a shameful secret. We were basically best friends who spent all our time together, and sometimes slept together. The story is long, and I think I'm at fault as much for not giving her space as she is for constantly vacillating between "loving" me and sleeping with other guys. Nothing was ever malicious on her end, but I think we were both a bit fucked up in our own ways, and eventually I found myself in a serious emotional decline. I felt hopeless and worthless; previously I had been filled with a newfound massive confidence, but now found myself just wanting to feel wanted. Before all the shit hit the fan I found myself sometimes calling her dozens of times in a night because I knew she was over some guys house. I drove around town looking for her car in front of dudes houses. I literally felt like I had lost my mind. During these times I had the same voice in the back of my head saying "uhhh, dude? this is fucked up and you need to stop".
Since moving to this city I had landed a great job with a company where I was well-liked and respected. I had tons of friends, and was like a goddamn social butterfly; I was always somewhere doing something with good people. I was so happy in almost every aspect of my life. I had been such a "scared" person my entire life, the fact that I was able to move here and succeed filled me with a confidence I had never experienced. If I could have just gotten my head out of my ass and focused on how amazing my life actually had become, I'd probably still be in this town.
But instead I dug myself into an emotional grave because the girl I wanted didn't want me in the same way, and I couldn't cope, or something. I had several other really fantastic women I was seeing on and off, ones who really liked me for me and would have been up for actual relationships, but they weren't her. In a very short period of time, towards the end of the two years of living in this new town, I got right back into the type of porn I ran away from. I started posting on Craigslist in multiple sections with both fake ads and real ads. I went from 0 to 1,000 with everything in the span of probably six months. I gave two more guys blowjobs, and once again fucking hated every second of both experience. I got right back into non-nude jailbait, and towards the end found myself on the dark web once again seeking illegal porn.
During this time I had posted several ads on Craigslist looking for actual women to sleep with, or really even just talk to; I just wanted to feel wanted. I never posted any ads actually looking for an underage girl, but one responded claiming to be 13, and against ever fiber of my being, I responded. We talked over the span of about five days, email and then through text. She complained about how all the girls at school made fun of her and she didn't have many friends and just wanted someone to talk to about "stuff". I seemed "cool" and "interesting" and she said she liked talking to me. We eventually talked about sexual things (this in itself is a felony), but fortunately no pictures were exchanged. Eventually the topic of meeting each other was brought up. I vacillated between thinking this was some old greasy dude in his basement, and thinking that I was actually talking to a young girl. This doubt gave me permission in my own head to talk to this girl. But also my own head was telling me "DUDE WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, STOP THIS." The thought of sexually talking to a 13 year old girl excited me, and I need to be honest about this. The idea of meeting up excited me as well. "She" tried to get me to meet her, but I did not make any attempt, and never actually set anything up. The rational voice in my head won out, and I stopped talking to her.
Right before I stopped talking to her I found myself driving down a long beautiful mountain road after work and Norah Jones's "Come Away With Me" came on the radio. It was so beautiful. All of a sudden it really hit me how fucking stupid I was in talking to this girl, but also how long I had been struggling with doing things I didn't want to do for so long, and how I just didn't know how to escape it. I pulled over to the side of the road and bawled my fucking eyes out. "Is this how you're going to find happiness, dude?" I just wanted to find someone to love and to love me back, to be in a healthy relationship for the first time, to feel "clean" and wholesome and proud of my actions and decisions. I didn't want any of this stupid shit I was now suddenly back into.
A week or so after I stopped communicating with this girl, five detectives woke me up at 6am banging on the door of my apartment. I was not under arrest, but they took all of my electronics and informed me that I had actually been talking to them, not to a 13 year old girl. I thought the life I knew was over (I was right), so that night I held a kitchen knife up to my arm. I thought of my parents and just couldn't go through with it. I've never seriously thought about anything like this since that moment.
I didn't hear from the police for about four months. I told my parents what had happened the day after the cops showed up, and how I had been struggling with pornography addiction my entire life, and it felt good to be "honest" (really I didn't tell them half the shit I had issues with, but even halfway felt great). I got a lawyer and just sat around for a few months waiting to be arrested, sitting with the severe anxiety of not knowing if or when my life is going to be totally destroyed by committing a sex offense.
5. Arrest. Conviction. A promise to myself.
They arrested me outside my home in broad daylight, two plainclothes officers driving an old shitty Honda Civic. If they had just told me to come to the station I would have turned myself in, but they got all theatrical with it, and called me and made up some story about how they were from my old apartment complex and wanted to drop off my security deposit at my house. To this day whenever I hear a car door shut outside my house, or see an unknown car park nearby, or even dudes in public who look like undercover cops, I immediately get a severe rush of anxiety in the fear that I'm about to be arrested again. I'll go from totally relaxed to severe paranoid paralyzing anxiety in a microsecond, heart beating out of my damn chest.
