Nude mum photos

Hey thank you so much for watching my video. You can subscribe to my YouTube channel for free . If you want to come to ... Leaving Home emphasizes the life-saving benefits of separating from destructive parents and offers effective tips on how to deal with family problems by putting distance between yourself and toxic relatives.. 6. Don’t expect your family member to change. This is the most important tip on how to deal with family problems: you can’t change your relatives. The beneficiaries of a will have certain rights, including the right to know what is going on with their inheritance. However, they are not entitled to know everything. Read on to better understand the limits of beneficiary rights. The Rights of Beneficiaries to Wills | Skip to main content. Time to Let Go. For me, the need to clean out my late husband’s closet struck relatively early after his death in 2009. ... You do what you have to do. There is no right; there is no wrong. ... The most important things you can do Let the worker and your attorney know right away about any relatives or other people who can take your kids if they can’t stay with you. That way you may be able to keep your kids in the family. Get your visits set up and make all your visits. It’s important to your kids and to the judge. Do relatives living rent free in my home have any renters rights? I own my home and have been allowing a niece and her family to live rent free with me. I am considering moving my personal belongings out and into a retirement community and eventually selling my home. "Don't visit older relatives unless it's absolutely necessary — as in, they need food, they need help at home, they need supplies or they need their medications," says Morrison. He says every older... Of course, since going NC is a radical step, we usually don't do it perfectly at first. We may feel guilty, or think of the toxic person with anger. But our intention is to pull away from the dysfunctional system that we were trapped in, the relationship with the toxic person or the toxic Family of Origin. Here’s what one woman confided: “This time it’s been a year, and I still wonder whether I’ve done the right thing even though I know it’s the right thing. I get these crazy, unrealistic ... If your grandchildren or other relatives are in foster care, you have the right to petition for custody in Family Court. If I have custody, can I receive money from ACS? No.

2020.09.13 15:53 Quinnsi3 Did I do the right thing by going NC with my relatives?

I'm using a throwaway account because I don't want any of my family to identify me here. This is a long one so bear with me. There have been so many incidents that happened over the past years, I honestly don't know where to start, but just recently 2 months ago I decided to cut ties with my dad's sister and her husband for good. My decision of cutting ties affected me emotionally and made me feel raw. I'm hoping that by sharing my story here, it can help me get a grip and start recovering emotionally.
Before I start my story, here's a TLDR for people who don't want to read the whole thing: After enduring for years, I finally went NC with my snobbish self righteous aunt (and in extension, potentially the rest of my extended family) because she (and some others in the family) have treated my parents like 2nd class citizens for years. I don't know if I did the right thing by going NC; now I'm starting to wonder if I should have kept status quo to avoid drama.
To give you some context of how my dad's side of the family are: All of my dad's siblings are filthy rich. They live in bungalows, carry designer bags, drive fancy cars, and they are all either running successful businesses or working in highly paid corporate jobs. My dad is upper-middle class, but he is financially the "poorest" among all his siblings. Because of this, my dad has always had an inferiority complex towards his siblings and it doesn't help that his siblings also look down on my dad (they don't do it outright but you can tell by their subtle actions and words). Everyone from my dad's side of the family also attend the same church (including myself, as I am a Christian as well). Many of my aunts and uncles also hold leadership positions in church, and they are highly respected at church. However, outside of church, they are rich snobs whose social circles consist of other rich snobs.
So here are the various incidents that have happened over the past years that led to my decision 2 months ago to remove them from my life.
First off, the cast:

Incident 1 - My wedding
I got married 3 years ago, and it was a outdoor wedding by the beach. My wedding was considered pretty unconventional, because the country where I live in, people of Chinese ethnicity hold traditional Chinese-style wedding banquets in an air-conditioned ballroom where guests show up in formal attire, are seated at round tables in groups of 10, and are served 8 course meals. For my wedding, I did it a buffet style where guests were encouraged to walk/mingle around, grab their own food at the buffet line, and I also encouraged everyone to show up in their most casual attire (beach-wear!). Obviously it was outdoors so there was no air-conditioning either (but there were fans put up so it still felt cool). Everyone was having lots of fun. 2 hours into my wedding party, it was time for some games. Guess what? I then found out that the entire side of my dad's family had left. Without informing me (although my aunt claimed she had informed my parents, which I don't think is an excuse because my parents are not the ones getting married???). Well, I wasn't really affected by it at that time because I was having too much fun at my own wedding, but right now thinking back, if I had done the same to any of theitheir kids' weddings, I would have been called out for being rude and disrespectful. Yet they found it perfectly fine to do it to mine. I have often wondered what was the reason they left my wedding prematurely, as they have never done so at other weddings, and the only reason I could think of was that they were rich snobs who couldn't stand the idea of having to serve themselves food in an outdoor environment without air-conditioning.
Incident 2 - My brother's wedding
My brother got married 2 years ago. Several months before the wedding, during one of the family gatherings, all my relatives were verbally invited to the wedding, but they did not receive invitation cards because the cards wasn't printed yet. My extended relatives don't live in the same city as my parents, so when the cards were finally printed, my mum texted to the family chat group (there are like 50+ of us in the chat group, including all uncles, aunts, and cousins from my dad's side) saying "whoever requires an invitation card, please let me know so I can arrange for you to receive it". Some of my relatives in the chat group took offense because they found it disrespectful that the cards were not distributed to them and instead they had to ASK for it, IF they wanted it. To them, that meant they were not properly invited to the wedding. They became very rude towards my parents, telling them off, putting them down, scolding my parents harshly in the chat group (especially aunt M, uncle M, and cousin M). As Christians (and furthermore, LEADERS of the church), if you think that someone has made a social/cultural faux pas, shouldn't you give advice gently instead of lashing out? My parents deemed that giving physical invitation cards was optional because they had already verbally invited them. But my extended family saw receiving physical invitation cards as mandatory because they deemed it as an official invitation. It's not like my parents did it deliberately to disrespect them - it was just a misunderstanding. From this incident, it was further reinforced how much my dad's siblings looked down upon my parents that they felt justified in using harsh words on my parents for doing things a little differently. My mum didn't even try to defend herself, she just apologised to keep the peace.
Incident 3 - my photoshoot
This is the most recent incident that happened 2 months ago that triggered me to cut them from my life. I am not a professional model, but I enjoy having my pictures taken. After eating clean/healthy and working out for months, I finally achieved my desired body and I was really happy and proud that my hard work paid off. I then had a photoshoot with a friend who's a professional photographer. We did some boudoir, some pics of me in a virgin killer sweater, and an implied nude where I covered my bits with my cats. I honestly loved the end result - the pics came out so artistic and tasteful; not skanky or slutty at all. I excitedly uploaded the pics on social media. All my friends loved it and they all said I looked beautiful. Cue Aunt M, who also saw the pics (okay this is partially my fault for not restricting viewing permission - I knew she'd probably disapprove but I honestly didn't expect her to react to it the way she did). She sent me a wall of body-shaming text saying how our bodies are temple of God and we shouldn't defile it by posting half-naked obscene photos online, and that my actions were ungodly and shameful. Honestly, I knew that by putting my body online, there would bound to be body shamers who just want to spread hate and negativity, but I just didn't expect it to come from family.
Aside from these 3 incidents, there were many other incidents that have happened over the past 5-10 years that I won't mention here because my post will never end.
So this is where I decided to go NC and inevitably started some drama... After Incident 3, I basically exploded and texted my mum and my bro about my years of bottled up feelings of unhappiness towards my dad's siblings, and especially towards Aunt M and Uncle M. I shared with them my honest feelings: That despite them acting all "holy" and "righteous" at church, they are in fact two-faced hypocritical Pharisees who are only chasing after glory and approval from men, instead of really wanting to build a genuine relationship with God. My brother agreed with me fully, and he says he despises them too for the same exact reasons. He even admitted to me that sometimes, he gets so angry at them that he wants to spit in their faces. But he told me he has made the decision to continue to hold his tongue and be courteous towards them at family gatherings, because he doesn't want to create drama. My mum told me that she is aware of how my dad's siblings have been treating my parents as 2nd class citizens over the years, and how my parents are constantly looked down on by them. Despite that, she has chosen to forgive them, as that is what a Christian should do.
Well, I was having none of THAT. I decided that I will not attend any family gathering on my dad's side ever again. I quit the chat group (NOBODY in the family has ever left the chat group - I was the first one to do so). I have been contemplating leaving the chat group for several years but I have always decided against it because I thought "keeping the peace" was more important. Also, I have been brought up with the very traditional Asian mindset that family is everything. Even more so when we all go to the same church. After years of being brainwashed, I decided to snap out of it and remove myself from this toxic group of people who call themselves "family".
Aunt M texted me after she noticed that I left the chat group. She asked me why I left. I texted her a verbal diarrhoea of every single transgression she (and some others in the family) had made toward my parents over the years, also pointing out that I thought she was a snob and a hypocrite who put more importance in how people saw her as an authority and leader in church, instead of wanting to build a genuine relationship with God. In an Asian family, talking back to your elders is unheard of, and I'm pretty sure this was the first time in her sorry life that someone of a younger generation talked to her so candidly. Instead of reflecting on her actions, she immediately went into defensive mode and tried to redeem herself by spelling out all the "good deeds" and "sacrificies" she had made for "the family". Her defense comeback just further reinforced my point - she acted like a good person and a good Christian, but she was also extremely self-righteous and hypocritical, only doing good deeds so that people would think she was a good person. It seemed to me that she could only see the faults in others, but not in herself. At the end of her self-righteous wall of text, she ended it with "My conscience is clear", which made me roll my eyes so far into my head. I couldn't take any more of her bullshit so I told her to have a good life and then blocked her.
Shortly after I left the chat group, I posted a cryptic post on Facebook saying "After enduring for years, I finally found the courage to leave toxic people behind me. Never felt better." Another aunt of mine (let's call her Aunt W - she is one of my dad's brother's wife) shared my post on her wall. Was she doing it with the intention of shaming me further as the black sheep (since we have a lot of mutual friends from church, which would also see the post and come to their own conclusions), or was she sharing to show me support? I texted her to ask why she shared my post, but she left my message as read and never responded. Thoughts?
Although the drama was mainly with Aunt M, I don't know if the rest of the 50+ people in the family chat group would start talking and taking sides (if they did, they'd probably side Aunt M anyway). I know not everyone in the family is like Aunt M; there are some good people there too. I feel bad that by leaving the chat group and posting that cryptic message on Facebook, I might also jeopardise my relationship with the rest. Because of this, there is a small part of me that still wonders if I made the right decision. Maybe it would have been better if I had just held my tongue, stayed in the chat group, and continue to attend family gatherings? I am also worried about the awkwardness when I bump into Aunt/Uncle/Cousin M at church, although I currently live in another country so it's not likely that I will see them. But the church community is very small so I might still bump into them when I fly home to visit my parents or if they happen to come visit the church in my country.
Honestly idk what to think. Was I too rash in deciding to cut them out from my life? Am I the JustNo black sheep of the family? Thinking back, it's not like Aunt M and the rest were constantly giving me grief - it was tolerable and I could still mostly get on with my life, except for the occasional instances where I'm forced to interact with them during family events.
submitted by Quinnsi3 to JUSTNOFAMILY [link] [comments]