My arrest should have been a small blip in the news, but because of some other factors it would take too long to go into, I ended up on the front page of every paper and TV station in the state. Sitting in jail, I didn't know this until the next day. I remember sitting in the bond hearing court room, just staring at the line of media photographers in the audience with all their telephoto lenses, capturing my face to put it in the papers underneath words like "predator", "pedophile", and "sex offender"....and they did. My lawyer came in and just said some shit like "yeah, sorry dude, you are everywhere". It's a very unique feeling knowing that from this point forward, absolutely everything in your life will be different. Every relationship you have will be affected. Nothing will ever be the same.
I vowed right then and there to never give up no matter how tough the road ahead gets. I'm going to live a life I can be proud of; this will be my success story. Maybe I'll write a book about it, but it would be pointless without an ending I could be proud of and honest about. I will be the guy who, against all odds, moves beyond a criminal sex offense, and has people who love and trust him, and who can eventually look back and say "look at what I achieved". I've made great strides toward this life, and have worked my ass off to get where I am now, but the the mental issues which led to my eventual imprisonment are still inside my head, and I finally need to admit that I need serious help.
6. Finding happiness while everything around me is on fire.
My parents bonded me out the next day. Though my boss tried his best to keep me, the widespread news of my arrest and the fact that we were one of the most respected (and well known) general contractors in the area meant I lost my job. I was friends with over a dozen guys I worked with, always drinking some beers behind the workshop after a day of hard work. I was there fore over a year, building relationships, and I had started going out to bars and going over the bosses houses for family dinners. Save for the three main guys, I never saw any of them again. Lots of friends stuck by me, but the town was ruined.
I fought the case for almost a year. What started out as my lawyer being confident that I would just get a few years probation turned into me pleading guilty to internet solicitation of a minor and possession of child pornography. I had I think like seven nude images of girls who were under 18 on my computer, and one video. My lawyer dropped the ball several times when communicating / meeting deadlines with the district attorney, and the situation became way worse than it should have been. Under my lawyers advisement I signed a plea deal which meant there was no question I would get a prison sentence between 2 and 8 years. I did commit crimes and it is my opinion that I did deserve punishment. I mean, from the outside, I can see how I looked like a run-of-the-mill child predator. However, spending a few years in prison is probably the least helpful thing for someone in my situation, in my opinion.
While I was home fighting my case I was filled with a sort of "I have nothing to lose" confidence, and started taking any girl who would accept out on dates. I thought my friends sister was cute, so I asked her out. It took a good number of tries, but she eventually agreed to let me take her to dinner. We had a really great time. After a couple dates I was honest about the legal situation I was in, as well as my mental struggles. She was a bit shocked of course, but she had known me for a long time. She stuck around, and we had the most beautiful summer together before I had to fly 2,000 miles away to serve an unknown amount of prison time. She, as well as my parents, sisters, and friends flew out with me to the sentencing hearing. My girlfriend and I told each other "I love you" for the first time the night before the hearing.
We're still together, and she's been by my side through everything the past five years. I've never met someone who was so easy to be around. How I could ever get so lucky, I will never know.
7. Prison. Gangs. Solitary confinement. Making the most of it.
I was sentenced to four years in a medium security state penitentiary. The gangs pretty much run the prisons in this state, and you'll get immediately extorted by the gang which coincides with your skin color if they find out you're a sex offender. I stayed under the radar for a few weeks, but some gangs save newspaper clippings with sex offenders photos, and I got found out. They threatened to kill me, so I told the guards I was in danger; they agreed. I spent a month and a half in solitary confinement for my own protection. This was "the hole", a cell with no window to the outside where they never turn the lights off). I was eventually transferred to a different facility which was much safer, though one sex offender was murdered during my stay there. Prison could be a book in itself, but most of it was just groundhog day. It would be best described as long periods of mind-numbing boredom interspersed with occasional moments of sheer fucking terror. I was extremely fortunate to talk to my girlfriend every single day on the phone, as well as very regularly my parents, relatives, and friends. I had a ridiculous number of visitors, despite being a 2,000 mile flight and hours long drive through the desert away from everyone I cared about.
I had started taking mindfulness meditation classes after the initial search warrant was served. This habit continued into prison, and most of my month and a half in the hole was spent meditating. Solitary confinement can be maddening; you could occasionally hear guys screaming or crying in other ~60 cells in the solitary cell block. But honestly I've never been more at peace than how I was during those 45 days. I remember my girlfriend told me over the phone that she had heard that my ex girlfriend (long term one from when I was ~19) was going around telling people the news that I was a child molester. At first I felt panicked, because this firestorm of people I went to high school with "finding out" about me was totally out of my control. But then I came to the realization that that's pretty much how life always is, even if you're not a convicted sex offender sitting in the hole because the Aryan Empire wants to kill you. You could just be a dude minding his business, and then bam, you get run over by a bus. I can't control what people think of me, or the things they say, and that's ok. But I should be able to control which thoughts I turn into actions, and meditation helped me greatly in this.