2020.09.11 22:48 ThrowRAHLLO Nude mum photos

I'd like to apologise first for such a long post, but I just needed to give the background so anyone who is willing to read it all can give well-informed advice. There is a TL;DR at the end but I would appreciate it all being read.

So I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years now, and things have been a mixed bag since we've been together.
When we first got together, he was struggling with depression and a drug addiction but we both really got along well and went out together and have spent most of our time together ever since. Things only improved over the next 5-6 months, with stress of exams added onto things and eventually he relapsed a handful of times which caused more issues, although ultimately we did have some of our best times over the next 5 or so months even with that.
However, during that time I found myself bored one day and decided to post a picture of myself naked on Reddit (no face, but a nude nonetheless). I got some positive responses and felt a rush from it, then from then on I had some times here or there that I'd post stuff. I kept getting comments of people asking if I had a Snapchat or Kik and for a while I said "no, I don't" until one day I thought "I'll just try Kik out", and then that escalated things as it then meant I added a lot of people on kick (and also got added myself) and spent hours on some days sexting random people, with a lot not even necessarily being my type but I still did it just because I got positive responses and didn't want to cause issues for someone else if they were insecure.
I kept this up every here or there for a while, then it escalated to being a few days at a time every week or so and it took out a lot of my free time to myself. In the midst of this, I was arguing here or there but it was rarely serious stuff, although my boyfriend was struggling with depression again and lied about some times he had and hadn't relapsed to push me away.
I should also mention that the main reason I thought to post myself on Reddit was because he had told me about how many people use Reddit for porn or to post themselves on there, and sometimes I'd get him sending me photos of myself (as he often sends me posts of stuff he likes) and then he'd say "wow this person looks so like you", and this was what led to him finding out (as opposed to me coming clean). He found another of these posts, sent it to me saying "wow this looks like you" (or something along those lines) again, and I brushed it off and then he kept looking at their lost history, saw a lot of stuff and eventually found a post I made before all of the nudes that was originally talking about the struggles I had with our relationship, and he also found another post of me gushing about how much I enjoyed our first date detailing a lot of stuff that happened.
He obviously recognised this and confronted me about it, and I kept denying everything then trickled out little bits of truth here or there as I was realising I really shouldn't have done any of this. I honestly somehow convinced myself it wasn't cheating in spite of the fact I would be hiding it and lying to him when he says "this looks like you" and I'd deny it. He was a mess, feeling insecure about whether I find him attractive, whether I even love him, what he'd done and so on. He was broken and that was only my own fault and stupidity. He was going to an interview for university the next week and was sexting me a lot as he has since mentioned that was him trying to overcompensate, and also was understandably very stressed. He did decently but also missed his place, which I do feel guilty about and I know he still holds against me as he was and still is so desperate to get in to that uni and when he feels down sometimes he brings it up even now.
I begged him to give me another chance and to let us try again as I honestly couldn't believe I'd cheated as that was the last thing I thought I'd ever do. I also told him if he truly thought we could never work to let us end, but if he had any hope we could work that he should give us another go. He eventually agreed to try, and became more and more angry, jealous, insecure and abusive over the next few months. He also was telling me to tell someone about what I'd done, and I was so ashamed that I kept putting it off. As time went on I had begun to realise I really should, and was planning to over the next week or two, and then one day I got a message from him distraught saying how horrible my best friend is.
He'd told me he had said to her about what I did as I had kept putting it off and he just wanted someone else to know and me not to hide what I'd done. I was initially hurt too and angry because he'd gone behind my back when after so long of just putting it off I was finally actually planning to tell her and then he'd told her without me being able to. He then explained that when he'd told her about everything that she said she didn't see it as cheating and that it was my body and I could do what I wanted, then they kept arguing and she insulted him as he kept trying to say about what I'd done because she got defensive on my behalf. I felt hurt he'd gone behind my back, upset he felt so bad (and even felt suicidal) after what she'd said but from what I remember even at the time I felt it was an adverse reaction to what she'd said, but I knew he'd struggled with depression and felt insecure about himself and our relationship at that time so I can understand the hurt more.
He told me to stop speaking to her, and I said I won't, but I'll cut down on speaking to her around him as he took issue with how much I messaged other people when around him (I'd say it's not even much different to average but he's always dedicating as much of his attention to me as possible when we're together instead of chatting to other people, but he also struggles to get himself to message other people and make friends because of the issues he had with friends before we even got together.
As time went on, things were still rocky (with him eventually calming down a bit more and being less abusive, and me getting defensive and also abusive myself). In the midst of this he was desperately trying to get me to go on a multiple week holiday I kept telling him I couldn't afford and didn't want to go on and also had stress of worrying about my cat as she was 11 years old that year and looked visibly more I'll and I was worried about her. We eventually went on the holiday (it was on and off for a while and I also felt stressed because my mum didn't like travelling back and forth a lot and noe suddenly I'd told her a couple of weeks before I would be on holiday abroad even during my 18th birthday).
Whilst on this holiday, I hated a lot of the first week (which was a lot of heavy walking and travelling with all of our belongings on our backs for miles and miles up and down hill in the middle of a heat wave), and even at the end we got bed bugs which made our already bad mosquito-bitten arms even worse and we spent the next week (which included my birthday) being extra cautious to get rid of them before we came home in a beach city where we relaxed much more but also spent a lot of time swimming (where I'm not a comfortable swimmer and kept trying to avoid going too deep).
Sadly, during this week my cat died and my mum didn't tell me until I got home as she wanted to make sure I enjoyed the holiday, but once we arrived and I was told she'd passed away I was broken. He knew how much she meant to me and how worried I was about her and he supported me the entire car journey back and (despite planning on going home) stayed with me to bury her and keep me company over night. He was really good to me then and we both felt so close then, even despite the trauma and hurt I was feeling. Mostly after that I was broken by losing her and things were mostly good batting a few arguments here or there, until one day (a couple of weeks later or so) he'd said he needed me to cut out my best friend. He says it was because of how much it hurt him seeing me not even tell her the full extent of how much it hurt him and her apologising to him and seeing me talk to her even when I tried to avoid doing so in front of him.
I told him I would do it but not right now because I had just lost one huge part of my world and my friend was someone I've known longer than most other people I talk to today, but I also didn't want to lose him and wanted to try to make things work. He refused and said I had to then, and this was also on the day I was due to meet up with her (which isn't a common thing as we don't live too close), and in the end I saw her and gave each other birthday gifts and that was the last time I saw her in person, and even that caused issues despite it being me saying goodbye to my best friend (who I didn't know what to say to explain the situation), and then it ended up being I kept talking to her every month or so trying to be subtle so I don't lose her completely and also because I didn't want him to find out and then hate me and leave me or get abusive again.
I kept telling her I was just bad at replying, which was true tbf as I had become worse at replying, but I still even now haven't told her why I really stopped speaking as much. As we led up to going to university, my boyfriend also began becoming more controlling again, and we basically spent every weekend together (keep in mind we didn't go to the same university so traveled a lot just to see each other to the point I had no money before the first term ended), and he also began seeing himself as a sort of "parental figure" and began talking down to me and telling me all of our issues were because of me. We both knew I have anger issues that began since I got more defensive, but every time I brought up the fact he's deliberately do stuff to piss me off that he knew would do that, or that he'd refuse to change stuff that he often does whilst telling me to change the equivalent stuff I do, or the fact that he got abusive again and I got abusive and physically on edge all the time to the point of also becoming abusive (and even fracturing a bone in his thumb) as he'd grab me to calm me down and I feel terrified and lash out despite not being hit at all.