At this new facility I eventually petitioned the warden to allow me to start a weekly meditation group. He allowed it, and they gave me a quiet classroom behind the library to use for two hours every Wednesday night. It started out with pretty much just me alone, maybe one other person occasionally. Within a few months I had about a dozen regular members. Everyone from sex offenders, to men who had murdered their wives and didn't quite know why, to ex gang members. Twice we had meditation instructors come from the outside to teach for a day. We meditated and discussed how to find peace in a place as abrasive as prison. I taught these men that their thoughts do not need to dictate their actions, and that they have control over their own mind, not the other way around. Focus on the breath, observe your own thoughts coming in and observe them going out. At this point my mind felt healthier than ever had before; I could "see" the thoughts which entered my head and choose to either pursue them or just send them on their way. Through daily practice (I meditated every morning and night) I was becoming a master of my own mind, but now I seem to have lost it all. I can't even bring myself to sit on my mediation cushion; I feel like someone is physically preventing me from meditating. I based almost my entire practice around a fantastic book called "Turning the Mind into an Ally" by Sakyong Mipham. Right after I got out of prison I heard that there were recent multiple credible sexual assault allegations against him. This destroyed me a little bit. Is anyone actually righteous?
I called the prison a few months ago. The meditation group has more members than ever.
8. I shall be released (but with an ankle bracelet).
I was paroled at my first parole hearing. Overall I spent about twenty months in prison, out of a possible 48. This didn't just happen; I have never worked so hard at anything. I participated in every prison program I could. I worked 40+ hours a week as a maintenance technician at the facility, as this is my area of expertise. I was well known and liked by dozens of guards, probably partly because I never caused a single issue. I was in three bands, and after I played a live show for the entire ~1,000 inmate population the gangs left me alone because they liked hearing me play guitar (pretty much the only thing I've stuck with for the last 15 years). I volunteered to give a ten minute graduation speech to a couple hundred inmates in a certain program. At this time, public speaking was at the top of my list of fears. I took every single opportunity presented to me an capitalized on it. Not just because I wanted to be released, but because I felt compelled to. No more being scared. No more fucking around. I am ready to lead a life I can be proud of, and it starts now, not when I'm released from behind bars.
Thankfully I was allowed to parole to my home state. I moved in with my girlfriend (and her mom), and we started looking for places to rent together, finding one in about a month. My parole office was amazing, and when I was eventually released from parole, after about a year and a half, we shared a good number of beers together. I can't tell you quite how good it feels to cut a heavy cigarette-pack sized ankle bracelet off after wearing it for 18 months straight. This was almost a year and a half ago now.
It was finally done. I was no longer a number in the Department of Corrections. I was free, free to build a beautiful life with my beautiful girlfriend. And I never watched porn again. Fairy tale ending.
9. P.S. - Nothing has really changed.
I started looking at porn probably two days after I got home. I tried REALLY fucking hard not to, but it just happened like I was on autopilot. It started with just me giving myself the excuse I could jerk off to some scantily clad anime girls, then moved to ecchi ("I mean, whatever, it's just nipples dude"), and then to hentai. In my head I'm screaming at myself, "DUDE STOP, GO HAVE SEX WITH YOUR ACTUAL HORNY GIRLFRIEND", while I'm loading up Pornhub in the bathroom. I was not allowed to look at porn while on parole, but they did not actually monitor anything or ever actually check my devices. I was allowed a smart phone and essentially unrestricted internet access. I passed all my drug tests, passed my polygraphs, and presented no actual problems to the parole office, so I pretty much totally fell off their radar. I had to take state-sponsored sex offender therapy, but if I had admitted to looking at porn they would've just sent me back to prison because it was a parole violation. So much for getting help with your biggest problem.
I tried to stop, dozens of times. At most I could go about two weeks without looking at porn, which is pretty much a world record for me. But whenever I abstain for a long period, something will inevitably stress me out, and I'll dive back into the sexual compulsion. Soon, I got right back on Omegle, and found a new thing to search for: phone sex. In the past eighteen months I've probably have phone sex with at least three dozen women. In my mind, and I'm sure in the mind of my girlfriend, this is cheating, plain and simple. Again, what the fuck dude.
But I'm not thinking of this when we're together. I'm just being me, and enjoying her. There's no present thought in my mind going "hey I feel really guilty about having phone sex with girls right before you get home from work". I love her, and I love spending time with her, and none of the shameful shit I am involved in even enters my mind when we are together. Though occasionally during sex I'll get hit with a wave of shame and I'll lose my erection and can't get it back up. "I'm just really tired", I say. Ugh.
Probably 6 months ago I started looking non-nude jailbait photography again. It always happens the same - I tell myself, "ok you're horny so just jerk off for ten minutes to some vanilla stuff so you can think clearly and after that you're gonna get a bunch of shit done". Two hours later I've still got my hand on my dick, I'm all flushed and sweaty, and I'm looking at jailbait pictures while I'm screaming at myself inside my own head...
"Stop. Please stop. Dude you know you don't want to be doing this. Is this going to be the last time? If you need to finish just do it but make this the last time. You can still stop. Go take a cold shower and just stop. Please. You know this isn't what you want. Please stop".
I just burst into fucking tears typing that because I've gone through that loop in my own head literally tens of thousands of times. I just cannot stop myself. There is nothing I want more in this world than to stop all of this.
It just keeps happening, no matter how many strategies I use to stop, I always find an excuse.
"Just do it this once but then never again."
"Ok fine, jerk off to some legal jailbait stuff, but make it quick, no endless scrolling."
"Well you're a freak anyways, everyone thinks you're a pedo, so fuck it, prove em right. You know you can't stop so just embrace it and enjoy it. Let's find the kinkiest shit possible."
And when I DO abstain for a long period, when I eventually relapse it's just 1000x worse. I'll end up doing like an eight hour binge and missing an entire day of work.
And it's getting worse. I'll talk to girls and guys over the phone via Omegle, and I've started asking guys to roleplay a dad/daughter or brothelittle sister fantasy with me. I ask if they want to roleplay that we're dads and have "hot" stories to tell about our young daughters. I get turned on thinking about talking about something this kinky, but I end up hanging up every time within like a minute. Like literally I've never even gotten close to "finishing" on one of these calls. Probably done this like 15 times in the past 6 months. The other guy starts going into his fantasy story and it hits me how fucked up this is and I hang up. I don't want to fuck kids...this is not a thing that is on my mind, ever. I do not go to the beach and think "hell yeah look at all this ripe young ass". Almost all of my friends have young children and I've never once thought of doing anything with them. In fact I pretty much avoid children, because I now project what I think other people think of me onto myself.
When I ask these guys on Omegle to roleplay occaisonally one will ask if I'm "active", aka actually molesting a child, and it makes me want to throw up thinking someone would want to hear about actual abuse. When I read a news story about someone actually raping a kid my face curls up in disgust, which I feel like is pretty much the "normal" reaction. Weigh that against the fact that a couple times in prison I got horny and started writing a few sex stories involving young teens. I never finished any of these stories, and shredded and threw them out halfway through writing all of them. Again, what the fuck.
I'm just waiting for the FBI to show up at my house. Isn't asking guys on Omegle, "would you be into a fantasy where we roleplay as two dads telling hot stories about our daughters?" a huge red flag? But I always tell them, "this is 100% fantasy, and I do not want to hear about anything real. I do not want to receive pictures or participate in anything actually illegal." If they say they have real stories I leave the chat / hang up immediately. Even though I'm not doing anything illegal, whenever I hear a car door shut from a neighbor, my heart races and I have to get up from my desk to check if it's the cops.
I also sometimes ask the phone sex girls on Omegle to ageplay as a young teens for me, and pretty much all of them have been happy to. Like 15, 14, 13 years old, whatever they're comfortable with. Why do I want this? Why is there such a disconnect between what I find disgusting in real life and what I "want" to fantasize about? If I could pay someone my entire life savings to remove the part of my brain that harbors this desire to fantasize about the idea of sex with young girls, I wouldn't hesitate for a second. I do not and have not talked with anyone on Omegle or on the phone who says that they are actually under 18; at least prison taught me the lesson to never talk to an actual young person ever again. Maybe in some peoples opinions the ageplay thing is acceptable and nothing to be ashamed about, but I do not want it as a kink of mine. It brings me serious, crushing shame for days after I participate in it.
Shame really seems to be a constant theme of my sexuality throughout the years. Even after normal sex I feel a bit of shame. I've always had serious shame amount my body, especially my genitals, but even with just taking off my shirt. My parents were always open to talk about sex, and to my memory never did anything to instill shame in me when it came to sex. But stepping back it almost looks like the things that I find the most shameful are the things I'm most likely to seek out.
Post too long, last two chapters have been posted in a comment.
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2020.07.24 16:45 wolf24Jul Camera inside anal

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2020.07.22 08:25 Baby22JulIntca Anal camera inside

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