I began trying to get help at a therapist at uni, and saw the therapist once and booked another appointment a couple of weeks later and was enrolled on a mindfulness course. The mindfulness course helped me relax, and the therapist worked much more to my style so I was hopeful. The therapist was ill on the next appointment and I tried following up and they ultimately never got back to me until a couple of months later when I tried again and they'd told me to start again from scratch. I kept putting off trying again and things were still bad, and my boyfriend took issue with me even talking to other people whilst I replied to his messages, or spending time with my flatmates or friends for a long time when he knew I felt I was struggling to make friends at uni as is.
He has also struggled to make friends, and I've put this down to him refusing to open up after being so hurt by his past friends and then again by me, the one person he's properly opened up to since. He's got a few people he's close-ish to, but I have always worried about him not finding friends and isolating himself, which is still what he's done to an extent throughout uni. Once lockdown was coming up this year, we both stayed together for a week at my accommodation as he arrived just before the guidelines to avoid other people for days at a time arose. We argued a lot and I think this may even have been when I fractured his thumb (near the joint as I hit him hard right on the joint). Things calmed down a bit more, but his OCD and already growing germaphobia from before the pandemic even began got even worse and was unbearable at times for me.
Once we went home and into lockdown, his hopes for a holiday this summer were off (which I was relieved in as he'd insisted I spend money on this holiday for us both I didn't really want instead of a new laptop I had been trying to save up for since before our relationship, one I needed for my course itself too as my current one was literally falling apart and so sluggish). I relished in the freedom away and enjoyed talking to him when things were good and also began talking to my best friend regularly again as I had given up on hiding it as he hadn't checked and had said himself several times he'd "wanted to tell me to talk to her but wanted to wait until I was better for a few weeks before I could", something I could never do whilst he convinced himself he was never in the wrong.
We kept arguing sometimes and I felt more and more distance from us as a couple, and often arguments would end with me asking for a break (even before lockdown, too), and he'd always refuse that as an option and said it was essentially all or nothing (no break, either staying and trying or breaking up and never speaking again). He knew I needed him in my life and kept this up and even now insists he just couldn't trust me to have a break as he worried I'd go away, be promiscuous then come back and try to make things work, which is something I've feared him doing since before I cheated before and even moreso recently as he for the last year has kept saying he wanted to take a break before uni ends to have a year to just fuck everyone he wants and then get back together eventually (something I was terrified of but also hoping for as I wanted a break to give myself a chance to think).
This kept on happening, then he eventually started suggesting meeting up and avoiding contact which we did, then as restrictions eased we met up and I stayed at his for a few days and we'd have sex and argue as we try to enjoy other stuff. Then things swiftly got to the point of my mum once again dropping me off every few days to his house which isn't that close, and she hates driving and was also not given any money from her work either so couldn't afford it. I kept telling him this, hoping he'd say to see each other less again, but he kept saying "it really isn't that much" even though it was twice a week and I kept wanting to try to give myself time for my hobbies and uni prep.
Then one day, we argue a lot and he seems to accept trying being friends and being on a break. I felt so much less stress there and enjoyed talking to him more, and once during that week we did meet up and have sex again which I did say over and over I didn't see as a good boundary to ignore if we're just friends, but he at the end of that week told me "we both know we're still together" and that broke me because I finally felt like we had tried a break and it could work and not be a hostile ending. During that week I had downloaded Grindr out of curiosity for half an hour and realised it wasn't for me then left it, and then a day or two before the end of the "break" I downloaded snapchat and used it to sext people again. Once we got back together, I still kept it up even though I knew at that point it was cheating again but I kept justifying it as "we're doomed to fail anyway I'll just break up with him for real one day instead of just letting him refuse it".
I also joined a course chat and accommodation chat to try to get to know the people on my course better and found someone was in my accommodation too and we both got along really well (both nerdy, both sarcastic, both gay and each other's type). I never joined those chats intending to find anyone new, yet someone joked they "shipped" us and we then jokily flirted for a bit until it wasn't a joke anymore and he sexted me, then I, instead of stopping and saying "I actually have a boyfriend, I'm sorry if I led you on" then sent a picture back. We both kept flirting, joking, talking and sexting and I really enjoyed that and finally felt like I was on level ground with someone and found someone I could talk to that shared my interests. During this time I still spoke to my boyfriend as I hated the idea of losing him even though I'd accepted our relationship was a dead end as it was.
Eventually, he found out about me sexting more people on Snapchat again and was so broken again, then in the process of that happening I, once again, trickled the truth, although to a lesser extent as I knew it would be pointless but also had a part of me desperate to hide it. I also told him about the other guy and he was so much more hurt obviously because it was more emotional than just sexting some random guy. I was terrified of losing him in my life but could see this relationship was beyond toxic and all I'd done is push him away, and yet he was begging me to stay even then. I eventually agreed to try even with him telling me I was being abusive saying no when he "should be the one ending things", and it's been a mixed bag for the last few weeks since. I spoke to the other guy briefly once or twice in general conversation and spoke to him one last time to say "I need time to myself to think, I'm sorry" after I'd told him about the fact I had a boyfriend and been airing him barring the exceptions (which included the night before). I have since moved past that crush of that guy and he's also moved on, and I've not spoken to him (at least, not without my boyfriend next to me to see what he's said or what I'm saying when saying we can't be friends) and things are still messy.
My boyfriend realised some of his faults and has actually improved and that's given us some times which are actually good, but a lot has still been arguments and stress and pain which I do understand given what I've done, but given I'd told him over and over that I can't try anymore and don't want to try for this relationship and now have to help him hurt from one of the worst things I possible could've done to him is putting more strain on me, my mum and my little time I have left to do what I've wanted. My boyfriend has since said "if I knew it was a break or cheating, I would have taken the break" but even I didn't know and I feel like that is a bullshit response to why he never gave me a break when I literally begged.
He's always insisted he couldn't do a break, but I've also insisted I need to have one to help fix my mental health without throwing my progress away each time we argue. I have always been the one to compromise until now, where I was telling him I need a break and it is non-negotiable, and now he's given me two and a bit days to myself to try to work out if I want to try in our brute force approach to our relationship or want to break up and possibly not even speak again when I ultimately want to be friends, even if we don't speak for months to be able to do so. I have no idea where I stand and I feel much more relaxed in general on my own and don't feel like I have an added "deadline" to my life all the time, but I also worry if I say "I want to be friends" that he'll cut me out forever, or take out his pain on himself after me breaking up AND after the cheating (he's very self destructive when things go wrong and I worry as he's not got a proper support network at the moment despite me telling him to build one).
I also have a part of me that wants to give us a go, or to at least wait it out until he's better and seeing if I want to try to be with him then or just break up then without him being self-destructive. The issue is, at least with the latter option, that if I try to break up after things are finally good, he may never accept it unless I cut him out of my own life or cause another big issue which I don't want either as both will end up with him hurt even more and potentially deciding to tell everyone I'm close to about our toxic relationship. I worry about him, and what he might do to me or himself, but I worry the most about losing him completely and hate the idea of just losing him when maybe one day our relationship could be amazing, just maybe not now.
What should I do? I'm at a loss.
TL;DR: I have been in a mutually abusive relationship for the last 3 years, with only really the first year not being abusive, me being the catalyst to us having major problems and those problems leading up to issues of us both being abusive to each other and me feeling disconnected from and unequal in our relationship and out of control of my own life. Things have escalated with me cheating recently by sexting someone I've only just met who will be on my course and in my accommodation at uni in the next week, and now he's trying to both hurt and give me a great relationship and I'm trying to decide if I even want this relationship or what I should do (especially as I don't want to lose him and he's often insisted we could never talk again if we broke up). What are your suggestions?
(P.S Sorry for the long as fuck post but I really need to add the context and appreciate anyone who's read it all)
submitted by ThrowRAHLLO to relationships [link] [comments]

2020.09.10 00:59 gardenfaiiri I complained to my mum about not feeling “thin” or “sick” enough to recover, and her response was to show me a photo of an extremely underweight person.

Honestly I’m so triggered, I’ve been really struggling and falling hard and fast back into old habits. I really want to recover but I’ve struggling a lot with the feeling that I was never “thin” or “ill” enough to deserve recovery, especially because I don’t think I looked like my BMI, nor do I think I look sickly thin. I was comparing about this to my mum last night, and for whatever reason she decided that best response to that was to show me an image that contained the nude body of an extremely UW model. I think the worst part is I know the BMI of the girl in the photo, so not only was I comparing my image to the woman in the photo, but I was also comparing stats.
I told me mum it was triggering, I told her it made me feel bad and really wasn’t an appropriate response especially because now I’m just going to compare myself to this model. (The image she showed me I’d seen before, a few month ago I have a really unhealthy relationship with this photo, I’ve been trying desperately to push it out of my mind but now it’s been brought back to my attention). When I told her these things she just scoffed and said “don’t tell me you really want to look like that, it’s gross”, which was just really invalidating and made me feel so dumb for getting i part about it. The truth is that clearly she doesn’t understand, which I respect, I know an ED and it’s complexities are difficult to fully grasp if you have never dealt with such, but honestly I’m still a little shaken up by it. I just want to rid my mind if that picture, I feel like I’m not good enough or worthy of treatment until I get my BMI down as far as hers, it sick, I hate that I think this way. And I’m sorry this I do.
submitted by gardenfaiiri to EDAnonymous [link] [comments]

2020.09.06 10:30 Reubentui A little help?

So, I posted something along the lines of this in another forum and they told me to come here.
When I was 3, my mum’s friend took some nude photos of me. I don’t have any memory of this aside from maybe a vague memory of sitting in the waiting room of a police station. I only found out that this happened when my mum told me when I was 13. The thing is, the day after he took photos of me, I told my mum. That’s how she found out. But I’m fairly sure she didn’t ingrain into me before this that taking nude photos is wrong.
I was 3 so they couldn’t really get much information about what happened out of me. So I just want to know:
. Does anyone have any information on whether or not it would be natural for a 3 year old to recognise this as wrong behaviour even if it hadn’t previously been ingrained into them?
If it isn’t the case that I would have naturally been able to recognise this as wrong, that may mean he had done something more than just take photos as that would probably be more recognisable for a 3 year old as wrong. I’m sorry if this is a bit to the point, but the last time I posted this no one seemed to understand my question.
submitted by Reubentui to CPTSD [link] [comments]

2020.09.03 17:48 4evrtrd Nude mum photos

Hiiii. I'm new to Reddit and found out about RepLadies only a month ago! I've admittedly been glued to the screen ever since. Working from home has given me the freedom to switch tabs to AE / TB whenever there's a dull moment — help!!
I placed my first AE order on July 31st and then quickly scoured this page in efforts to understand TB & Wegobuy so that I could check some things off of my wishlist that I wasn't able to find on AE. My style includes a lot of whites, creams, nudes and gold jewelry so you may notice that theme throughout my list!
Size reference / About me: Mid 20's, 5'8", 125ish pounds, 32B, Size small in most tops, Size 26 pants, Size 2/4 in dresses
AE Finds (** = purchased)
Timeline: Ordered July 31st and arrived September 1st
Orseund Iris Ballerina Wrap Skirt & Blouse Set*\*

Longsleeve Backless Top & Short Set*\*
Ruched Drawstring Sleeveless Dress*\*
Cropped Cutout Tank*\*
Ribbed Two Piece Set*\*
AreYouAmI Faira Corset Dress*\*
Alexander Wang Top — I'm obsessed
Off White Ribbed Tank — Basic b tank, in my cart :)
Cropped Blazer With White Ties — No idea what brand this is trying to be but the hanger says Balmain. Either way I'm in love and it's in my cart
Cozy Ribbed Beachy Set — Planning my trip to Tulum once COVID is finally handled and we're allowed to travel again so I thought this would be a cute lounge outfit for mornings on the beach
Jacquemus Ribbed Shorts — Not branded, just a dupe but they have good reviews and look cozy
Sleeveless Ribbed Set — You're probably seeing a theme here lol
Oversized Sweatshirt & Shorts Set — Looks cozy, but I'd be weary because there aren't any factory photos or reviews yet
Ruffled Micro Bikini — For that eventual trip to Tulum...
Cropped Ruffled Top — Looks just like the photos in all of the reviews so I'm definitely purchasing
Cross Halter Backless Maxi Dress — I have nowhere to wear this but it's giving me *heart eyes*
House of CB Corset — Ordering in black because why not
Another Corset — Just another similar option if you like the one above
House of CB Deep V Chiffon Dress — I think this is House of CB because of the model / backdrop but not 100% sure
Cropped Collared Halter Top — I like it and it's cheap so added to cart
Safety Pin Top — Edgy and cute for a night out / rave / festival (even though I have no idea when these things will return)
Backless Lace Cami — Lacey and cute
Off The Shoulder Ribbed Cardigan — I've been looking for one of these for a long time so yay
Bustier Corset — Has good reviews and I find it to be pretty cute
Candy Shape Pillow — I've been wanting this for my bed! I ordered on TB and the shipping was ridiculous because of the size of the pillow so I just decided to return it and then found it on AE for much cheaper
Linen Pillow Covers — Everyone raves about these and I need new throw pillows for my couch so I'm ordering these covers in Khaki & Brown
Pompom Linen Pillow Cover — Haven't decided if I need this yet but still really cute
Faux Leather Pillow Cover — I like Color B but we'll see...might order, might not
Tortoiseshell Hair Claws — If someone could find me the Balmain ones I would be in heaven, but these are cute too
Gold Twisty Ring — Lol I don't know what the style of this ring is called but I love it
Gold Chain Ring — In my cart
Irregular Pave Baguette Ring — Into this style right now
Another Pave Baguette Ring — Kinda tacky, kinda love it
Celine Knot Bracelet — I've seen a lot of you talk about this on here so it's in my cart, although I don't know if this is the best seller?
TB Finds (** = purchased)
Timeline: Ordered to Wegobuy Warehouse on 8/13, Shipped from warehouse on 8/21, Stuck on Processed through EMS Facility since 8/25
Orseund Iris Box Blazer Wool*\*
Auth | W2C
Gucci Black GG Tights*\*
YSL Oversized Tee*\*
Missoma Aegis Necklace & Bracelet Set*\*
LV Dog Keychain*\*
Alexander Wang Lunchbag Clutch*\*
Dion Lee Cutout Trousers — Need these in my life
Corset Tshirt — Love
Prada Crocs — I don't need these but I'm going to order anyway lol
Alexander Wang Sweats — I want to get my hands on these ASAP I'm in love with the blue color with pink text
My Mum Made It Set — Looks cozy for fall
Orseund Iris Exclusive Racerback Tank — Need it! Here's the AUTH
Orseund Iris Tube Tank — There's a lot of these floating around so I don't know if this is the best seller, but here's the AUTH
Lace Bralette — Looks like Gooseberry Intimates or For Love & Lemons
Dion Lee Corset Top — It's somewhat similar to the AUTH
Zara Asymmetrical Blouse — Classy and I love it
There's a lot more and I'll eventually make a separate list for them later on down the road but these are just some of the things that are in my cart currently! I hope you guys enjoyed looking through them and hopefully my mini reviews helped with the items that have arrived so far.
Thanks for reading! xx
submitted by 4evrtrd to RepLadies [link] [comments]

2020.08.28 12:51 sleepywaterpanda Nude mum photos

it's gotten to the point where i no longer love him anymore but hate him so much that i want to kill him.
he broke up with me 6 months ago because he was no longer in love with me, we were each others first love and dated for 3 years. when he broke up with me in real life i jumped onto the train tracks (suicidal) and he didn't care, the police came and then i ended waking up at the hospital after everything that happened he distanced from me and blocked me for so many months. i tried so much but there's nothing that can change him when i can change myself. He is right about that nothing can be fixed. yes nothing can be ever fixed again
he's blocked me a couple of times and today again he blocked me again. i fucking hate him and his female friend that got along with him way better than me. she goes to the same uni as him, same class, same friendship group, same gaming group. i could never compete with her as she had so much in common with my ex. i even have a photo of my ex and her walking together and I was left behind. and my ex said I was too emotional and always cried and never happy, well no fUCKING shit. i was never a priority in his life as he was too busy with his studies and uni friends. i never received flowers on any special days like other girls and never a card on my birthday.
also he broke up with me because his dad said "SHE'S NOT SMART" and "I WANT SMART GRANDCHILDREN" and his mum said "I DONT LIKE HER LOOKS". jesus fucking christ i fucking hate his family so much too. too many high expectations. i tried my best.
i also hate him so much. i literally WANT TO KILL HIM and then straight after kill myself, stab my heart, in front of his alive or dead body. He was someone that I loved so much with my heart but NOT ANYMORE. I loved him unconditionally, for every flaw of his and didn't see red flags in his actions. I broke up with him once because he didn't appreciate me and took me for granted.
I can't take this anymore. I can't heal from the trauma. Every week I cry from this.
Tell me what are some ways to take revenge on an ex?
I have already signed him up to various subscriptions from websites, free samples or porn videos
I am planning to burn a bunch of plushies that he gave to me and place it on his porch, right in front of his house. And leave a piece of expensive jewellery he got me on his porch too because i dont fucking want it anymore
Or leak his nudes on the internet and ruin his career or becoming a doctor, or work in the medical field (as that's his career goal from uni)
If there comes to a day where i really can't take it anymore i really want to kill him, not that i can because he blocked me on social media and never wants to meet me again. i want to also kill myself in front of his house. i want him to live his life and regret for everything that he did to me. he scarred me and ruined my life.
antidepressent prescribed by my psychologist and psychiatrist do not help.
i don't want to live anymore.
my humanity is gone for people.
submitted by sleepywaterpanda to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.08.17 18:20 ResponsibilityNo3390 Nude mum photos

This post is going to be long and complicated but I haven’t told a single person about this and I think that’s what’s adding to the state of my mental health right now.
When I was 8 months pregnant my boyfriend was arrested under suspicion of distributing indecent imagines of children.
At the time we was living together at my mums house however due to the crime he was suspected of social services were quickly involved by the police and he was forced to move out. We was supposed to be moving into a house together which was already arranged before he was arrested so he moved into this house early since he has no family to go to himself.
My initial response was to cut off all contact with him and not allow him to see his baby once she was born but he was held in custody for 7 hours then dropped back off at my mothers after questioning, he then showed me his bail papers and conditions which explained that he was accused of distributing one indecent image he said he knew nothing about this and that the account the police had traced this to had no link to him and the only reason they arrested him was because the internet provider at his old house (shared accommodation) had linked it to a Samsung phone which him and 1 of his other room mates had.
I believed him as iv never had any suspicion of him being strange around children in anyway not to mention when the police told me about this initially they said that the most recent time of this occurring was 4 months prior around December by which point my boyfriend was living with me and my mum so not at the address it was traced at.
2 weeks after the accusation he left his job saying he couldn’t handle working while this was over his head and his mental Health came first leaving me and our unborn with no income ( I was previously working but had hyperemisis throughout my pregnancy which kept me bed ridden for 6 months so I was let go) I still stayed with him and tried my best to support him even though I didn’t agree with his decision to quit his job as this left us extremely poor and relying on the benefit system which I never wanted for me or my baby. He ignored all advice given to him by me and my family and became extremely lazy he wouldn’t do any work around the house which was supposed to be our family home which includes cleaning, tidying and decorating as the house was and still is in a state that is barely liveable.
He became extremely depressed to the point of him threatening to Kill himself almost every other day this is when I’m 9 months pregnant. This led to paramedics being at the house often as I wasn’t able to be around him due to demands made by Social services and COVID so I took every threat seriously as I’d rather call and him not need it than not call and him do. This all took its toll on me and I was very stressed constantly which led to me being induced early because my baby was no longer growing.
I did not take to the induction at all and did not even get to 1cm. The induction was traumatic and painful for me also due to this as over the course of 4 days I was constantly having my area stretched over 24 hour periods even when it got to the third day and the pain was so bad I had to have gas and air to be examined the midwives ignored me when I said stop because it was too painful and doctors also and went ahead with more treatments anyway. After all this I had a emergency c section which was honestly the most relaxing part of my whole stay at the hospital my boyfriend was allowed to be there at the birth but not allowed to take any photos of our newborn because she would be nude. He stayed for 20 minutes then was told to leave due to Covid restrictions. I was left on my own on the ward with my newborn unable to move. Midwives were there to help however they didn’t treat me like others there my baby breast fed for the first 2 months of her life and while In the hospital I would try to move to get her and lay back down to feed her but getting her back in her cot was impossible I just didn’t have the strength the midwives noticed this but instead of helping they made comments such as you need to put her down at some point, you need a shower, get up her crib is only there etc. I pushed myself because no one was there to help me and left the hospital 1 night after my c section still barely able to move.
Iv looked after my baby alone all her life ( 2 and 1/2 months.)
Throughout that her dad has being allowed to visit at first it was 3 times a week for 3 hour stay max but he is not allowed to be in the room alone with her or do any type of personal care.
He has since answered his bail twice and due to the police still not finding any evidence this was him he is allowed around children now from the police prospective but unfortunately until the entire investigation is completed social services cannot say the same and he is allowed to be with her as much as he likes but still not allowed to do any personal care and I must monitor him with her constantly.
He is still searching for work and spends more time out with friends than with me or his daughter so much so that she doesn’t know who he his and cries everytime he tries to feed or just hold her. He says he has not being seeing her because due to the accusation he feelings wrong for being around her and cannot look at her face without feeling wrong.
Everything is getting too much for me now, our relationship has broken down because of this we haven’t spent any time as a couple together since this all started in April. Iv had 12 hours away from being a mum since her birth on top of this my mental health is declining rapidly. Most days I’m down and feel so lonely I get through the day but with very little energy. Some days I fantasise about Suicide, others I become so enraged at my life and towards my baby that I slam my head against walls and rip my hair out. I feel so guilty about all this. I try and confined in my boyfriend but he doesn’t care every time I try say I feel lonely he takes this as me having a dig at him for not being here with us to help. This makes me feel like I have no one at all and worsens my mentality. He’s recently admitted that he feels unable to support me emotionally but doesn’t know why.
This crushed me..
He’s currently away having a “break” for his mental Health and today I completely broke down. I get light headed, dizzy and so angry all I can think of doing is screaming or punching things once that goes away I feel so alone and depressed all I do is cry.
I feel like a terrible mum and I don’t know how much longer il be able to take any of this.
(My boyfriend is schizophrenic and this causes him to have outbursts where he “runs away” when things become too much, he’s currently on medication and anti depressants.)
I just needed to tell someone please don’t share this post.
submitted by ResponsibilityNo3390 to Postpartum_Depression [link] [comments]

2020.08.11 13:10 WoodenEngineering787 Nude mum photos

Firstly, I would like to mention, this is not a throw away acc, I'm new to reddit. I didn't realise "ThrowRA" Could prevent my post from being deleted. I often read stories on reddit but recently decided to sign up in order to gauge opinions against my own, in order to gain more understanding over my feelings.
I'm going to write a long story, me personally, I have enjoyed reading others experiences and believe context is paramount, so here is my context -
I have been with my girlfriend now for around 26 months... That is including a casual dating period of a few months. When we first met we literally spent every day and night together, crazily in love, whatever you'd like to call it. We casually dated for around 6-8 weeks until we started having commitment conversations, whilst casual I asked if we sleep with anyone else that protection is a must... This sparked a conversation of sleeping with others, she suggested that we just don't sleep with anybody else, as that'll make things easier, I wasn't sure, but said yes, and agreed, maybe to impress.
At the time we were living separately but spending every single day with one another, my girlfriend was struggling so we agreed to share an apartment as it just made sense. I had a friend with cheap properties and organised it for us, felt I was helping the woman I love...During our casual dating time (early in), I trusted her but there were a few red flags I ignored, these flags caught up with my insecurities months down the line. - Red flags like, a specific guy called quite frequently when I was with her, she'd ignore his facetimes etc, This same guy came to our city for his birthday, she went out with the pair of guys and a friend, that evening her phone battery died so I did not hear from her till late the next day. i did trust her, but the battery dying happened more than once and I began to build suspicion. I asked her if they(boys) slept at her apartment she said no they got a hotel. This same guy had driven over 2.5 hours to "study" at her apartment previously too. Whilst we were dating she met this guy at least once a week on average.. When I asked about that as it felt odd she told me there's nothing to worry about as he is just a friend and he has a girlfriend, I felt a little assured. She had a birthday party around those early days and invited me and this guy to her party, I didn't attend but it was another evening her phone battery died and I didn't hear from her till the morning. I spoke to a friend about this, his response was "what girlfriend would allow their boyfriend to travel over 2 hours to go and study with a hot chick in the evening?" - It made sense and something just didn't quite add up..
Anyway, we moved in together after all of the red flags, we spoke about it, she continued to reassure me there was nothing to worry about, and I was not satisfied with the answers but we continued to move forward with the property. She often let me use her iPad, she was out one day, and curiosity took over. I stumbled across messages and photos which made me realise this specific guy was someone she had slept with over a year or so ago, and they had a past, an intimate one. I also seen videos of the morning after her phone battery died, the guys were at her apartment, I asked about this, but she said they got a hotel and came back over the next day... I asked about the guy and at first she denied it, she realised I had read things on her iPad and admitted they had a history but nothing recent, all recent contact was friendly and there sexual encounters were way prior to me.... Now of course I found it difficult to believe but I am in love so I continued to move forward with this lady... (this all happened prior to our commitment and during the first few of months of committing) - She promised me things like no nudes were sent, but I could see in the chat she had sent photos to him before we got together... - I would like to add I am not upset what happened before me**,** I was upset about the lies, and what may have potentially occurred behind my back when were together. Around this specific guy nothing was actually bought to me or informed, she just admitted to what I had seen, anything I didn't see, she said was not true.
I think the disappointment from this left me without I hope, around 6 months into our 26 month commitment I cheated with a colleague from work. Around 8 months in I cheated again with an Ex. I told her about the colleague but was too ashamed to tell her about my ex. She accepted that we had both made mistakes and she was happy to start again on a clean slate.
Fast forward, now around 20 months in, I'm having issues and have made other mistakes like following inappropriate models on IG, or messaging old female friends inappropriate flirtatious chat. For some time I felt so guilty and realised I needed to change my ways and since then I was honest and did my best as a loyal boyfriend... I had received messages from my ex which I ignored due to an epiphany of being loyal and stopping the behaviour. In my mind I hadn't cheated in over a year and I was onto bigger and better things with my gf.
Fast forward to 25 months in, and a anonymous IG account that someone had made, messaged my girlfriend to inform them of my encounter with my ex. Obviously my heart sank because I hadn't been honest about this in the past, even when questioned. My bitter ex exaggerated truth to hurt and damage the relationship we had...
As this was the second time, she rightly so, lost her head, my girlfriend then emailed professionals, family members and called my parents. My mother who has mental health issues, and my gf sent my mother screenshots of conversations I had, and an image of a woman a spoke to on IG. She did that off the back of an argument we had weeks after she was informed of what happened.
We had a big fall out, since I organised counseling as I'm aware my behaviour is tied into sexual abuse from my childhood. I am really trying to fix the source of my issues.. I have deleted all social media and taken action of some of the triggers to my behaviour.
I am now living with my mother after our break, she is obsessed over what happened, as she really does love my gf too.... she constantly makes derogative comments towards me, not to be mean but due to her illness she can often be irrational. My gf told her family, which no longer have the same respect for me, I seen my gfs aunt recently and was given dirty looks. I lost my job, my partner, and now I feel like my family relationship is breaking down due to my actions. The fact she shared all this information with my mother who is ill, has filled me with a lot of anger because now my home life is also deteriorating. My sisters are gossiping about it behind my back, her friend that used to respect me knows and doesn't think the best of me either. I didn't want to keep it a secret but do not see the benefit of dozens of people knowing.. They all offer advice that doesn;t always help. It's damaged a lot of relationships I have in my life.
I accept that the time frame of me cheating (over 18 months ago) does not change the fact that I cheated. However I do feel I was making positive progress towards being the man I want to be for the love of my life. I'm seriously struggling with guilt, anger and humiliation. Most days it is causing me to feel depressed, I have very little to distract me due to unemployment and being in a different city to my hometown. I have no where to go and do not want to turn to females who often offer comfort in these type of situations. I am trying my best to stay strong.
I think a big reason we've had so many issues is because of unresolved issues, I still do not believe her about the way she was with this guy in the early days and that insecurity and disbelief has spiralled out of control.
I know she loves me as she gave me another chance which I blew, we agreed we can try again but I have to be honest I felt like am fighting a lost cause, a sinking ship so to say... I still love her, she is perfect for me, I'm sure she loves me too.
I want to move forward with her, but I'm unsure if that is possible now? Is too much damage done?
We've both made mistakes, mine have been worst in my opinion, however I am not here for betteworst as it creates competition..
I would like some genuine advice... I'm trying to be positive with her but whilst my mum is continuing to call me things like "male slag" it can be extremely difficult to be optimistic.
counselling is okay but it moves slow, I've never felt so low in all my life and am becoming concerned....
For any one in a similar scenario would be "BE HONEST" tell your partner the bad news rather than letting it marinate for over a year like I did.
submitted by WoodenEngineering787 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.08.09 19:59 Meow029x Nude mum photos

btw im not fully blaming shane dawson so for me being groomed i feel like i should mention that. so im pretty sure people here have seen the video of this youtuber saying how shane dawson made it easier for groomers to groom people. btw all my experience was online with apps like movie star planets, musically and discord.

i have been groomed 3 times for some strange fucking reason but yk what it happend and i FINALLY know the warning signs and know whats right and wrong but i had to learn that by myself. so when i was around 8 i started to watch shane dawson but this was shane dawson at the time more recent food videos but i wanted to be a true fan and watch his old videos and i use to be so confused how i learned about blow jobs and porn or stuff but i did know about sex cus my mum told me but she never told me about blow jobs and all these stuff a 8 years old should not be knowing and i finally realised holy fuck it was them videos i use to watch and for some reason it never clicked with me.
then when i was 9 i met this girl on movie star planet and me and her talked/ dated for 5 months and when we was together she was ask me if i would watch porn and cus i now know porn i thought it was acceptable to talk about it i thought it was normal, i thought it was fine . but now i know that that girl wasn't a 9 year old i don't know how old she was of if it was a girl but i know they was not a 9 year old by the way they acted and spoke to. and i would tell them all about me and i trusted them cus i felt so fucking lonely then my friends was horrible to me and me and my mum was arguing all the time it was not a good place and i would come to her for comfort. but then they would do some shady things like telling me i should cut myself which i now have a dependency for 6 years later and i dont know how i can stop . she then asked me sexual question like do i touch myself and just stuff like that and then she finally asked me for some nudes, i told her no i dont want to, i even tried to be funny and send her a nude make up pallet but she kept on asking for at least an hour and cus i trusted her so much and i had this need for her back then i didnt want to lose her... and she kept on saying stuff like she needed it and she need this and for a 9 year old thats pressures them they dont know any better.
so i sent her the photo but later that day i realised that wasnt good so i told her goodbye i broke up with her and i blocked her and i never told anyone till a year later where my mum found out. cus of that one time i got groomed i even to this day its kind of a habit i show off my body to guys thinking thats what a relationship is thats how i make this guy love me. i found someone which we're not together who makes me think other wise and i rlly hope i can be with him cus honestly all i want is him.
anyways sorry but i just kind of wanted to share my story and even tho i did get groomed/blackmailed 2 more times i don't feel like its anything to do with shane dawson jsut more of the toxic relationship i had then when i was 13. and please if you got groomed online please tell your parents or the authorities so they dont get away with it and hurt other more kids.
submitted by Meow029x to ShaneDawson [link] [comments]

2020.07.31 20:16 pinklemonadeclown Should I be mad at my mum for being so strict about how I use social media and the content I am exposed to?

Apologies for the terrible formatting, I'm writing this on my phone. To clarify, I'm a 13 year old female, but I'm not stupid and know a dodgy situation when I see one. I was only allowed to get social media on my 13th birthday and up until that point I had been feeling so bitter because all of my peers had started accounts when they were about 10. My mum always follows the age guidelines and it gets really frustrating. Despite being so strict about what I'm exposed to she goes on and on about how mature I am for my age and that just confuses me. She knows full well that I know how sex works and that I'm pretty desensitized to violence and strong language but she never wants me to see anything age restricted. Again, this is frustrating as it makes me feel like I'm being treated like a child compared to all of my peers. She makes it clear that under no circumstances am I allowed to post pictures of myself on social media. Obviously I know not to post stuff like nudes but I'm talking about just pictures of me hanging out with friends or having a moment I want to share. I'm really self conscious and have only just started to feel better through looking at photos my friends and I have taken. I know that there are creeps out there but I also know to just block them. Because of that rule I've had to tell my friends to not post a photo/video with me in it online and they always give me a look of annoyance and I honestly don't blame them. Usually when we're hanging out and they pull out their phones to do a video for Instagram or tik tok I end up sitting out because my mum doesn't want me putting myself on social media. Oh yeah, I also forgot to mention that my mum, despite saying all this, has posted embarrasing photos of me as a kid that I definitely did not consent to her putting on Facebook. All of these things make me feel really left out and angry because I feel like she treats me as a child but expects me to act like an adult, as cliche as that sounds. So, is she right and I'm just being an edgy teen or should I try to do something about it?
submitted by pinklemonadeclown to Advice [link] [comments]

2020.07.21 10:34 gettinridof2112 Nude mum photos

Dear all I’m truly drained and need some advice I’ve known my boyfriend over ten years and lived with him over 4 years now BUT first month his work phone started ringing and he was away with his parents so l looked on screen and photos popped up of this girl so I clicked on them I knew snooping was wrong !! But I was shocked !! Nude pics talking about perving her out asking for sex .. so confrontation with his parents involved was not pleasant but I forgave him !! 6 months later after a great relationship very loving with all family as I have a big family !! I caught him on sex sites talking to woman !! Yet another fight .. he turned his parents against me even !! Honestly I’m broken just now as caught him messaging another woman to meet up for coffee who has been in and out or life since he moved in and she is I’m sure clinically insane as got taken to court by x for abuse ??!! She messaged me a very nasty message when I said to back off away from him but then I feel it’s his fault Now we are separated but he also takes pics of his dick watching porn !!!! I mean what’s that about !! Told him to seek help but I honestly am so in love with him and I know he loves me I’m not a stupid woman but he’s a Middle aged man Does he need help or is he just a born lied cheat and CREEP ??? Should I help him or tell him to get out my life !!!!!! Hard as he is so so good with my son too my whole family love him but are so disappointed in him !! His mum says he’s in bits so WHY do all of this we had a great life together ?? Thank you so much x
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2020.07.15 18:03 Emmy_C484 Nude mum photos

So this is gonna be a long one. Also again trigger warning mentions of sexual abuse, self harm and suicide.
When I was 13 I got into a relationship with someone who was 14. We were in the same school year (UK) and he seemed really nice. Then when we got together things took a turn.
I always had to have my location on so he could see where I was and when I was last active. If I was active on a social media app and he messaged me two minutes ago and I hadn’t replied yet I got hell for it. About how I must not love him anymore. He made me live by my phone. I couldn’t spend time with my family or friends without messaging him. I’ll never forget, for my 14th birthday I went to the Harry Potter studios with my family. I’m a massive Harry Potter fan (it’s literally on as I’m writing this now) and I was so excited. But he made me spend the whole time messaging him. I didn’t enjoy it. I barely remember a thing.
I know it sounds stupid, how can someone have that much of a hold over you through text. He would spam me, guilt me and threaten to leave me. He did it in such a way that I felt like I couldn’t live without him. That I needed him.
I’m the time I was with him (six months) I saw my friends maybe two or three times. I wasn’t allowed to spend time with friends or family. I had to tell him my every move. I wasn’t allowed to spend any time with anyone but him. Or I had hell to pay.
I was self harming when we were together. He called me selfish. We also had to go and pick him up off a bridge because he threatened to kill himself.
Then things took a turn. As most relationships do things started getting a bit heated. I wasn’t comfortable doing most of what we did. But no wasn’t a word in his dictionary. If I said no he pestered and pestered and guilted me into doing it. I didn’t want to. But I felt I had no choice. Then one day things went too far and he sexually assaulted me. I’m not going into detail but it wasn’t rape.
I feel extreme guilt about it. I didn’t realise what he was doing at first. Not until after it was done. The guilt and shame I feel about it. Especially because I didn’t know.
We broke up a few weeks later.
Then he started blackmailing me. Anonymously. He forced me to send him a photo of me in a bikini. Not the worst thing in the world but it was horrific to me at the time. He threatened to put it on his story and tag me and publicly humiliate me if I didn’t send him nudes. I didn’t.
I reported it to the police and everything came out. My memory of everything is fuzzy. I’m self harming and suicidal but I remember having to fill out a form detailing my assault. They got a confession from him. But they don’t like to label minors criminals and even if it did go to court his confession wouldn’t be enough to prove it happened. So basically your classic boys will be boys.
It also wasn’t reported to my school properly by my parents. So I had to see him every single day for the next two years. I lost everything. My friends didn’t believe me, I got harassed by his friends. School was hell.
When I did tell my parents they dismissed it. Then when I finally told my mum what happened a few months back the first words out of her mouth were ‘’the only thing you did wrong was put yourself in that situation”. It hurt. It just reinforced what I already believed. That it was my fault. I’m slowly learning that it wasn’t.
Finally I’m seeking therapy. I felt shamed by my parents before. Because it wasn’t that bad and and others have had it worse so I could do it on my own. I couldn’t. I’d been begging them for a year to take me and they haven’t. They only are now.
Over the past two years I’ve thought a lot. It took a while to come to terms with what happened. I still don’t think I have yet. Not fully. Months of my memory are just black. I’m missing details, major events like Christmas. It’s just dark. Nothings there. Maybe it was me being on autopilot in the months afterwards.
I’m 16 now. I have the most amazing boyfriend. I was scared of how he’d react when I told him I’m finally ready to seek therapy and talk about it. I thought maybe he’d assume that I’m not past it. But he’s incredibly supportive of me going. I’ve never told him how much everything’s affected me but he told me he knows. He can see it in me.
I’ve been clean for a year, finally fixing my family relationships, helping them realise that the things they said hurt me more and not helped. Pulled my grades up from E’s/F’s to A’s/B’s. On my own.
So I’m getting there. Slowly. To anyone else in a similar position if you’ve just left an abusive relationship, it gets better. I promise❤️
submitted by Emmy_C484 to abusiverelationships [link] [comments]

2020.07.09 21:54 alidorology Nude mum photos

Shipping not included, you pay, but if that's an issue for you I'm happy to work something out. If. you buy multiple things it'll be cheaper. All prices negotiable. All wear I can find is shown in photos. Get a $5 item of your choice free w/ any purchase at least $10. I'm happy to measure anything you'd like.

$5 Tops
Ralph Lauren pink striped oxford size S
Tommy Hilfiger long sleeve tee size L
Preston & York beige linen button down size 12
Lands' End yellow top size S
Pirate's Booty grey tee size M
LL Bean purple top size S
Ruby Rd layered red, white, and blue blouse size M (liner came detached on one shoulder, has been repaired)
Express gold sequin tank size S
Talbots blue and black geometric tee size S
Chico's brown tank size 0 (fits S, tags clipped)
Sprite tee size L
H&M black floral tie-neck blouse size 4 (matching skirt below)
Snoopy baseball tee size M
Goofy ringer tee size L (had a hole on the side that has been stitched up)
Master's Degree tee size S
Stranger Things tee size L
Blue Callaway polo size S
Loft floral tank size XXSP
Sassy pink crop top size L (some lighter spots as shown in last pic)
Floral button down size S (Chinese brand, unsure of actual size but fits like S)
Rock & Republic studded collared shirt size XS
Charlotte Russe black floral blouse size S
Blue popcorn shirt (OS)
Ann Taylor black lace cami size XS
"FEMME" crop top size M
Talbots pink textured tee size S
White Stuff cowl neck butterfly blouse size 6
ExOfficio burgundy long sleeve tee size M
Cabi white cami size XS
This weird tee, size S
Simply Vera Wang red and black velvet tank size XS
Mudd black and white tank size XS
Lucky Brand blue and white tee size L
Nike polo size S
90 Degree black and white striped workout tee size M NWT
Justice blue boho blouse size kids 16 (fits women's S)
J. Crew black and white striped Studio Tee size M
Jocelyn Smith blue tee size M NWT
Erika plaid button down size S NWT
Gloria Vanderbilt navy and white striped lace up tee size MP NWT
Life is Good bike tee size XS

$10 Tops
Lafayette 148 NY blue knit tank size L
Foxcroft tropical embroidered oxford size 4
Theory cream silky button down size S (see photos for wear)
Cabi silk sheer pink blouse size S
Solitaire blue and white geometric boho blouse size S NWT
Boden burgundy wrap blouse size 4
Forever 21 black and white gingham ruched top size L (has buttons attached but no tag, never worn)
J. Jill green tunic top size S
Aerie waffle knit long sleeve shirt size M
Blue and white striped off-the-shoulder boho blouse size L
Vintage glitter sweetheart blouse size 10
Halston marbled sheer silk blouse size XS
Bisou Bisou pink satin tank size 6
Elie Tahari grey ruched sleeve tee size L
Athleta cowl neck tank size XS
Lord & Taylor red silk button down size 6
Paul Stanley olive silk blouse size 8
Vintage silk leaf print blouse size XL
Talbots pink silk tank size 2P
Boden tomato red blouse size 4
J. Jill sheer brown button down size XXSP
Tobi white cross back blouse size XS
NFL Chicago Bears Brian Ulracher jersey size XS (girls size XL)
Theory striped peasant blouse size M
Ralph Lauren Sport brown houndstooth button down w/ elbow patches size 6

$20 Tops
Club Monaco sheer silk floral blouse size 0
Tommy Hilfiger custom button down size XL
Laurence Kazar black beaded silk tank size S
Tesla grey button down size XL
"I was a beefeater" patch button down size S (patch on an Old Navy shirt)

$5 Bottoms
Navy blue Talbots skirt size 8P (has a couple markings that will prob come out with water)
J. Crew floral pencil skirt size 0
Lularoe thick winter leggings "Tall and Curvy"
J. Crew coral cropped slacks size 8
J. Crew tomato red slacks size 0
LL Bean ochre cords size 2 (some wear on seat)
Gap slim fit jeans size 0, slightly flared
Sunset leggings size S
Galaxy leggings size S
Forever 21 black ribbed velvet wrap skirt size L
Zara floral brocade mini skirt size L
Tahari black knee-length skirt size 10
Connected Apparel brown and white skirt size MP
Simply Vera Wang purple watercolor skirt size 2
H&M black floral midi skirt size 2 (scroll up for matching top in sz 4)
Forever 21 hunter green denim skirt size L NWT
Attyre black skort with pockets size 8
American Eagle red corduroy skirt size 12
Zac & Rachel khaki skort size 12
Attyre khaki rivet skort with pockets size 12
RBX black athletic shorts size M NWT
Reel Legends spandex shorts size M
Champion spandex shorts size L
Champion spandex shorts size M
Reebok athletic shorts size M
MPG athletic shorts size M
Reel Legends black and white athletic shorts size S
Adidas spandex shorts size M
Dickies black skirt size 10
Dickies black skirt size 10 NWT

$10 Bottoms
Brown Columbia skirt size M
Black Columbia skirt size M
Vineyard Vines pink striped skirt size 12
Brooks Brothers beige linen slacks size 4
Lilly Pulitzer navy chinos size 2
J. Jill slim white cords size 4P
Banana Republic red linen skirt size 6
Massimo Dutti olive cropped soft slacks size 10
Blue flamingo pants size 4
American Eagle yellow plaid skirt size L NWT
Another American Eagle yellow plaid skirt size L NWT
Rafaella Weekend navy skort size M (weird wrinkled hem)
Boden apple print skirt size 6
Talbots black linen skirt size 2P
JM Collection blue floral long linen skirt size 12P
Ann Taylor watercolor linen skirt size 4
Vintage athletic skirt size S NWT
Loft burgundy maternity cords size 00M
American Eagle pastel button skirt size L NWT
H&M blue and white striped paperbag skirt size 10 NWT
Levi's Denizen jeans size 10M NWT

$15 Bottoms
Lilly Pulitzer denim pencil skirt size 4
Paige Denim vegan leather jeans/pants size 29
7 for all Mankind black skinny jeans size 26 (small amt of puckering on inner thigh)
Joe's Jeans black jeans size 27
Tibi green wrap skirt size 6 (size tag clipped, measurements upon request, tiny stain as shown)
Nicole Miller metallic pencil skirt size 10
J. Jill silky patchwork skirt size 4P
American Eagle mustard yellow rose skirt size L NWT
J. Crew skinny stretch jeans distressed size 28

$20 Bottoms
Citizens of Humanity black skinny jeans size 26 (small amt of puckering on inner thigh)
David Meister turquoise and rust metallic maxi skirt size 8 This is the most beautiful thing I own

$5 Jackets/Sweaters
Ralph Lauren blue sweater size M (see stains in photos)
American Weekend red and white striped mock neck sweater size M (some pilling)
Tahari pinstriped blazer size 8
Elle faux fur grey vest size XS
MPG pink and black hoodie size L
Adidas white sweater size L
Puma black and blue track jacket size M
Columbia blue lightweight hoodie size S

$10 Jackets/Sweaters
Ralph Lauren grey turtleneck size SP
Madewell white thin sweater size XS
Ralph Lauren black and white cardigan size MP
Love on a Hanger cream knit sleeveless cardigan size M NWT
Eddie Bauer pink sweater size XS
J. Crew grey sweater size M
Sigrid Olsen pink wool cardigan size XL
Nautica yellow sweatshirt size S NWT
LC Lauren Conrad sheer boho batwing white sweater size XS
Michelle Stuart vintage v-neck sweater size M
Columbia olive and black wool sweater size S
VS vintage red kimono size M (tear in side has been stitched up)
Athleta blue striped jacket size S
Nike "España" jacket size S
J. Jill green geometric sweater size XS
J. Jill cream chenille sweater size S (soo soft)
Vintage indigo striped sweater (fits S, no size marked)
Evelyn Grace leopard print cashmere cardigan size S
Express grey blazer size 0

$20 Jackets/Sweaters
Joie cashmere/lambswool grey split back sweater size XS
Madewell cream sweater size XS
Ralph Lauren beige lace up sweater size S
PINK red quarter zip size M
Eileen Fisher purple turtleneck size XSP
SUGOI neon yellow windbreaker size S (small stain as shown)
Nina Charles x Kasper wool blend leopard print sweater size S
J. Jill soft denim jacket size S
Talbots vintage cream silk blazer size 4
Vintage black leather jacket size M
Miller High Life patched flannel size M
NASA/NASTY patched denim overshirt size M
Express black faux fur tie waist sweater size M NWT

$5 Dresses
Modcloth green polka dot dress size XXS (see photos for wear)
Charlotte Russe baby blue mini dress size XS
Old Navy blue and white polka dot maternity dress size XS (belt not included)
Liz Claiborne green linen halter dress size 4
Sedú vintage red lace slip size M
Lularoe floral shirt dress size M

$10 Dresses
Adrianna Papell black bandage dress size XSP (altered to fit 0-2P from a 2)
Loft tie waist geometric dress size XXSP
Liz Logie floral shirt dress size 6, has a small bleach stain as shown
Diane von Furstenberg geometric sweater dress size 2 (see pics for wear)
Vintage prairie dress size 8
Wendye Chaitin white lace dress size S
Motherhood Maternity navy and white striped dress size SM
Molerani blue tee dress size M NWT

$15 Dresses/Rompers
Free People red polka dot slip dress size L
Calvin Klein houndstooth A-line dress size 0P
Zara vegan leather romper size XS
Vintage athletic set size S (marked S and 8 but fits top XS-S and bottom 4)

$20 Dresses
BCBGMaxAzria black tiered dress size XS
Madewell red midi dress size 0 (small amt of discoloration under armpits, could be removed w dry cleaning)
Club Monaco red midi dress size 2
Nicole Miller burgundy ruched mini dress size 2P

$30 Dresses
Marc by Marc Jacobs blue silk pleated dress size 2
Elie Tahari one-shoulder silk watercolor dress size 8

Just pay shipping shoes
Jessica Simpson black pumps size 7.5, some peeling

$10 Shoes
Annie gold kitten heels size 6.5
J. Jill black suede flats size 7.5
Jessica Simpson gold wedges size 6.5
Circus by Sam Edelman tan strappy heels size 9.5
Anne Klein Sport woven black slides size 7.5 - A little wear on the bottoms and the logo but all around excellent condition.

$20 Shoes
Hush Puppies SoftStyle black pumps size 7.5W NIB
Timberland Earthkeepers size 7
Sam Edelman nude wedges size 8.5
Ferragamo white slingbacks size 10
Scene black wedge sneakers size 7
Fossil black studded platform sandals size 7
Clarks grey suede loafers size 5.5/6
Jack Rogers gold glitter Jack Flats size 8
Nike white sneakers size 6
Skechers pink fur boots size 11

$30 Shoes
Coach black kitten heels size 7.5
Sam Edelman black suede booties size 9
Eddie Bauer black calf stiletto boots size 7
Donald J. Pliner leopard print fur flats size 10
Stuart Weitzman grey plaid buckle pumps size 8.5
Jack Rogers bronze metallic Jack Flats size 9
Jack Rogers silver metallic Jack Flats size 9.5

$5 Accessories
UNC belt
Silk scarves: 1, 2, 3, 4
Other scarves: 1 (Duluth Trading Co.), 2 (Miley Cyrus), 3, 4 (a couple runs & puckering, not noticeable when worn), 5, 6
Hair clips (rly just pay shipping)
Shell necklace
Faux pearl double stranded necklace
Leather beaded necklace
Faux crystal necklace

$5 Purses
Isaac Mizrahi blue shoulder bag

$10 Purses
Tommy Hilfiger crossbody 1
Tommy Hilfiger crossbody 2
Etienne Aigner white leather purse
Etienne Aigner rainbow canvas bag
Blue leather crossbody

$20 Purses
Jimmy Choo bucket bag (see photos for peeling)
Coach classic canvas bag

$5 Bras
Silver sequin bralette (kids M, fits XS)
VS pink pushup bra 34A
Wacoal nude convertible bra 36DDD

$20 Bras
VS black lace bustier 34C
Hanky Panky nude wire-free bralette 32D NWT
Hanky Panky white wire-free bralette 32D NWT

Individually priced stuff
UGG black Sundance Revival knee-high fur boots size 7: $40
Prada wedge flip flops size 6.5: $80
Jack Rogers multicolor glitter Jack Flats size 9 - $50. Worn once.
Donald J. Pliner black snakeskin Fifi slides size 7.5 - $70. Sold out online. These are in excellent condition, only worn once. There's a tiny nick on the toe as shown but it's not noticeable when worn.
Vintage Gucci wallet: $70
Hand painted upcycled snake leather purse: $40, has some wear as it's a vintage item, NWT
Vintage Dior skirt size 4, matches blazer: $35 (fits like 00, no brand tag since it came w the blazer in a set)
Lilly Pulitzer agate green safari sights Callahan shorts size 8 NWT: $60
Vintage wool colorblock coat size M: $70 (one clasp is a little loose)
The North Face black winter coat size XS: $55 (white marks are on inside, not visible when worn)
Giorgio Armani vintage silk blazer size 4: $60
Saks Fifth Ave. pink pong set: $10
Helmut Lang grey belted vest size L: $65
Converse x John Varvatos sequin belted track jacket size L: $30
Alice + Olivia Jazz tomato red strapless dress size 6 NWT: $60
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